Or is it acceptable to cheat when you're engaged?
2007-04-05 12:31:11 · 45 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is an interesting moral question. After considering it, I think it may even be *worse* for someone to cheat while engaged then after being married. Here's why:
Infidelity in marriage is a terrible thing that destroys trust, love, and sometimes lives (worse if there are children). However human weakness being what it is one can at least imagine a rational for how someone would get to that state. The marriage is on the rocks, there is great distance between husband and wife, maybe they have even reached the stage where the only communication is laced with anger and hurt. Then after all the stresses of marriage, one person gives in to temptation and has an affair. It's a terrible thing and hurts everyone involved, but at least you can see the warning signs.
On the other hand, someone who is engaged to be married having an affair really has no excuse at all. To make the promise that you're going to be committed to this person and try to make a real life with them, then to disrespect that vow so much that you cheat *even before the vow is made*, that shows how little a person who does this values love, committment, honesty, the other person's feelings, almost everything. It would be a huge red flag. If that person cheated and then went on to still get married, that would be even worse! Remember this is cheating 'at the drop of the hat', almost like poor impulse control, *before* any of the stresses and problems of marriage have even begun.
Just my thoughts.
2007-04-05 16:46:33 · answer #1 · answered by Jon S 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Any one man or woman that cheat r both NASTY!!!
If u want to go out of the relationship weather u r married or not U should find a person that like 3 somes or even swinging.. This way u don't cheat the only thing is u might get an STD...
2007-04-05 12:36:01 · answer #2 · answered by Natural 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A woman or man that cheat are not suppose to even be engaged. I think everyone in a relationship have commited to one another but tend to let themselves go forward without considering the person they are in a commited relationship with. Once a person cheats they WILL do it again. Especially if before marriage and you still marry them. You deserve better not all women are like that as men too. I think we are all so wanting to be loved that we tend to just put up with what ever we have infront of us. That is why I am SO picky. Make the decision based on you not what she'll say or do or whatever... you do not have to put up with it unless you just want to settle for that and not let a better chance opening the door.
Honestly,
Martie
2007-04-05 12:57:51 · answer #3 · answered by Martie S 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This isn't about WHEN she cheats it's about the fact that she DOES cheat.............which is unacceptable at any time, if a person cheats while engaged then they will while they're married.....engagement is a time when you're promised in marriage to another, all that's waiting to happen is that it's made public.
if the "rules" of being commited aren't followed then, when will they be, it gets slightly harder not easier afterall.
It's NEVER acceptable to cheat honey & it's NEVER acceptable to have to accept it either........
2007-04-05 13:09:59 · answer #4 · answered by Funky 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are in a relationship, it is unacceptable to cheat. In fact a person who is not married has no excuse whatsoever. They can easily get out of the relationship and pursue someone else if they want to. A married person (who would still be wrong if cheating) has a lot more complications if cheating.
2007-04-05 13:41:02 · answer #5 · answered by pixieri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes a person who cheats while they are engaged has no respect for their future spouse and will cheat again while married. It is never acceptable to cheat when you are in a serious relationship. (Or pretty much any relationship for that matter.)
2007-04-05 13:20:15 · answer #6 · answered by SchrodingersTigress 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
She is just as bad a cheat is a cheat no matter what. IF the guy knows she is cheating he needs to dump her ASAP she will only continue to do this when they marry. Obviously she is not ready for marriage or a commitment or she wont be cheating.
2007-04-05 12:35:16 · answer #7 · answered by bbinqueens33 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cheating is wrong regardless if your engaged or married. Your in a committed relationship to that 1 person. If your not ready to get married and be faithful, you shouldn't get married.
2007-04-05 13:02:15 · answer #8 · answered by Debbie L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating is bad no matter what state you are in, if you are going steady with someone you have a commitment to them, just as if you are married, only thing is, is that when you are married, you and your spouse are one before God, so you have a commitment to the Big Man Upstairs, as well as the one you are suppsed to love and cherish till death do you part, but cheating is just wrong!!
2007-04-05 12:47:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
cheating shows that you lack integrity, morals, loyalty. It shows that you are weak and selfish. I don't think it makes a difference if you are married or engaged. The only difference if is there are children at stake, then it's even worse because you are cheating on the kids as well.
2007-04-05 12:36:09 · answer #10 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋