Do you have the choice of being a father?

Question

what if you were with a girl and the girl found out she was pregnant ....so you said get an abortion and she refused to....and you explained every reason why she should have an abortion and explained to her that you couldnt provide for the child.......but she still wants to go through with the pregnancy and says that you dont have to do anything but sign over your rights what does that mean ? she says she doesnt want you to have anything to do with the child just sign over your rights?

thats just it she doesnt know who its for....she wasnt my girlfriend and she was sleeping with someone else also....she told me that she was sleeping with someone else after she found out she was pregnant she told me it was a possibility its not for me.....and she said she didnt want anything to do with the other person she was sleeping with .....so i brought up abortion

Answer 1

Sure you have a choice of being a father--use protection.

You got a girl pregnant. You can't undo that and you can't tell her to JUST get an abortion because it's inconvient to you. That's selfish and immature.

Own up to what you did. Signing over your rights as a father means you don't get any custody.

Answer 2

First of all, no, you can't force her to have an abortion. Signing your rights as a father means that you sign a legal document that says that yes, you are the biological father of the child, no, you don't want anything to do with the child ever again, you do not wish to be in this child's life in any way, you can not file for custody at any time. In the eyes of the law, as far as you're concerned, this child never existed. You will have no say in what the mom does in the child's life, no right to even see the baby. On the other side of it, you also don't have to pay child support. Because, as I said, the child does not exist to you in the eyes of the law.

Personally, I don't blame her for asking you to sign your rights away. If you're man enough to get in the bed without wrapping that up, you need to be man enough to step up and take care of your responsibilities. Consider what this girl is going through right now!! She needs your love and your support, not you telling her basically that this child you created together is worthless and she should get rid of it.

Answer 3

That means you will not have to pay any support to this child, which is wrong, but you also would not have any right to speak to this child later in life as a father figure. I think you should grow up and own up to your responsibility and be a man. If you cant afford it, maybe you and the mom could talk about adoption. But there is a lot of help out there for people that dont feel they can afford to have a child. But you should have thought about this before you jumped in bed with someone. Sorry for being so blunt but, abortion is not a form of birth control. Wrap your willy if you dont want kids!! Or stay out of the bedroom. :)

I think she is a mighty strong woman if she would rather you sign over your rights as a father than get child support, that shows maturity on her behalf.

Answer 4

If you're not married to her and she's fine with not receiving any financial support from you then just don't sign an affidavit of paternity when the child is born. Then you won't be listed on the birth certificate as the father and you will have no rights.

If she decides to have you DNA tested though, there's not much you can do about that. You'll be court ordered to submit to a chain of custody DNA test and after you are determined to be the father your name will go on the birth certificate. That will give her the right to get child support from you, and it will give you the right to obtain visitation or custody.

If you are established as the father on the birth certificate you cannot simply "sign away your rights." The only way you'll be allowed to do that is if there's another man willing to adopt the child and assume financial responsibility for it.

Answer 5

Paternity (fatherhood) is legally established in one of three ways; the mother acknowledes you as the father on the birth certificate, you can sign a declaration of paternity at the hospital when the baby is born, or you can asert your paternal rights through the courts (This involves a DNA test if the mother does not acknowledge you). Since I assume you are a minor you can not legally waive your rights to the child until you are 18 unless a Judge makes it a court order (not likely). Keep in mind you are financially responsible for that child regardless of your ability to pay. Meaning if the mother opts for any state aid,the state will pay the mother child support and bill you for the balance regardless of whether you assert your paternal rights or not. In some cases minors parents have been required to pay child support until the parent is 18 years of age. I hope I answered the legal aspects of the question. As for what moral obligation you have that is between you, your God, and your family. Beaware there is the distinct possibility that one day your child will show up on your doorstep and you will have to account for your actions.

Answer 6

You have a right to be in your childs life. But if you wanted her to get an abortion then I agree with her and you shouldn't get any rights!! You didn't want the baby to begin with. That is incredibly selfish of you. Good for her to keep the baby! But if you do sign over rights then you have no say at all with the child you could have had.

Answer 7

Obviously if you asking her to have an abortion , you do not want anything to do with the baby-so she is asking you to sign away your rights to the child- and she will raise him/her on her own. Obviously this girl respects life enough to carry the child to term. If you do not feel that you are the father take a DNA test when he/she is born and then you will not be responsible for the child. However you chose to sleep with a woman, she conceived- so your next choice needs to be a responsible one- if this child is yours- support both of them.

Answer 8

She's giving you a choice. Apparently she wants this baby and trying to tell her to abort it when she clearly wants it is not something you should do. I would consider yourself lucky since you aren't able to provide for the child. Signing over your rights means that she is only one with any legal parental rights to the child and that you are free of any responsibility from the child. Some women take their men to court in order to make them be a father. At least she's giving you a choice and not demanding that you stay.

Answer 9

She is saying that if you dont want anything at all to do with this baby then if you sign over your parental right you dont have to have anything to do with it, and she wont be able to pursue you for anything in the future if you sign over your rights. If you cant afford to pay for a kid, then at least being there for the baby physically is good enough. A kid should always have both parents involved in its life. She obviously dont want any money from you if she is asking you to sign over your rights so if you really just dont see yourself at least being there for the baby physically then sign your rights over, it will make the whole thing less complicated. If you want to at least be a part of the kids life then dont sign over your rights, but its basically releasing you of any responsibility if you do. Hope this helps.

Answer 10

You go to a lawyer draw up the paper work for your state and sign them. This means that you have no say so over what decisions that she makes for the child and you do not pay her child support. You also will probably never see your child either. This is what signing over your rights means. You have NO say so with this child.