i tried to defend myself about something that my husband accused me of doing. but he didn't wanna listen to me, so raise my voice up. my son was there. so he asked me to leave the house.
2007-04-07 05:57:13 · 17 answers · asked by vic 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No. Your 15 year old son can't witness an argument? No.
Your husband is protecting his own ego, and using your son as a shield.
If your son is that sensitive, that he can't see mom yell, he will not be fit for the battles that life will present. He needs to understand adult emotions.
I think that your husband knew that you have a reason to be upset with him, and used that as an excuse to stifle you.
How can he ask you to leave the house? This man seems to have some control issues.
You are not evil. You are probably a wonderful and giving woman, who tolerates a lot in this life.
(OH excuse me ... I thought you said 15 YEAR old son) ...
You aren't evil but I would suggest not arguing around a child who can't understand what he is witnessing.
Your husband should have left the house himself. It is not his job to make you feel ashamed. If he needs some air, he can go get it.
2007-04-07 06:03:11 · answer #1 · answered by poweranni 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
According to your question, you are yelling because your husband does not "listen" to you. Does that mean you are not getting your point across? Or does that mean he is not agreeing with you and you raise your voice so you think he will see your side? Are these arguments that turn into "physical" discussions? If not, raising your voice does not equate making one's point. You can speak your point, not yell it. Emotions do play a factor here, which means you will have to learn how to control them. This will lead to the maturity to excuse yourself from in front of the child. Children should see disagreement, not arguing. Disagreement is healthy: without it there is no adversity. No adversity means people are not being real to themselves. But if you are going to "raise your voice", think about why you are doing it before you begin. That may help some. Good luck.
2007-04-07 13:48:34 · answer #2 · answered by swilson_lewis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should never fight in front of your children and I do not support your hubby for sending you out of the house I believe you should have just moved the discussion to another part of the house where it would not bother the baby.. I would however get to the bottom of this accusation because since your parents and all you should be caring about your child. More then getting jealous or making false accusations about
your wife.
God Bless and just talk rationally to each other no yelling
it makes most men just tune you out!
2007-04-07 13:03:22 · answer #3 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You shouldnt have to leave your house unless you're being harmful. Nobody should ever shout, but it happens sometimes. Most of all, you should never shout in front of the child. Arguments should be held away from the child no matter how old or young.
2007-04-07 13:56:14 · answer #4 · answered by throughthebackyards 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you're not evil, but you are human!
It is not healthy for your son, so consider it a lesson learned and save shouting for when he is not there.
As for your husband asking you to leave the house, this is not healthy for you son either! I hope you didn't do it!
2007-04-07 13:12:38 · answer #5 · answered by Stay Low 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason you ask this question is because this is something that is bothering you. It's very good that you are aware that yelling or fighting in front of your son is a bad example to set. We are all going to have disagreements with our partner from time to time but in my opinion you should never fight in front of a child. This answer comes from personal experience. My parents had a troubled marriage. They did fight in front of me and my brother. I can't speak for my brother but I think it's made me a more insecure adult.
2007-04-07 13:13:53 · answer #6 · answered by seashell 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children learn what they live.
If that is behavior you want your kid to exhibit keep right on.
The reality is it will take a LOT more than a couple of times for this to scar a child.
Children do not remember things from 6 years old much less
15 months.
What they do learn though is your method of conflict resolution, or lack of one, which stays with them forever.
Learn how to disagree without losing it.
To think that you will raise a kid to 18 years old without having a marital argument in their presence is unrealistic.
YOU need to learn how to resolve disagreements before you can give them that example.
2007-04-07 13:06:12 · answer #7 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there are raised voices which wont do you child any harm and there is vicious arguments that will,,people fight,fact,,the way you choose to do it is up to you and your husband,take it elsewhere or make the time later but children need to see mum and dad acting like a married couple and couples argue sometimes,children learn from their parents and if a child never sees normal confrontation they will never know how best to deal with it,,,use your wisdom to choose which is a normal spat and which is for only you and your hubby to see!
2007-04-07 13:16:35 · answer #8 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yelling in anger is natural, he should never have made you leave!
You SHOULD try not to yell around a child--it not only frightens them, but eventually teaches them that behavior is acceptable.
If your husband acted accusatory & then made you leave, I'd be taking a long hard look at him, because he seems controlling & uncaring!
2007-04-07 13:02:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your child understands very little English, so why did you feel the need to raise your voice?
Next time, put JR in another room, and you guys go fight elsewhere.
2007-04-07 13:14:18 · answer #10 · answered by Ella 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋