If your wife or girlfriend called you something truly vile in the heat of an argument, how would you feel?

Answer 1

Disappointed. I would feel disappointed because now the bar just got lower when you fight or argue. We all say things when we're angry that we regret, but the smart move would be to not let things get to that point. And if they do, the smartest thing for YOU to do is go for a walk or take a drive. Chances are whatever she says or whatever she throws will be your fault anyway! LOL! So take a walk before she gets to that point! (and then decide if that's somebody you seriously want to be with)

Answer 2

Reo, whenever there is an argument or heat one person ends up feeling that way only. What the other person has said though may not be completely true or false but may hold some ground, if given proper thought.

Had I faced such a situation I'd go to her when the clouds have cleared and ask her what she meant by that, the reason behind that and explain to her my position.

If she doesn't mean anything I'd simply forgive her for her behaviour and forget the issue. Moreover, tell her that I don't like such things even in heat. If even then she repeats it in future and doesn't mend her ways then she doesn't care for me and my feelings at all and may think of closing the chapter.

If at all I find myself at fault, I'd ask her for the time to let me improve so that in future she doesn't feel that I don't care for her words and feelings.

Answer 3

My husband and I have said some really nasty things in the heat of an argument, but we don't mean it. I am not saying this is right, as I know that we shouldn't intentionally hurt each other, but it happens with many other couples. We apologize, and usually end up forgetting all about it.

Answer 4

it depends.
lots of people say things the "don't mean" when they are angry. but you can't take them back and everyone knows that some part of you did mean it or it wouldn't have been said.
the best thing to do is learn how to communicate & argue better. i would think we needed better communication skills so there wouldn't be name calling in our arguments. i would study communication and arguing skills. like instead of
"you are a lazy jerk"
i might say
"i feel overwhelmed when i come home to dirty dishes because i have a need for rest after work"
try that crucial conversations book
or marshall rosenberg's nonviolent communications.
don't try to make the other person change
you can improve things by improving your own skills.
just try that and see if arguments get better.

Answer 5

words don't usually affect me...

but you can bet what she said was probably true...

the two times in life that people usually speak there mind is when they feel the have nothing else to lose (heat of battle) or when there drunk...

both which for some reason people try to rationalize by saying "oh it was the heat of the moment, she really didn't mean it" or "shes wasted...and she didn't even remember the next day, so all is good"....

NO...those are excuses!!! and what you should be looking for is reasons why they said what they said....

Answer 6

If it's in the heat of the arguement, it is unintentional.

She's hurt and trying to hurt you back even if it's something that she says that is not in her nature; she will regret it afterwards too.

I do that in the heat of an arguement with my boyfriend, it happens and you move on if the outcome of the arguement is good; the next day, if you two said something to make it up to each other you can forgive and forget and move on.

Answer 7

even though words can hurt worse then a slap in the face i say let her know how much it hurt u then move on sometimes we say things we don't really mean when we're mad it's just the heat of the moment she loves u and i'm sure she's alreadyfeeling bad for saying it try not to sweat the small stuff life is to short

Answer 8

It was something said out of anger, so take that into consideration.
If it's something that is being said repeatedly during heated arguments, then there's more to it.

Answer 9

Absolutely destroyed.

Those closest to you have the ability to unwittingly (or possibly intentionally) hurt you the most.

Learning to fight fair is one of the hardest skills to master in any good relationship. There are rules, and no matter HOW angry you are, you have to be aware of them.

Answer 10

I would feel terrible. That is why if I can't talk about it I don't, some things you just can't take back! Sorry doesn't fix it and neither does guilt so just don't go there.