what should I do if I am 7 months prenant and my husband is cheating?

Question

Tuesday night I borrowed his cell phone,which he protects with his life from me,if ever I borrow it he would remain around me so as soon as I'm done he can get it back,he always has it on vibrate,anyways tuesday he is working on a midnight to 8 am shift,so he was asleep around 10 when I tried to use his phone, while doing so a txt came in, it said "R u at work" I have never done this before only advised to try but I awnsered,in doing so back and forth I was convinced it was a female and not someone he works with because she agreed to call him midnight when he gets on shift.When I told her she was chatting with his wife she tried to pretend she had a wrong number but the number was stored in his phone so obviously he knows her.He said it was someone from work trying to get info but that doesnt make sense cause she agreed to call him way past working hours for her.

Answer 1

For starters? I would sit back with my child tucked away safely inside me floating in fluid and think "Is this the father I want for my child?
One who shows no respect to a woman's dignity?
One who while I'm carrying his child...conceived during one of the most intimate and personal acts two people can have to express their love with one another?
How will my child turn out with him here to raise him?
Or...Oh my God!..maybe "her"?
What will she think or turn out to be as an adult?

Maybe instead of asking for opinions here on line, I should wait until he comes home and confront him.
Will he deny it? Probably. But if I offer proof and catch him off guard, then his response, or lack of, will affirm my belief.

If he says...."well...you're not attractive anymore"...or..."you don't show me the affection/sex/whatever...I need". Then...guess what.

That's an admission of guilt. It's just worded differently and not as blunt as "yes".

So...try using some logic. Get your ducks all lined up in a row. If you have something to back up your suspicions, have them ready. Then...wait for the right moment. Asking when he's drunk will net you the truth. Guarenteed. Unless he's a violent and physically abusive drunk.
In which case the question really is...If that's the case why even stay now?

Answer 2

How sure are you that he is cheating. Remember you are pregnant and over emotional and likely to be assuming and presuming things that just are not there. Is he out every night, or is he home? Is he out ove weekends or is he home? I think you are likely to be over sensitive and because you feel you are in an uncompromising situation that he is doing this. I think you need to get the book "Love and Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs and to read it through slowly and carefully and to apply what is taught to you from that book. Most pregnant woman think the thoughts you are thinking and are a good 90% off the mark. I doubt he is doing that.

Answer 3

I am sorry about your situation. If you still love your husband and still wants to be with him, you should talk with him about the matter and ask why he has to cheat on you or seek family counseling. Make sure you find a good one before you start seeing him / her with your husband, otherwise you may see your husband giving up the therapy if it does not really help. He may not have the patience to try different therapists with you. You have to rebuild your trust with him which will not be easy. On the other hand, you have to plan for your and the baby's future if it's not working out since it will only be about 3 months when you give birth to your baby and will have even a lot more to deal with if you do not have your husband's support. Talk to your family or friends about it and seek their psychological support.

Answer 4

Cheating in a marriage is not something to be taken lightly. It is disrespectful to you and so inconsiderate of your current situation (pregnancy). This is the time that he should be more affectionate and attentive. You may have unresolved issues that has caused him to take solace outside of your marriage.I suggest you consult with a marriage counselor. Whatever decision you make will affect you and your child. You should also talk to your husband. Don't be easy on him, he doesn't deserve it. I hope everything works out for you.

Answer 5

Well, you haven't given much info, but based on what you have given, I would say, divorce his butt and hire a really good attorney to make sure you get decent child support and alimony. The child is not born yet, so divorcing won't break his/her life apart....while if you tried to work it out (and he needs to be on board for that, counseling if he says he wants to, otherwise walk) anyway....if you stuck around for five years and then finally gave up, it would tear your child's life apart.... sorry your man is such a dork.

Answer 6

Leave him its that simple. If he's cheating whos to say he won't have more kids. Plus think about all the things he could give you STD's . You need to worry only with your self and your baby that is what's important. I had 2 kids. they were 14 months apart and my youngest was 7 months old when I found out my x was cheating. yes It hurts but you will be better off.

Answer 7

If you KNOW he is cheating he has already left you. The divorce has already technically happened. It's not an option, its reality. However, his true repentance may be a chance to stay married.

Sorry to hear about your trouble. May God help you!

Answer 8

Pack your bags and leave. Get a good attorney would will get you child support.

The other option is to get counseling and recommit to your marriage, but it doesn't sounds like he is the type to be sorry and want to start fresh and committed

Answer 9

Pack up all of your crapola, and leave. Hold him responsible for child support for the baby, and start over with a hero, not a zero.

Answer 10

Check out www.KnowingMenBetter.com

There's an excellent manual on cheating and lying!