What do you do when you feel left out at work?

Question

I have been working at my job for 2-1/2 years. I really love what I do and I like the people I work with. (I work part time - mornings 8 -12:30pm). I consider myself a happy consistent person - and think that I am friendly, personable and treat everyone the same way. I am a good listener and will ask people how their day is going, about their families, weekends, vacations,etc.. It is rarely reciprocated. I am discouraged because I feel like I am merely tolerated ...Does anyone know this feeling? How do you hande it? Thanks!

To answer poster #1 - I know what you mean - I am not about sharing details of my personal life at work - but it's about fitting in and feeling accepted by your coworkers.

Answer 1

The real question is do you like this job? Have you out grown this job? Should you be looking for a another job with a better fit?
Find your friendships outside of work by:
Take college course and join a clubs
Join a professional association, professional job club such as Experiences Unlimited
Craigslist Groups
Young Professional organizations
Join a local gym with cool classes

And forget the workplace loosers!

Answer 2

No this is not a social event but it is a place that does not need to seem unhappy. But 2.5 years and you still do not fit in. It is normal to take a couple months to get in the groove with how everyone else is and how they do things. Do others get responses when the ask how others days and family are? If so (not saying that it is not) do you think that the others that you are speaking of feel that your job is meaningful? Do a few of the others go out and eat lunch together or anything? If they do and you join in they may start to be more friendly when they get to know you other than at work. But be yourself and do not try to hard. Don't but into conversations but try to speak more to the others. The more you speak the easier it gets to talk about other things so try and start a few talks up.

Answer 3

LOL - l am a single person office, an executive assistant.

Maybe it seems you are trying too hard? Back off a little and be enigmatic about your own plans...maybe they will start to ask if you drop interesting hints very sparingly. That's actually what did it for me at the last job I had where I worked with a big group. They were a cliquish group and because I didn't say much, but had interesting places to go after work, or on weekends, (would come in with interesting jewelry or garments, or shopping bag from clothes shopping at lunch) they started asking questions and opening the conversation after a while.

Answer 4

Do not try so hard, just stick to the basics. Maybe the people you work with are just rude people. I know a lady I work with is like that. I just recently started a new job and I would come in each morning and greet everyone. At first I got no response, but after a month or so people got used to me and now greet me back. But some of the ladies are still rude about it.

Good Luck and try not to let it get to you! They may just be jealous about your schedule.

Answer 5

They may be a little wary because you are a part time worker even though you have been there 2.5 years, and they don't know you that well and don't want to make the effort.
I used to work as a temp worker and got the same response.
People are funny that way sometimes.

Answer 6

I'd just get over it. Sometimes part timers, temps, freelancers are a little too upbeat for the full timers who slave away and are 100% "committed" (I use that term loosely, as many part timers, etc. are actually more productive!). If you don't groove with the people, it really doesn't matter!

Answer 7

What - is this a job or a social event?