my husband and i have been married going on a year now. everything was good in the beginning. I started to notice after a while that he would lie about the smallest things. like whether he ate something or what he's doing on the computer or where he was or who he's talking to dumb things like that. but a few months ago i found him sending emails to a strange person and it didn't seem like it was legal so i asked him about it and he said the guy was his friend and he need his with some financial business. i didn't really believe it but i still let it go. and today i found some files that confirmed that whatever business they were conducting is indeed illegal. i don't know if i should confront him about it or dig deeper to get more info. i know he will just lie to me about it or get angry because i was in his files on my computer. either way i'm torn in what i should do. i don't want to be with a liar. any suggestions.
2007-04-05 07:15:38 · 11 answers · asked by baby girl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Tread with caution on this. Depending on what the illegal activity is and how much money is involved you could end up injured or worse.
Consult an attorney and get out before you get caught up in something that you didn't ask for.
2007-04-05 07:20:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A lair will never change, they only get better at it. If he is doing something illegal you don't want to be a part of it. You could also be charged if they came and seized the computer. If this is already happening do you think it will ever get any better? I can tell you it will only get worse, as lair only gets better at hiding things from you. They will go to any degree to keep it away, so be careful as you don't know what kind of business he is dealing in. I wouldn't dig deeper because you just never know what can happen nowadays, get out while you can and chalk it up to a lesson learned.
2007-04-05 07:25:20 · answer #2 · answered by Krinta 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it sounds like it's time to take the gloves off. If he's conducting illegal business, as his wife, you have the right to find out everything you can. I would also start getting my ducks in a row to move on. It will be really hard for you to trust him in the future, if he can't tell the truth now and is doing illegal business, you don't want to go down with him in the long run, you know?
2007-04-05 07:22:54 · answer #3 · answered by suzlaa1971 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you know for sure that he is involved in risky business then yes, you need to move on. You have to protect yourself!
But, if you are unsure about what you found, I do not think you should just walk out of your marriage without first confronting your husband about the issues and then trying to work through them - at least for a little while. We should not be so quick to just throw in the towel.
2007-04-05 07:39:48 · answer #4 · answered by Challenge 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Play dumb for a bit longer and snoop around some more. I say this for two reasons. First, you need to have as much information as possible before you confront him so that he can't lie his way out of it, and second, you will want to know in your mind and heart what you want him to do about it prior to confronting him so that when the dust settles and he asks, you can tell him. It's best to be prepared.
2007-04-05 07:24:00 · answer #5 · answered by VNCGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get counseling so you can leave him. and find a support group or friends that will help you. it is tough to get a divorce. but if he is lying now he will always lie and if he is doing something illegal i would report it to the police. Because if someone finds out about his "business" you could be an accomplice. Talk to a lawyer. I know its hard but leave if you dont do it know it will hurt you more in the future
2007-04-05 07:21:42 · answer #6 · answered by Lovely 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Baby girl, the answer from "H" has given you great advice. If you are certain you can no longer deal with the lies than I suggest you tell him that you want to separate. If he is involved with something that is illegal YOUR LIFE IS also at RISK. If it is dope and he doesn't pay the dealer then they could show up on your door step and you could pay the consequences. Honey, what ever you do be very careful and good luck.
2007-04-05 07:22:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are not a paranoid person, then I really don't like the way this sounds. I would definitely put off any future plans with him at this time until you know more.
2007-04-05 07:26:01 · answer #8 · answered by The Central Scrutinizer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is a liar and if you don't want to be with one then leave him. When he asks why you left tell him that you don't want to be with a liar and leave it at that.
2007-04-05 07:21:01 · answer #9 · answered by Rosie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you don't want to be with a liar, i think you know what to do.
take care of YOU.
2007-04-05 07:21:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋