he doesnt respect me and tried to get with my sister and he claims he did it because he didnt think he was with me he always does this stuff like its a big joke
2007-04-05 01:46:00 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he claims the threesome would help i doubt it
2007-04-05 01:48:17 · update #1
This person is your fiance? You're going to marry someone who treats you like this? Dump him NOW!
2007-04-05 01:49:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
From what I gather, your main question is how to handle what irks you in such a way that you and your fiance don't blow up. I agree that you shouldn't be sweating the small things but sometimes it's hard to do that and you just need to rant. I would call up my best friend or my mother or sister, anyone that you think will understand why you're so irritated with his mother and sister. Tell them all about it so that when you're with your fiance you're not as irritated and antsy. Your fiance probably doesn't have a clue why you're irked by something like frosting or $30, to him they're so small they don't register on his radar. You could explain to him about the $'s (like you did here only nicely) and why it irked you but the frosting... no chance. Don't fight with him and try to make him see your point, just tell him nicely what you think (e.g. that she shouldn't be shopping for frivolities if she's so broke that you both needed to help her with the wedding). He'll probably retort with something and you just say, Ok, I was just saying what I thought. And then you leave it. Agree to disagree. And if he tries to continue the conversation into an argument, pull it up short and tell him that you don't want to fight about something so inconsequential. The two of them are not worth it. Other than this you've handled things quite graciously, your dodge on the cupcakes was very well done. There isn't really much you can do about your SIL spending money but claiming she doesn't have any, chances are good that she was buying on credit and it'll catch up to her eventually. Good luck with everything, especially in the last week when things just get hectic.
2016-05-17 22:13:54 · answer #2 · answered by marietta 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The real issue is "Why are you REALLY with him?". You already said "he doesn't respect me...". Do not start your life like this. It's unfortunate how many women put theirselves through such things and do not realize it until it's TOO LATE. You can not end the relationship because there isn't one to end. All you need to do is listen to yourself when you say "he doesn't respect me...." and find someone who does, because that is OBVIOUSLY important to you. Do not be foolish to think such a thing will help. He is a manipulator and an abuser. Find a LOVEr and a nurturer. Additionally, do not bother with trying to change him because you can not. He isn't and may NEVER be ready to change. Let him play his games with someone else.
"A kindhearted woman gains respect, but ruthless men gain ONLY wealth." Proverbs 11:16 NIV
God Bless
2007-04-05 02:57:01 · answer #3 · answered by blazinwulf 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The question you need to be asking yourself is why you accept what he is doing? Do you think he will change when you get married? It will only get worse. If you are not willing to join him in his sexual self-destruction then now is the time to get out of the relationship and let him go so that you can meet someone who values sexual relations for what they are, an expression of love.
He will not ever respect you - he has gone too far because he knew you would not leave him. Move on - he's not worth it.
2007-04-05 02:35:05 · answer #4 · answered by Stefka 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is wrong with people today? Sex doesn't solve anything and a threesome will only cause more trouble and trust will be gone. You need to get out of that relationship and find someone who actually loves you.
2007-04-05 01:53:34 · answer #5 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YUK. It sounds like it's time to get rid of the fiance and move on. If he can't respect you now, and going for family members, it's not going to get any better. If someone couldn't respect me, nothing else would come out of it. You deserve better. He sounds selfish and ignorant, which are two characteristics no one needs to deal with. Best Wishes!
2007-04-05 02:18:12 · answer #6 · answered by suzlaa1971 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So if you weren't having problems, you would do it? No man who truly loves you would MAKE you have a threesome. He has no respect for you and if you go through with your marriage, you will be very unhappy.
2007-04-05 02:14:20 · answer #7 · answered by Cocoa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't respect you. Regardless of what anyone says, there are plenty of good men out there who will. Playing with feelings that involve sensitive issues is no joke. Leave him! Then, the joke's on him. See how funny he thinks that is.
2007-04-05 02:32:59 · answer #8 · answered by aka_emt332 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The better question,
"Why the heck haven't you thrown your disrespectful, unappreciative fiance to the curb?"
"What exactly are you waiting to happen to tell you that he isn't the one for you?"
Love doesn't force you to do things against your will and better judgment. Love is like a gentleman. Is your man acting like a gentleman or a sex freak with no regard for your feelings?
You be the judge.
2007-04-05 02:17:27 · answer #9 · answered by DaMan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
End the engagement and get away from him. He is showing all the signs of an abuser and you do not want to spend your life with a man like that.
He will NOT change EVER!!! Do not think that he will ever stop acting like he is now. Getting married to him will only make things worse, because then he will know that he has you as his property.
Get rid of him and if he does not go quitely speak to a women's shelter and get help to get rid of him.
Take care,
Troy
2007-04-05 01:51:03 · answer #10 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Get rid of him. Find someone would will respect you and not try to dip into the 'family reserves'. If you are ever uncomfortable with a sexual proposition, you should tell him so.
2007-04-05 02:11:25 · answer #11 · answered by trikelkelley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋