When I am in a conversation with people I feel stupid and like I dont know what to say. Even in high school I sucked at conversating. The only time I am good at talking is if its with a girl. I don't know whhy but I feel more comfortable talking to girls than guys ( Im a guy), maybe because when I flirt its easy for me but to hold a regualr non-flirting conversation is very hard. Sometimes I feel kinda dumb around people because I feel like I don't know much. Should I read more books to increase my skills? I feel like a real loser at times.
2007-04-07 07:43:57 · 7 answers · asked by NONAME 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
read self-help books, practice on your friends, take an acting class.
2007-04-07 17:24:55 · answer #1 · answered by koh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, you are smart enough to question your own skills of conversation, you must be good.
The secret? develop your listening skills. Conversation is a lost art. People yak and yak for the sake of yakking, are too artificial and dump everything they hear or talk about within seconds of talking to each other.
When you talk, focus your attention on the person you are conversing with. Listen intently to what they have to say. Respond as best as you can to their questions, and remark diplomatically if they launch into a one man tirade or self praise.
Plan an escape route if they talk too much , or move into another group of people. Include those other people into the conversation.
Guys do not talk a lot. They have one liners such as "Hey"
Answer "Hey". Silence.Look around, shuffle shuffle.
As for the books, sure, go for it. The internet is a great source of conversation topics.
The QNH rule is
If you talk about yourself, you are a bore. If you talk about current events, you are forgettable. If you talk about ideas, you will make people uncomfortable. If you make people talk about themselves, you are one great conversationalist.
2007-04-07 08:01:36 · answer #2 · answered by QuiteNewHere 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a sociology major, and I sometimes comment that this is great because I can put every moment of my waking life on my resume. I think it's about the same way with holding conversations. The easiest way to learn how to hold them is to hold them.
2007-04-07 08:27:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm the same way man! Conversation is sooo akward! I find i can speak easier online though, it just takes practice. You have to put yourself in uncomfy situations and try to grow from it. There's this site I go to where I chat and you would never believe I have this sort of problem the way I go on over there! lol It's reallly fun, you should join. Good way to practice.
http://www.imvu.com/catalog/web_landing.php?p=power&userId=10657406
It's a 3d virtual chat, you get an avatar who you can dress up and you get a room you can furnish. You can talk to people in comfortable settings. Add me, my id is iceyhearted. :)
2007-04-07 07:53:22 · answer #4 · answered by icey_hearted 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
get 2 know abt things like movies books football n stuff like that.if its football season, breif urself ond latest upates.grumbling about the opposite teams tatics can b fun even if its not true.
if some gud book or something is gonna release(like harry potter- i totally love it) talk abt what could happen n all
i can talk all night abt that
2007-04-07 08:00:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
in case you fairly need to get it down, you chilly continuously prepare speaking once you're by potential of your self. i understand you mentioned you're shy, yet one good element to do would desire to be to connect a language club. Or in case you do not have one on your section, you may commence one! you probable could prefer a minimum of one the two community English speaker, or somebody who knows the regulations (like an English significant, or instructor) to connect you so which you would be able to understand once you're making blunders. i don't understand your age, yet once you're in college you would be able to desire to continuously take a public speaking direction. i discover they are very efficient whilst it incorporates self assurance advice and the excellent issues to do whilst speaking in public. together as its greater for speeches, it is going to grant you a good commencing place. And in accordance with the place you reside you would be able to desire to be waiting to discover somebody that teaches etiquette classes, which incorporate suited communication.
2016-10-21 07:08:42 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Begin by listening
2007-04-07 07:52:51 · answer #7 · answered by tweety 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋