Know someone who might know where Bin Laden is?

Question

"I am bound, you are bound, to everyone on this planet by a trail of six people"

-Stockard Channing, from the film 6 Degrees of Separation.

I'm a bit peeved that Osama Bin Laden and Ayman Al-Zawahiri are still on the loose. I was thinking (perhaps naively) we could test the "6 degrees" hypothesis on those guys.

So if you know someone who might know someone who might know where they're at, drop the name (and preferably an email) and then we're just 5 steps away.

I promise to share any reward in fair proportion to solid leads.

Answer 1

I can tell you one person who definitely knows where Bin Laden is. Bin Laden knows where Bin Laden is.

Answer 2

Bush probably knows exactly where Osama is. The Bush family and the Bin Laden clan have longstanding relationships of cooperation and shared business interests.

The Bin Ladens are a very large and very rich family with many international connections and I cannot believe they remain ignorant of where their dear Osama is.

Somebody makes sure that the sick Osama gets the medical care he needs, and some pipeline gets the family's money flowing his way. Saudi Arabians are intensely loyal to their family members.

But it would be a disaster for Bush if Osama were captured alive. First of all, the proud Saudi Arabian family would be humiliated, and bear in mind that they are Bush's longtime buddies and Bush cannot wish to hurt them.

Captured alive, Osama would be brought to trial and testimony in court before a worldwide audience would bring out facts about Bush's career which would be devastatingly embarrassing.

Otherwise, Osama could be killed, but that would be a loss for Bush. Osama kept alive is a useful target to give the American people something to hate. Every dictator creates the image of an enemy to focus the attention of the people on foreign adventures instead of noticing the corruption and decline if domestic society.

Thus, Fidel Castro is empowered by constantly harping on the threat of the Yanquis. Adolf Hitler made good use of the Jews as his enemy to blame. A live Osama Bin Laden is useful for the Bush regime, and I have even seen dartboards where Americans can throw darts at a picture of this feared and hated foe.

Answer 3

I think that Osama is in Qom, Iran, the same place as Iran's Supreme's Leader Sayyid Ali Khamenei. Remember Osama wants to bridge the gap between Sunni and Shia. The US has some control over the Musharraf government in Pakistan but not over Iran. That makes Iran the safest place for Osama. Qom and Mashad have important Muslim shrines so they are the safest cities in Iran for Osama. The Wali al Asr was hidden at Masjid Jamkaran in Qom. It would be the perfect place for Osama.

Even if the US or its allies take military action against the underground nuclear research facility at Natanz, the heavy water nuclear facility at Arak and the nuclear power plant at Bushehr, there will be no attack against the holy shrines in Qom and Mashad.

Answer 4

I would assume that Osama is in Russia. Russian special services most likely captured him with the help of their agents in Afghanistan. They use him for issuing "statements" at the times when Russians need to influence Middle Eastern politics.

Answer 5

NO ONE WILL FIND ME! NO ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!