How do I recover from a bad "first sex" episode with a date whom I really loved. And I know she loved me too. She was experienced and I was novice and I unintentionally hurt her when we were having (attempting) sex. I did not mean disrespect but was silly, which just ticked her. Yes it was my mistake. I really miss her.
Anyway what I am looking is
1. Should I ask for forgiveness from her, will this soothe me at all ? Will it help her ?
2. Should I further communicate her and try to explain and get on ?
2007-04-06 11:53:57 · 7 answers · asked by pat_simon81 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
I'm thinking that even if the episode was as you say, your fault, she might be feeling rather embarrased herself which is why she was ticked off.
I don't think there is anything to be lost in approaching her and apologizing, telling her (if she didn't already know) that you are not experienced, you blame yourself for what happened and that you really miss her. If she does love you, then she will probably be willing to see you again. If not... then perhaps her feelings were not as strong as you thought to begin with.
2007-04-06 12:10:29 · answer #1 · answered by K 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It'll sting for a while but, you'll get over it. By the time you're 30 you'll laugh about it. New experiences that are so intimate are always embarrassing and uncomfortable. That's why you were being silly. You felt self concious and you were probably a little afraid that you wouldn't get it right. Perhaps you should wait until you are truly READY for this experience. Having sex just because everyone else is and because you're male is not the way to go.
You might want to tell her you're sorry and that you were uncomfortable since this was your first attempt. This girl may have been ticked because she thought you were laughing at HER. Assure her that she is a beautiful, smart and wonderful person. Find a level headed older male you can trust and confide in him with your situation.
2007-04-06 12:11:13 · answer #2 · answered by mpgs324 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Rarely is 'first' time sex great or even second, third etc. It is the most intimate act we humans do with each other and to get it mutually satisfying for both people takes practice. You said that the female was experienced perhaps only in the fact she has had sex with experienced male/s. If this is the case then she would not 'know' how to assist you or herself via positioning, relaxation etc.
If she has not made contact with you since this episode it would appear to me she may not want to see you again. However, if you feel you need to make contact and explain things from your side then that is your decision. Remember she may not want any contact and may hurt your feelings. Do not take other people's upset words as truth as they are looking after their feelings only in situations like this.
Do not let this experience trouble you as it is not that uncommon as I said for the first time.
2007-04-06 12:15:56 · answer #3 · answered by sag_kat2chat 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she's not able to forgive your bumbling during your first sexual encounter, then it wasn't really love. Playfulness during sex is often one of the best things about it - and is certainly needed for any two people who want to be able to get along in bed.
You shouldn't need to ask for forgiveness...simply saying you didn't mean to hurt her should be enough.
If she's not communicating with you now, she's not worth it. Any woman who would stop talking to her man just because sex wasn't perfect is a fool, and will probably spend the rest of her life lonely!! Sex is really only perfect in movies, and that's only because they have already edited out the other parts!
2007-04-06 12:05:41 · answer #4 · answered by abfabmom1 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are in love you should be talking this over with her, b/c when 2 people love one another, they can talk about anything. I say give her a call and tell her exactly what you tried to describe to us. If she is not up for it then love was one sided and you need to move on.
2007-04-06 14:08:55 · answer #5 · answered by tcconssw 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Solution: Tell her the truth only; what you feel and your fears.
2007-04-06 16:40:02 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you and your "date" were in love this wouldn't even be a problem. forget about her. move on with your life.
2007-04-06 12:02:14 · answer #7 · answered by Decoy 2.0 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋