I have caused problems in the marriage, but I usually am not the one to point it out. My wife has always had divorce on the tip of her tongue when trying to get through to me. I wanted to know how other people's relationships end. Do the women usually suggest the divorce? Or is it a mutual thing, or even is the man just tired and wants to get out? And if my wife wanted a divorce, is it right that I lay down and agree, or is it a test?
2007-04-07 05:44:03 · 11 answers · asked by Pachinko Machine 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I guess I am asking a statistical question, do most marriages end because of the man or woman, who is generally the one that ends it?
2007-04-07 05:52:43 · update #1
The unhappy one usually...
but really depending on how long you two have been together if you're having so many ups and downs that the word divorce flies freely from both of your tongues then you had better get serious and look at where that's coming from? Really ask yourself if your life as it is now with your partner is enough? Is it all you had expected out of marriage? If not ask yourself what's missing, and if you love her and she loves you Work on it!! I've come to learn after 10 years of marriage this April, that even the best couples, once married it requires you to give 100% and for you to also receive 100% from your partner. If you know you are giving all you can to the marriage, then most likely it's not you pushing to get out of it. Unless you're tired of waiting for the other to plug in to the relationship and put forth the same efforts you have been in order to make one one another happy. It's hard when your the one going through all of it but really only you can answer the question I think you're really asking... "Should you leave, or not"
"GOOD LUCK!!!!!
2007-04-07 06:06:06 · answer #1 · answered by truepassion76 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is uauslly the one that is not happy in the marriage anymore or has been hurt by the other person. Or in some cases it becomes a mutual agreement. Really though divorce should never be threatened unless they intend to follow through it just damages anything you guys have worked hard to keep together. I would say sometimes women test us guys to see if we will fight for the marriage because it shows how much you still care for them and the relationship. Sometimes it is best to let a person go as well because if they are miserable they will just bring you down to there level and it just makes the whole marriage unbearable!
I hope this answers your question divorce in my books is the last resort and you better have a very good reason to end the relationship. Remember marriage is under the eyes of God and well he doe's not approve of divorce and he makes your final judgement in the end.
God Bless and Best Wishes.
2007-04-07 05:55:40 · answer #2 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Statistically, woman usually end up initiating the divorce. Have you and your wife gone to marriage counselling? If not, why? Do you not want to try and heal the relationship, or would you rather spend a fortune on a lawyer? I understand however it is a two way street, and your wife, may not be willing to try. These are only suggestions, and I wish you all the best, take care.
2007-04-07 06:15:39 · answer #3 · answered by Cindybear 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Statistically I've read in multiple sources that 75% of divorces are initiated by the woman (I'm part o the 25% however). I don't think from a process perspective it much matters, however. If your wife threatens you with divorce, and enough is enough, just once CALMLY state, "OK, I'll contact my lawyer tomorrow and get the proces started" and leave the room. Best of luck to you - divorce can be a huge PITA. There are lots of good books out there. Divorce and New Beginnings I thought was pretty good - covered most aspects, from legal to kids, to recovering to starting a new life. I wish you the best.
2007-04-07 07:00:55 · answer #4 · answered by J D Jr. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you both need to work on the means to get to each other. You should stop causing problems, talk to your wife and tell her that that is not a way to get to you. Everyone have problems in their married life, there isn't a 'perfect' marriage. You should not let your wife take your marriage so lightly, or even stand up for yourself and make a decision on what you know and mostly what you want. It is, after all your decision, the statistics will not help you decide. It looks to me like you are afraid to admit to yourself what you want.
2007-04-07 06:11:40 · answer #5 · answered by Accalia R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Out of all the divorced people I know, it is usually the woman who instigates the divorce. I know of only one case where the man has divorced his wife. And even then, the situation ins't straight forward.
2007-04-07 05:57:09 · answer #6 · answered by True Blue Brit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two need to see a professional counselor before you really do end up in divorce court!Obviously,you both have issues the other isn't addressing and you both are hurting the 'other guy' because you are hurt or want to control.She is trying to control you with threats and you are trying to control her by 'causing problems'.It's your choice....take the easy way out and get divorced,or be a man ,try to keep your word you gave when you married her and seek professional help!
2007-04-07 05:54:43 · answer #7 · answered by Coffeeman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your wife always uses divorce as a means to get through to you, then you obviously don't take your marriage very seriously.
Question is, do you or don't you want to be married?
Either party can initiate the divorce.
2007-04-07 05:48:46 · answer #8 · answered by Ella 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should find out the problem and work things out, your wife tells you these things because you may not be listening to her or not paying attention or you just don't want to work on anything.
2007-04-07 05:53:44 · answer #9 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the one who didn't do anything, usually instigates the divorce first, but i guess because of tht in can be either one
2007-04-07 05:57:07 · answer #10 · answered by island girl!! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋