what can i do to make them believe I'm not a skitso/serial killer?

Question

i recently decided to get help bc i am a cutter. i made the mistake of telling my family about it and they called me everything under the sun, which made me feel even worse about myself. I have gathered information, i have told them in my own words and i have made them watch programs and yet the still insist that i'm just crazy and stupid and that i need to be locked away for life. Is there anything else i can do that will convince them that just bc i cut doesnt mean that i'm a skitso/serial killer?

i have been cutting since i was 12 and i am now 21. my family said they had never seen the scars before and couldnot understand why i was doing it now. I am going to get help, have already made an appointment, but every time i talk to one of my family members they just make me feel worse. i love my family and would do anything for them, but i just cant take it any more

Answer 1

I'm going to just be frank with you. first, your family seems very judgemental, and if they were compassionate at all they would try to understand why it is that your cutting. Now with that said, there has to be something wrong with how your feeling about yourself, and you do need to get help for it. That doesn't mean you need to be locked away. Just finding someone to talk to and to spill yourself to on a regular basis can be enough to get you out of this. Someone like a close friend or even a psychiatrist. But it has to be someone who you know will be sympathetic, loving, non-judgemental and understanding. The fact that your family is acting like that says that there is something wrong with them. Maybe they're just scared to dig into something that makes them feel uncomfortable, is your family not very open with showing each other how they feel? Do you guys ever show one another that you love eachother by saying it or just by showing it in some way.
Anyways, just know this. Evreybody is crazy in one way or another. Some people are just better at hiding it then others. And other people as they get older are really able to get a hold of whatever it is that drives them crazy and actually turn it around to something that maybe even ends up benefitting them. In my experience it is primarily the people that look to God to help them through the insanity that plagues everyone in this world. Those are the people that by the end of their life have a smile on their face.
Lots of people cut, you're not necessarily skitso or a crazy serial killer - but if you're honest with yourself you should be able to tell yourself how serious this really is. Either way, cutting is a sign that to some extent you need to get some help. Good Luck, I'll pray for you.

Answer 2

It's so hard for people to understand what cutting is about. Give them some time. You've already done what I would have suggested so just stand back and give them time. There are many famous people who were/are cutters. Johnny Depp admitted to being a cutter and it's less common in men. It would really help both your family and you if you had a counselor or therapist to talk to. See if you can find someone who can help you deal with problem and your families reaction to it. Most if not all of them will come around eventually. My niece was cutting when she was in high school but she's doing much better now so there is hope. Maybe your family needs to hear that part of it. It's not permanent and you can manage to get through it given time and understanding. Good luck and take care of yourself.

Answer 3

Just continue with what you are doing. If you are seeing a school counseler that is cool. Just because you had cut yourself does not make you an evil and bad person. Don't listen to your parents, you don't need to be locked up, just look back on your past and realize that you knew what you were doing was wrong and you fixed it. That is not the way a skitso/serial killer acts.
Good luck with your parents.~*

Answer 4

...this is very interesting.

i don't mean to dismiss it as untrue. but are you speaking for yourself or another or is it a hypothetical.?

if this is true. you are a confused young lady and are in a state of uncommon denial. i would even suggest that it be the reason you cut your self. to remind your self of some tragic now subconscious realization.

write me....**edit**...oh ok...you are getting help. please be receptive to help but also some selective. and write me if you need an other ear.

i want to help.

i believe you are not a schizophrenic or a serial killer...but you can't go on cutting yourself and you need to remember/realize why you are doing this.

please respond....i would like to know that you are listening.

**edit** ... thank you for further response lovebug. you are doing the right thing seeking help. i would like you to realize however that understanding why you are doing this and from such an early age may now be difficult to comprehend. it is quite possible that whatever your reason(s) may be...may not be only or all. may not be correct whatsoever. since for 9 years you will have been rationalizing irrational choices.

it won't be easy for family members to comprehend either since this type of personal behaviour is usually blurred by complications of self and human (family) relationships.

i am trying to say that your choice to inflict self-wounds is a choice made from personal pain for the purpose to realize something. and that something may be sought by you or other(s) to place responsibility(ies) elsewhere. this is where you need to be carefull how a counsellor remediates. see what i mean..?

but don't worry. all reasons point back to personal acceptance. which you will now or future be sure to realize.

i certainly wish you well and admire your courage.

would like to know how you progress...but at your own willingness of course.

love all ways and...


be well

Answer 5

Depending upon your age, bedwetting is actually a stronger sign of a serial killer than cutting is (bedwetting is related to poor impulse control while cutting/self-mutilation is more related to poor self-esteem.)

Serial killers, for the most part, manifest their abnormalities outwardly or externally, not internally. A serial killer is more likely to cut up their sister's (or friend's) dolls than they are to cut up their own arm.

That being said, telling someone who is psychologically ignorant (and that includes some professionals, sad to say) is a learning experience best made peace with. Most likely, they have had little dealings with the nuance and intricacies of mental illness, and thus get most of what they know from tv and movies (horrible places to learn about anything, but especially psychology.) They also can't be 'helped' because the idea in their mind is the one THEY are most comfortable with, which sounds like it could be part of what is contributing to the need to cut yourself. It can be considered on par with a suicide who rationalizes that their 'suicide' will somehow speak for them in a way they can't.

The truth is, it usually doesn't. Suicide, or cutting, doesn't make the person hear you any better (personal experience in that regard.) The best advice is to concentrate less on what will convince them and concentrate more on what will alleviate the need within you to cut yourself. I was lucky, in that it only took one incident (using an exacto knife on my bicep) and one relating of it to 'satisfy' the need. Also, I still have three small 'scars' that I can look at to remind myself that the experience (and the pain involved) was something significant to me. Maybe you could try pro-actively taking charge of the situation and getting a piercing or a tatoo instead. One can subvert the need for cutting by finding a more conventional (and thus acceptable) way of displaying 'scars' that not only one can look at constantly but also invite discussion. Your scars are a way to communicate, and knifing yourself isn't the only way in which your body can speak for you.

Answer 6

Ah. I know how you feel. My mom is a total spaz in the same way. I couldn't even tell her I was sick with a cold without her becoming inexplicably pissed off and blaming it on me.

So, in the position you're in now (with, presumably, a few years to go before you'll be able to get out of the house and go to college), I advise you to not even waste your energy on it. People are extremely difficult to change - even parents. It's the same with romantic relationships. Realize your parents' shortcomings and acknowledge that they're being crappy, but consider that they know not what they do. And move on - don't take it to heart. My mother was the nastiest ****** to me as a teenager (and I was valedictorian of my high school class). The only thing that made our relationship better was my moving far away.

So bide your time. Get out of the house as much as possible - walk, go to a park and swing on the swingset, read at the library. Find consolation in things you like to do: reading or art or exercising. Keep a journal. It'll give you a great place to vent. Reading and writing kept me sane in my parents' house.

Answer 7

hi! there are one of those, many varieties of affection. As with something you need to understand the product; what it is going to and could no longer do, and it really is means for harm. As with something that's probably risky to the consumer, coaching is needed. even as sharing this merchandise, both activities ought to agree on and understand the style the different will be sharing. without compatibility; threat is truly authentic, and infrequently lasting harm can outcome.numerous sorts of affection are almost benign, as contained in the love of a be sure for a toddler. inspite of one of those affection, allergic reaction has got here about. even as sharing this merchandise with yet another human being, -as in *ROMANTIC LOVE- that's fairly mandatory to understand the emblem the different individual has and could be making use of/sharing. Incompatible "products" will be risky to both activities emotional wellbeing, and would bring about everlasting scaring. continuously examine THE LABEL intently before USE. ~ each and each and every time. ~ (This product is concept for use on the only discretion of the possessor. No criminal duty will be commonplace via the giver.) *Use severe caution. relaxing Q. thanks. }:>

Answer 8

You are definitely not a schizo because people suffering from schizophrenia have severed their ties with reality and are in a delusional/hallucinatory state. Your own tendency to hurt yourself might be coming from a childhood trauma or unconscious desire to inflict pain, technically termed masochism. First, you must acknowledge the fact that you need help to find the root of this desire and make your family understand it. Do not aggravate matter by fighting because the more you appear violent, the more they'll insist that you are crazy. Help yourself and understand yourself first. =D

Answer 9

Uh...seriously I wouldn't waste your energy trying to convince them of anything. They obviously are not interested in your getting better.

take that energy and help yourself....and move, as soon as possible.

good luck

Answer 10

Just be yourself..continue what your doing..Sometime in their life, soon they will realize that you are not what they are thinking of.