do you like solitude?do you think we have an inherent need to be with people to feel comfortable with ourself?

Question

How many of you really like solitude? A lot of people say that you don't mind staying on your own if you are comfortable with who you are... was just wondering how this relates being lonely..does feeling lonely mean that you depend upon the company of others to feel comfortable with youself?

Answer 1

I think most, if not all, of us need both - solitude at times and socialization at other times.
Humans are "social animals, generally speaking, but the amount of solitude a person wants/needs can, I'd say, differ from individual to individual.
The more extroverted a person is, the more socialization he/she will require; the more introverted, the more solitude he/she will desire.
There's a big difference, though, between being alone and being lonely. You can be lonely when surrounded by people and you can be quite content when alone.
The more self-sufficient you are, the more inner resources you have to call upon, the more you will be able not only to tolerate "aloneness", but actually to enjoy it.

Answer 2

I love solitude. I have ever since I can remember. As a child I remember really enjoying the times I could steal away and read or play alone. I have always been creative, so the moments of solitude for me have always been times when I could ponder life and use those ideas/fantasies in my fiction writing. I think you have many phases in your life. At times I have been more social than others. I have a strong personality and people have always seemed to naturally gravitate toward me for one reason or another, whether it's because they find me funny, or a good listener, or just sense a certain kindness in me. I think that is why I have always been comfortable with solitude and, in fact need it on a regular basis to recharge my batteries. If I had always had a problem getting someone to socialize with me, maybe I would feel differently. Loneliness is another animal altogether. Solitude is peaceful while loneliness has a certain desperation to it.

Love the question!

Answer 3

This is the most interesting question I have seen on Yahoo Answers!

My first thought was that if you are not comfortable with yourself, you may be too self conscious to enjoy the company of other people.

Then evolution has it that we are not sole beings, we do rely on each other just to survive. Humans are wired to be social creatures.

Being lonely, in and of itself, means you desire the company of others. I don't think the word implies poor self esteem, just isolation. You can have people around you and still feel lonely, simply because you don't relate to those around you.

I think solitude is necessary for clear thinking, and sometimes for calmness. It depends a lot on your personality.

I do think we have an inherent need to be with people, because we need the interaction, the stimulation, the connection and for some, APPROVAL.

You seem to allude to an idea of self-esteem (or positive sense of self). Some people need more approval from others. Some people have a healthier self-esteem than others without external approval. This depends entirely on personality, and life experience.

In short, depends on the persons personality...

Answer 4

First I have to say I really love your question, you put a great deal of thought into it.

I absolutely love solitude,
however I have to say I feel that many people seek soltiude because they lack company, or do not feel comfortable in the presence of people, causing them to want to be alone.

rather than A lot of people say that you don't mind staying on your own if you are comfortable with who you are.
I think people more want to be social that seek solitude because they need to receive the validation and consolation that comes from complany, and knowing that people are comfortable with them

Answer 5

Balance is the key. We all need the company of others but we also need time to be on our own. Being alone and being lonely are not the same thing. You can be alone and not feel lonely at all.

It is true that people who just can't stand ever being alone and have to be with other people all the time are usually hiding from themselves or something that they just don't want to deal with. They use constantly being with other people as a distraction from dealing with something that is bothering them.

There is nothing better than becoming your own best friend and enjoying your private time alone with yourself. It makes you a more interesting and connected person when you are in the company of others.

Loving yourself first makes it possible to love and support the other people you love.

Answer 6

Well S ...I think that people must know how to stay alone. To feel the solitude. People who aren't afraid of life enjoy the solitude. They accept themselves as they are, they are not afraid of judging themselves for their failures they are proud of their success.

However it is not healthy if people want to live all alone. My formula is enjoy the solitude but not to last forever, socializing with people and in social events it is a important part also.

Have a nice day!

Answer 7

i think that you need solitude at least a few times a day or so. but you also need social activity. humans crave attention and other humans so being overly aloof would just mentally hurt you. alone time provides some time for reflection. even my daily shower involves me thinking about what i'm going to do today and what happened yesterday, like most people do.

if ur lonely then you need someone to talk to but alone and lonely are different.

Answer 8

that's a really nice question....its the closest to my life. i love solitude, i absolutely love it too. it gives me fresh ideas, it makes me know myself better, it makes me feel the presence of other things except people...like nature etc.

and i must tell you from my experience that there is a difference between being lonely and loving solitude...loneliness is depressing and is not a personal choice whereas being in solitude is a personal choice...and people who are lonely need others to fill a void in their lives which doesn't mean that they aren't comfortable wit themselves....but its just that they love being with ppl! whereas ppl who love solitude need no one but themselves and are entirely independent of any help.

:)

Answer 9

i enjoy solitude because it gives me the space for introspection. i think the only tool necessary to be successful in life is to know yourself and have no misconceptions about yourself.we should be frank to ourselves about our strenghts and weakness.
but please do not compare solitude to loneliness.
one can be a recluse without being lonely.
loneliness is a disturbed state of mind as unlike solitude where one find's clarity of thought.

Answer 10

I prefer to be alone and am happiest when left entirely alone.

I think constantly or am focused on something or rather and am pretty eccentric,so its probably best that i limit my time with others who would find me hard to bear and I them.

But I am a complete extrovert and when i am with people give myself fully to them,so its not always the introverts who are loners.