My boyfriend wants to wait four years until his daughter is 18 to get married. We are abstinent now, although when we started our relationship, we were not for four or five months. I had no idea he was going to feel very guilty and want to stop being intimate--but that was seven months ago. He is born-again Christian and I am Episcopalian, so there is a difference there. But I respect him and us, and I have stayed with him. Love doesn't depend on sex--and I have grown in not having it in the relationship. But he plans on four abstinent years. This is a lot for me, but I do care for him. He wants to get engaged and wait so that his ex-wife doesn't pursue my assets for support. He is pressing the marriage issue. What are your thoughts?
2007-04-05 03:56:44 · 11 answers · asked by Mia 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I agree, David, he has some admirable qualities. He has no contact with his daughter.
2007-04-05 04:11:06 · update #1
I think there's more going on here than what he's telling you. There are many ways for your assets to be protected...that's what the law is for.
Something isn't right. He had no problem hitting it for months and then he got a religious??
2007-04-05 04:01:45 · answer #1 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, you have found a guy that respects his child enough to not want to draw his parental attention from her with a new marriage...
Respects your relationship enough not to complicate it with the emotions that go along with sex...
Respects the covenant of marriage and marital sex....
Respects you enough not to entangle you in his past mistakes...
I don't know, this sound like a pretty damn good guy. I can appreciate that four years is a long time, but it sounds to me like he has a number of rather admirable qualities.
2007-04-05 04:09:09 · answer #2 · answered by David P 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your assets can not be used in assessing his ex-wives support only his. That is a phony excuse. I suggest you discuss this with a lawyer to see what he says. Then if I am correct see what happens then. If he comes up with another reason then I would get out of a bad situation.
2007-04-05 04:03:57 · answer #3 · answered by mnwomen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't this his wife CAN pursue your assests. Did he contact a lawyer or something? I don't understand why a man would want to get married, but want to wait till his daughter is 18. It just doesn't make sense to me. Of course, there is not enough information to go on here, but I would definitely sit down with him, ask him to see a lawyer about his fears of support, and tell him you don't want to wait.
2007-04-05 04:01:27 · answer #4 · answered by bina64davis 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ummm...his ex wife cannot pursue your assets for support. If thats the reason hes using hes feeding you a line of crap........His ex has absolutely NO legal claim to your assets or income, it is based solely on his whether he remarries or not.
2007-04-05 04:02:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
His ex-wife has no rights to YOUR assets..Something does not sound right you are not telling us the whole story..Also no sex for 4yrs..Maybe he is impotent and just doesn't know how to tell you..Your right sex is not everything but come on 4yrs?????
2007-04-05 04:07:49 · answer #6 · answered by Maureen B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Four years without sex? No thanks! I don't care how much you love him. I'd definitely date other people. Besides, a guy with that kind of sexual guilt can't possibly be any fun after marriage.
2007-04-05 04:01:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
RUN AND RUN FAST....no sex for four years...I would be gone faster than u could say good bye
2007-04-05 03:59:57 · answer #8 · answered by sunbun 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if u guys love each otherrrrrrr, the intensions are right and you are willing to do so, why not.
2007-04-05 04:01:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you both are truly in love then its worth waiting
2007-04-05 04:09:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋