Marriage!!!?

Question

What is happening to marriages today?
Is it slowly becoming extinct?
What's your opinion?

Answer 1

I know - Im not sure whats happening but it seems like more and more people dont see marriage as necessary - they'd rather just ride out the relationship for as long as it goes without having to actually commit themselves to anyone. Sure some of them might be scared of divorce or whatever but I think most people are just selfish and greedy and dont want to be tied to anyone or anything in case someone else catches their fancy.

Answer 2

This is just my opinion but the think the whole nature of relationships has changed on a cosmic or universal level. I think the change started about 25 years ago. At one time people were expected by society to get married and stay married. Some companies wouldn't even hire unmarried men, feeling they were irresponsible. There was also social, family and religious pressure to stay together no matter what. There was also only a small pool of partners to choose from and sex was not so easily available. That's all different now, especially with the advent of the internet. It opens the whole world up to people that they'd meet people the would never normally meet. So when some little thing bothers them in a relationship or something goes wrong, rather than work it out, just find someone else. People are putting more energy into careers than relationships, people are opting not to have children. Plus, without the societal pressure, people feel there is no need to stay in a situation that no longer is satisfying. In the past men had to get married to have consistant sex when society and religion put pressure on women to stay 'chaste' until they were married, and there was much more social scandal on porn, clubs and the like. Now there is an increase in alternative relationships which I think will increase in the future: cohabitation, long distance marriages/relationships, polyamorous relationships, gay families, etc.
Yes, I feel marriage as well have known it is becoming extint.

Answer 3

People don't respect marriage like they used to. The family unit once was the most important unit in any society, it's not so anymore. People don't see marriage as a partnership (read question below "Is it fair?" as a great example of that), and they view it as a convenient way to have sex and someone to spend time with. When that gets old, they move on. People have gotten inherently selfish, thinking that life is all about them (the "ME" generation), and a successful marriage is built on trust and selfLESSness. Selfishness will kill most marriages. People also view marriage as outdated, and will say stuff like "you don't need a piece of paper to make a committment." Well, yes you do. There is something about standing before people and saying "I do" that makes it stronger than just living together, that's why divorce is much more difficult than just "breaking up." Until this thought that is prevalent in society is changed, marriages will slowly become extinct, and I hope I'm long gone from this earth when that happens.

Answer 4

No, marriages are well and happy and healthy.

People are entering into marriage with the idea that their partners have to fill all of their needs, be everything they want and have no traits they don't want in a mate.

It's that simple.

Just ask any of your single 30 year old or 35 year old friend why they broke up with their last 10 mates and you will find out that you have some pretty shallow friends.

After you hear their reasons, ask them if they would want to marry anyone who would evaluate them they way they have evaluated others.

It's sad. I know a woman who refers to her ex marriage as the most horrific experience of her life, something so dark and evil she cries when she thinks about it.

She married him for security, had his baby because he promised to buy her a brand new sports car, and divorced him because he wanted more sex from her than she was willing to give him.

Then, when they were in court, he had her mercedes (the baby gift) removed from the parking lot and he sold it. That was the horrific part.

People are idiots. They think the world revolves around them and they aren't willing to even consider that the person sitting across from them at the breakfast table is more than just a face, but is really a person with a heart and feelings and needs and desires and dreams, just like you are.

But, I see people every day in my line of work, who believe they are the only people in the world.

Just don't be one of those people and maybe you can inspire others to be like you.

I know I am my husband's biggest fan, after 23 years and 5 of the rockiest first years together of any I have ever heard about.

But, a heart match can survive if the mind is willing to stop thinking about what's fair, what are your rights, equality, standing your ground.

You want to be right or you want to be happy? It's a choice most people don't realize they make when they pass judgment on their spouse and dump them in the belief that that they can do better. They don't realize that 'better' might want someone a little more willing to be part of a union, for life, good or bad, come what may.

Those are the words that bind.

If people would just give eachother permission to argue and know that no matter what, divorce was out of the question, they would get through it and find that every couple years, you fall madly and deeply back in love with your spouse, if that is what you look to do.

Answer 5

Don't buy into the hype. Marriage is STILL a wonderful way to express your love and dedication to someone by making a lifetime commitment.

The problem is people are marrying unhealthily. What I mean is people are making life long commitments without taking the time they need to get to know the other person to build trust, understand how the person deals with money, family, friends, etc and just getting to know the other person's character. Then other times people are not willing to work on their own issues. If you have issues within yourself and you continue to avoid them your marriage will be impacted and the relationship will eventually sour.

We all know that the dating relationship can be somewhat superficial because most of us are on our best behavior. It takes time to really get to know a person so that you can accurately assess your compatibility. In addition, sometimes people do not continue to work on their relationships after they get married. This will also cause the marriage to eventually sour.

But, statistically people who are happily married live longer, deal with stress better and generally have more stability and vitality. So, don't believe the propaganda! Marriage is still a viable option for some.

Answer 6

I think it's a sad statement about our society. 50% of marriages end in divorce and in my opinion it's because there is a lack of commitment. As soon as things get tough, financially or otherwise, they divorce or cheat. I just don't get it. People seem to like the idea of marriage but they're not willing to invest the time and energy to work through the rough times and stick together through everything as a partnership. I think people should really think about what marriage really is before they jump into it. It is a lifelong commitment to love, respect and cherish each other, through sickness and health in good times and bad. It seems like women are more into planning the wedding than they are into living the rest of their lives with their partner. Men seem to be more and more afraid of commitment because for some reason they think they're life ends when they get married. I am thankful to be happily married to my best friend and we can get through anything together.

Answer 7

People have forgotten to remember their wedding vows for more than 6 months. When you get married, it is suppose to be "till death do you part". Now, when there a ripple in the water, people no longer talk, they simply bail out and resort to the whole cheating "someone else can make it better" scenario. Seems like most people get married for the up-front enjoyment (wedding, bachelor/bridal parties, honeymoon), until they finally realize that marriage is actually like a job, it requires work, planning, talking and understanding.

I now hold my wedding gifts until 6 months after any wedding I attend. I'm tired of giving a gift, only to watch the marriage fall into divorce and the gift being a waste.

Answer 8

People just have different opinions of marriage nowadays. Not sure if that's a good or bad thing. I've been married for 12 years now - not always been great. had our ups and downs but we are still together.... Perhaps too easy to get out of now. My great grandmother and grandfather had been married for almost 60 years, had 10 kids and still held hands in the back of the car together - now how great is that..... Never met my great-grandfather but have great memories of my great-grandmother and boy am I proud of her.

Answer 9

I believe that marriage is not atking seriously anymore. People now a days get married for the wrong reason; such as because they are going to have a baby, or because they can't find anyone else. I also think that the media plays a big role in divorce. I think media overblows marriage to be such a perfect thing when reality is it will be bumpy along the way. I think people expect too much fairy tale and are disapointed when they realise it is just reality. I also think media pushes the "player" role, and cheating on your lover is the new hot thing.

Answer 10

i waited until i was in my 30's to get married. i have seen friends from high school go through up to 3 marriages! i didn't want to be like them. my mother married for the second time when she was 28 and she's still married today. i wanted to make the wiser choices that i could live with in the future. so i waited.
there are alot of people that think marriage is an outdated concept. but i don't think so. i feel more secure in my marriage than i ever felt in my other relationships. i know that we won't split up over one or two stupid fights. there's a determination to stick it out that was never there before. there's a dedication to each other that i never felt anybody have with me before.

call me a traditionalist, but i think that the people who scorn marriage are really missing out on something wonderful. i feel sorry for them.