It's been almost 4 years now...i'm 24 years old and he is 31.We met 3 months before his marriage, i.e. when he was engaged.His wife was in India than.
We did not know it was love.We both thought we would get over 1 another.Now he has a 1 year old daughter.He had spoken to his sister about me before and even to a priest but both were against the whole idea.Now his sister thinks it's over..My whole family does not know about this.They will never agree to it.
He said before and still says that he wants to marry me but I know it won't work out..How do I get over him?
2007-04-05 00:26:40 · 22 answers · asked by J F 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You're in a difficult situation, and the only resolution is to stop seeing him, and start getting out to meet other people. Don't let him play you; if he was going to leave his wife, he would have done it already. You deserve better than to be the "other woman". It's hard to get over someone you love, so be prepared to keep yourself very busy. It may not seem like it now, but you will find a man that will commit to you, and find love with each other. Best of luck!
2007-04-05 00:33:38 · answer #1 · answered by grandm 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
To begin this process you have to discontinue any and all contact with him...no phone calls, no emails, no visits, nothing! The more time that passes the more healing that will take place. Put yourself in his wife's shoes...would you want your husband seeing someone if you were in the same identical situation? I would bet she doesn't have any idea what he is doing with you. Why did you start seeing him when he was engaged? Were there not available men you could have a fling with? Any time we engage in relationships with unavailable people, we have a tendency to end up hurt. You deserve to have someone in your life that can give back what you give. An involved person can't ever do that...not fully. Limit your alone time...make yourself available to your friends and family..keep yourself busy and do not take any of his calls, etc. There is no magical way to get over him. Jumping into a relationship with someone else isn't fair to the other person so I strongly discourage that. Best wishes!
2007-04-05 07:42:49 · answer #2 · answered by Michele D 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No matter the story of this kind of relationship or how either party can kid themselves .. the fact is this - someone is going to get hurt, and you my girlfriend are sitting on the best odds of feeling the most of the pain and it is not pretty. This man that you love has chosen to marry another and this is a fact. I know it is difficult to separate truth from fantasy and emotions can run away from a woman at times, but you need to see things for what they really are. Sorry. You say yourself that it "wont work out" and you know more about this situation than you are saying here. In your heart - yes, you may love this person, but deep down you deserve much more and you need to remain aware of this. Good luck.
2007-04-05 08:05:25 · answer #3 · answered by square_dotzz 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What was an engaged and soon-to-be married man doing looking around? And why do you think he got married anyway and then has continued this relationship with you? You said of his sister and priest "Now they think its over". What is it they think is over? And what did you two start, and do you plan to continue? He had a child with his wife, my guess is even while you two were what-ever it is you are.
Baby - RUN!!!
He has shown you no respect and to me it seems like you are a bootie call, someone to stroke his ego, while he has he safe secure life WITH HIS WIFE.
Take care being the Other Woman is not an easy or good place to be.
2007-04-05 07:39:39 · answer #4 · answered by Barb Outhere 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You met him BEFORE he was married. At that time he could have chosen not to get married and he didnt.... why? because he had you all along. You were not a challenge. How can he trust you when you are an accessory to the crime. Sorry but there's no future between you two. How do you get over him? You are going to hear this from about 99% of the rest of the folks on here. Get yourself an UNATTACHED man.
2007-04-05 10:40:46 · answer #5 · answered by Sweetness 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well , it is up to you in the end to be in the second row. Wake up and face it , it he loved you , he should have cancled his marriage, not knowing that before , he could have done it after , he would not have kids from his wife. Face it he has his own life , but you dont!! .....it's 4 YEARS, how long will you wait for him to take an action? I think the action should be from your side, you should be strong to do it and go on with your life , once you did that you will see things in a different way and see how much time you have lost. Good luck anyway.
2007-04-05 07:54:09 · answer #6 · answered by funme 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Move on. Don't interfere with his marriage and what were you thinking that he's engaged, lets play with his little mind and see how committed he is kinda @#$%. I don't know the figures but it seems there are allot of women fighting for anothers husband but not much the other way around. Grow some respect for relationships even if you can't muster up enough to get one yourself.
2007-04-05 08:11:20 · answer #7 · answered by steinerrw 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My advice would to be to just walk away and do not contact him anymore. It's wrong for you to be involved with a married man and it's just as wrong for him to be unfaithful to his wife.
Additionally, he met you before he was married, yet he still married his wife and had a child with her.
There's a reason why everyone is both of your lives is against this relationship. That should tell you something.
2007-04-05 14:10:03 · answer #8 · answered by Jessica S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if you end up marrying him I'd imagine that it wouldn't be to long until he lost interest you and a sparked an interest with someone else at his work. At first it will just be a work/flirt thing and then it will move on to going out for diner (but it won't be considered a date) and then opps the next thing you know his penis will be in her vagina.
2007-04-05 14:59:20 · answer #9 · answered by kirby j 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let him know for one last time... it is not right. After that, isolate him from your life and find other stuffs to occupy your time.
Remind yourself again and again, the same way you are seeing a married man now, that will be the same way another woman will date your future husband. I believe in karma...
Do you want that?
2007-04-05 07:39:03 · answer #10 · answered by ET 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋