Is it too bad to have affairs? is it an anomaly to stop loving the person you made a family with? is it actually avoidable?
if so it is true that a lover is guilty for allowing a cheater husband committing adultery, why at the end he just gets back home while the lover is the villain here??? If it is the other way around, a cheater wife, most likely she will be punished or pointed at, the male lover will walk away almost with no charges as it is "his nature".
Does this makes sense or am I just talking from my very own perspective. Isn't this a gender issue also?
I agree that women should help each other, therefore not to allow cheating would be a good thing. I experienced it myself and doubt I will ever do that again.But is this a reality? should this be a rule or we just have prejudices and marriage itself is just wrong!?...
To my very weird (evil if you want) understanding, there are no victims here, no villains, and no innocent bystanders. Only "lovers", with all the responsibility the word implies.Any thoughts without prejudice here?
I know this question implies rocks coming my way, hope you answer without prejudice and a lot of honest thought.
2007-04-06 05:44:55 · 5 answers · asked by Acuarela 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My EX husband had an affair with a good friend of mine who was also married. I think it's disgusting that people who say they care about you can be the most hurtful. I had no idea he was unhappy. It sure would have saved me a lot of heartache if one of them would have clued me in.
If you take vows of marriage and become dissatisfied with that person, do them and yourself a favor and be honest with them!
I saw both of them as the villian- but mostly him. I would have loved to catch them at it!
2007-04-06 05:55:36 · answer #1 · answered by heather 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Only the people w/in the home can wreck the home.... If someone cheats the marriage was already over anyway when it gets to that point. People make mistakes when it comes to other lives but I don't think anyone does it intentionally. When its over you have to be honest w/ yourself... Don't stay for the kids . Thats not why you married. There is something to be said for the partys involved they r all at fault but thats not why marriages dissolve. If you try afterwards to make it work .. well, it usually doesn't . The trust is broken when married . Its different when dateing but not w/ marriage. Its not a gender issue ,b/c both genders do it. Like I said before , usually something set off the act of cheating & mostly more than 1 thing. . Theres nothing wrong w/ marriage but it is very hard to keep a good one. 2 people really have to want it,.to keep it together. The partys walking away .,noones better than the other. rarely is it a sex issue as to why your spouse cheats . You can be a total DIVA in the sack but he'll go if something eles is wrong . Its a question of heart & boundaries. and yes alot of times they really r lovers. You can't stop that... it just happens. Noone is ever innocent none of the 4 or 3 o 2 or whatever!! Something dies when the person u love leaves u for someone eles. Sometimes you can get that back ....sometimes not....... In the end people will judge you if you stay . they will wonder how you can do it. You can't care what others say ya just have to do w/ what u r willing to live w/ & staying is not easy... but then again leaving leaves you w/ more dignity in your OWN mind.{Not in the mind of others!}
2007-04-06 06:14:38 · answer #2 · answered by lilly l 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm not quite clear on everything you're saying her but i definitely don't think there are no innocent bystanders. what about the children who see their parents getting hurt? and what about the people who have no idea that they're spouse is cheating and in NO way encourage it or at fault? you don't ask to be cheated on! i think home wreckers are disgusting and so are the cheaters. and if you ask me there should be no gender issues because cheating is cheating. someone always gets hurt and i don't think the hurt is any greater or any less because of a certain gender.
2007-04-06 05:50:52 · answer #3 · answered by JM 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
home is that warm relieved feeling when you walk in and it justs feels so comfortable and right. Home can be a quiet santuary state of mind you can go to when you feel troublesome and angry because it will always be there, having all the things you need : a family's love, and love. A home must have a family that cares for eachother for then it will be a place you can feel confortable to go there. It can be desirable because you need that love that a home gives you.
2016-05-18 21:31:47 · answer #4 · answered by brook 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
having an affair is BAD...
whoever does it, man, or woman
dont care
its wrong and bad
2007-04-06 05:50:03 · answer #5 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋