Does anyone out there not really care for your inlaws? It could be any inlaw as in mom, dad, bro or sis law.?

Question

Do you just tolerate them to keep the peace? What is it about them that gets on your nerves? For example-maybe controlling, or nosey, or selfish or what?

Answer 1

Don't really like any of them, they're ok for a very short period of time occasionally. When my mom-in-law comes over, she brings tons of crap with her like different strange foods and leaves them in plastic grocery bags all over the kitchen counters, etc. She'll bring over canned salmon because she knows the smell of it makes me sick and will cook it if I'm working late and it stinks up the whole house. Her mom is a frail diabetic who walks with a cane and has bilateral hearing aids, but she can hear everything we say when she's 3 rooms away, and will literally "run" you over if she hears the theme song to the Price is right on tv. One time I came home and she had completely gone through my personal belongings in my bedroom and constantly asks what we spent for various items. The siblings-in law aren't much better. One of my bro in laws is always trying to get handsy with me and says very sexual things to me and steals. My sis-in-law is totally psycho, and has been married 2 x and impregnated 2x with ppl she was having affairs with. Holiday dinners are a nightmare. They belch and pass gas at the table and eat like pigs, I'm totally amazed that my husband came from this family. He doesn't like spending any more time with them than I do but can never say no. When his mom and grandma come to visit for a few days, it turns into a few weeks and they moan and groan the whole time. The last time they were here, my mom-in-law "missplaced" my works cited page for a research paper along with homework due at the end of the semester that needed to be handed in all at once, we never have found it and it's been 5-6mos. Whenever I see their names on the caller ID, I just turn the phone off and delete them off the memory. If they really want to talk to my hubby, they can call him at work. I could go on for hours about these ppl.

Answer 2

Oh, you had to get me started didn't you? I've been married for 16 months, and the entire time I've been living with my husband, his parents and his sister. I love his dad, we get along great. He and his dad are two of a kind, both chilled out and even tempered. But I have never hated anyone the way I hate my mother-in-law. She almost died 5 times since my hubby was born. She had a stroke when he was born, a heart attack a year later, and another heart attack 7 years ago. She was massively overweight and drowning in her own body fluids so she had gastric bypass surgery 2 years ago, and went into cardiac arrest during the procedure. Then (6 months ago) she fainted because her heart was only beating 50 times a minute and had a pace maker put in. I know I shouldn't hate her because she obviously doesn't have a lot of time left, but she is the most vile woman I've ever known. She's old and wrinkly, and her term of endearment for me is "***** face." I haven't had the chance to be a wife yet because she does everything for my husband, and if I try she'll look over my shoulder and comment. She stresses herself out on a daily basis, blows everything out of proportion and screams until she makes herself cry. And everyone ignores her because they don't want to put her in her place, but still have to see her every day. She's healthy now, healthy enough to go to bingo every day, and bowling every weekend, but not enough to get a job and help pay for "her" house. That's another thing, she thinks that everything we do is her business, and everything in the house is hers to use. I swear, I cann't wait till she's feeble enough to put in a home, no one will ever hear from her again.

Answer 3

it would be very difficult not to be involve with your inlaws. The act of marriage means you are marrying also your inlaws. As a part of the family they will be involved in your life.
The best way to deal with this is to be explicit as up to what extent and aspect of your married life they can be involved. Putting the message across explicitly will give them a signal that you mean business!
Tolerating them to be nosey will ultimately cause more and more problems.

Answer 4

I tolerate my sister-in-laws only for the simple fact that my husband only has his sisters and mother left so for the sake of keeping the peace I cope. The thing with his sisters that gets on my nerves is that they like to know about every arguement we have which gets on my nerves. The only reason they want to know is so they can try to convince him that I wasn't the woman he should have married. But we have proved them wrong for the last 6 years.

Answer 5

I cant stand them! They are nosy, fake, selfish, etc! But FAKE for the most part. They get on my LAST nerves....and I only tolerate it to keep the peace, yes...but there is only so much I can take. I'm to the point where someone is going to have to make a decision or I'm out! DONE!

Answer 6

When you marry that usually gives you a lot more people in your world, called the in-laws. Like all people , we like some more then others. I have some I love dearly, a few I tolerate and a couple I can't even tolerate. Buttt, a few probally have the same thoughts about me.

Answer 7

It's particularly my husband's mother and father, and his brothers. They are pretty much all that you listed with the nosey, etc. His mother didn't like me from the beginning of our relationship. She never said anything to my face, but she would say things to other family members, then they would tell me.
My husband just wanted peace, but after we got married and his mom tried to break us up, my hubby told his mother that she needed to keep the peace if she wanted to continue to have a with him, that she needed to get over herself, and that she was not welcome in our home until she made things right between me and her.
She has done that, but since all of this has happened, I speak my mind about anything now. If I don't like anything that any of them says, I say that I don't like it, instead of keeping silent. I want peace too, but since my husband stood up, I am not going to allow myself to get run over anymore.

If my husband had not stepped in first, I would be seen as the problem, like the woman just looking to start something.

Answer 8

Some in-laws are much better than others. Most are a pain. Yes, they are intrusive, try to break up your marriage if they can't have your spouses full undivided attention and some are just plain crazy. Some are good though.

Answer 9

I have tolerance for my fiance's mother because she is respectful to me, although she and I don't see eye to eye on several issues and she tends to think her son should still be doing what she wants.

I honestly don't like my fiance's father because he is obnoxious and confrontational. He is controlling and preaches about how everyone should be, including his son. He thinks men are superior to women and that children should be whipped. He thinks younger people have less say and should bow down to their elders.

My fiance knows how I feel but I tolerate them to keep the peace. I know my family is no picnic for him either, although they don't preach to him.

Answer 10

I cant say that I don't like my husbands siblings, I just don't know them very well. We never hear from them unless they need something. One of his sisters has only been to our house like 3 times since we got married, and she stopped by a few weeks ago to ask to borrow money. I just feel that family should be close, not just when they need something.