would you let your husband go out all night with his friends and not come home untill the next morning if you were pregnant? if you wouldnt let him but he did anyway what would you do?
2007-04-07 06:57:45 · 19 answers · asked by Gina B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he told me he was going out after work, he didnt ask he just told. i said.............oook. he didnt call for the rest of the night and he didnt say he wasnt coming back untill the next morning. he said he was at his friends drinking and playing video games all night which i believe (thats not the point though) he said he was too drunk to drive back so he spent the night............he also had to go to work the next morning when came back- i dont think he was cheating or something like that thats not what its really about
2007-04-07 07:11:02 · update #1
im 6 1/2 mos preg.
2007-04-07 07:12:55 · update #2
Unfortuneately we can't always control what other people do even if they are our husband, people will do what they please, but that does not mean that they should not be held accountable for their actions. Did he tell you where he was? Did he call you throughout the night to check in? Did he at least ask you if it would be ok if he did this? And last, if you wanted to go out with the gals all night, would he let you do the same thing? Hold him to the same standard in which he holds you and have a long talk with him about why he did this and how it made you feel. No woman would want to feel left out, mistreated, or taken advantage of. If all else fails, send him back to his mothers house for a month! lol
2007-04-07 07:04:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell him that he was completely wrong and selfish to do such a thing. Not only is it hurtful that he didn't listen but where are his priorities? Was it a close friends bday? Even if it was, he could have gone out for a few hrs then came home. Pregnancy is stressful for the man as well and maybe he snapped but when the child is around he won't have that liberty. You'll have to leave him if he can't face the responsibility of a family. He has a duty towards you and if he's going to act like a party kid and not stay home when you're pathetically uncomfortable with YOUR GUYS' CHILD, then he's not fulfilling it. One more of these acts and I'd be giving him the boot, nobody wants a deadbeat dad who makes yours and Babys life worse.
It's not about control. A husband has his friends as well, if it's agreed that he can go out, no problem. If you tell him that you need him there becuase you're not feeling well that night, he should know to stay home. If you're saying that he has to stay home becuase you can't go out, that's a little selfish of you. I don't let my husband eat or do some things that I can't (pregnant, too) but we know it's becuase he's trying to "share my pain". Otherwise, if he wanted to go out, I'd say it wasn't fair that I couldn't and own up to being jealous, but in the end would say I'd be ok if he went but didn't want him to stay for long or do it frequently.
2007-04-07 07:11:12 · answer #2 · answered by throughthebackyards 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't really stop him, per se, from doing that, but you don't have to put up with it either.
I have a suggestion: Go to your county court house's website and click on "Friend of the Court" section. A lot of times it will have an online document that's called "Friend of the Court Handbook."
In this handbook (and if it's not in the handbook there'll probably be a link in there somewhere that will lead you to it), there will be tables that will state what Friend of The Court recommends a noncustodial parent pay a custodial parent based on his/her income every month, if two parties are involved in divorce proceedings.
Print out the handbook, print out the income tables, highlight in yellow where your spouses income falls, and leave it on someplace where he can find it when his selfish a$$ stumbles through the door.
You can even attach a little handwritten love note that says something to the effect of: "Grow up and knock off the bull$hit, or pretty soon you'll not only be out a wife and a kid, but at least this much money every month for the next 18 years."
2007-04-07 07:13:20 · answer #3 · answered by biiiiaaach 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My husband does that occasionally with his friends, but I would rather him stay at a buddies house than drive drunk, or if they have a dd, then I would still rather he crash at their place, because he smells like beer and when I was pregnant, ugh, I hated that. If it was planned that he comes home and he doesn't then he has issues to deal with, usually me making his life miserable the next day, thats when we have so many chores we have to do...get the picture...plus remember, thats just one night out with my friends he owes me, and trust me I keep count. We can't always get a sitter & go out together, makes life easier to trade off nights out with our friends. I trust him, I married him, he knows he can trust me as well. It works for us.
2007-04-07 07:05:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I think you need to check in on hubbies activities? Is it fair for him to have time out, when your at home pregnant. what if something, god forbid, something terrible happenend, like bracks and hicks contractions, what would happend then, can you get ahold of him? would he answer and be beside you? These are all questions, that need to be answered, and he needs to step up to the plate and become a responsible father. Not this" I need my time types" Very child like behavior. Time to sit down with him and discuss things. I think a reality check for him is in order.
2007-04-07 07:24:36 · answer #5 · answered by Cindybear 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah about that why is it that when a guy gets a girl pg that he can go out and play? he thinks that will take care of the together time? they are nuts we still need compassion so we don't feel so alone and scared being pg what if something happens when he is away to play those guys need to grow up i'd say.
2007-04-07 07:02:56 · answer #6 · answered by bustnloose_2000 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I let my husband. It's all baout trust. I let him go out and blow off steam with his buddies and sometimes he has a few to many and I would rather have him stay at his friends than drive and risk a DUI or killing himself or someone else.
2007-04-07 07:02:06 · answer #7 · answered by sunnydreams1123 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well it's not like you can chain him to the bed to make him stay so it would kind of be out of my hands.
I'd tell him how I felt about him going out all night and if he still left the i would be pretty mad.
i wouldnt do anything but give him a piece of my mind.
good luck
2007-04-07 07:02:56 · answer #8 · answered by lady_luv 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That would seem to indicate a serious problem in your marriage, either because of his action or because of yours. Talk to your pastor, priest or rabbi for guidance. Then talk to hubby. Be careful not to accuse or nag or raise your voice, just simply state the problem unemotionally and ask for his help in solving it.
This will take work by both of you.
Good Luck
2007-04-07 07:02:30 · answer #9 · answered by snvffy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I wouldnt even if I wasnt pregnant. I would talk to him and let him know i didnt like it and see if we could come to an agreement.
2007-04-07 07:00:42 · answer #10 · answered by vn 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋