Would You Still Marry Her?

Question

You broke up with your girlfriend. But you were reunited four months after. Everything was going fine until you found out that she's pregnant. The sad thing is, the baby isn't yours and the father is her ex-bf, who was there the time you broke up with her. What would you do?

Answer 1

Ask yourself this, do you love her enough to accept the baby as your own? Can you treat the baby like your own? Will you be able to look at the child and not think about the other guy?
If you can answer all of those questions with yes, then marry her and make sure your name isn't on the birth certificate and the father of the child is paying child support.
Good Luck.

Answer 2

I would not make the decision to marry so soon. I would find out what happened 4 months ago that made the breakup happen in the first place. Based upon the answer, I would make a decision if I wanted to pick up the relationship again or not.

Her being pregnant is not an issue about whether or not you should marry her. The question is, "Do you want to date someone that left you a few months ago, slept with someone else, then returns to you........for what? If you do decide to date her again, then understand that you will be helping raise someone's else's baby. Then the issue(s) start. Dealing with the baby's father, trusting her and the decisions she will make using the baby, do you want to be a dad yourself now, etc.

Really think about why you guys broke up in the first place. Decide if that reason and the potential upcoming circumstances are things you want to deal with (not CAN deal with). You could deal with almost anything if you put your mind to it. But, do you really want to? Don't make selfish decisions, there's a baby that will enter the picture.....soon.

And if you think love is the answer, think about just how much she LOVED you when this happened. It takes two, not one or three. Know what I mean?

Answer 3

It depends whether the the guy really love the girl. if he really does, he will not mind whether the baby is his or the ex-bf. however, what if the ex-bf wants her and the baby bacK? will the current bf let go? should take into alot of consideration why she sudden come back to look for the current bf? cos' she knows she is pregnant therefore looking for a man to takecare of her? or otherwise? And how do the guy knows that the baby is not his but the ex-bf? Should start thinking and consider before making any decision but got to be fast cos' the baby is coming to this earth soon. the birth cert need a father's name.

Answer 4

I would NOT marry her. You broke up, and within four months she is pregnant with an ex-boyfriend.....it sounds like to me that she feels like she can always USE you. This isn't love, it is connivance on her part. Also, by marrying her before the birth of the baby, you LEGALLY take all responsibility's of the child. Can you say CHILD SUPPORT??? Can you say the word DIVORCE? If you still truly want to marry her, I would put in a long engagement of say at least 12 months before, and make sure she lists the true biological father on the birth certificate, to help save your own butt later.

Answer 5

Find out if the real father intends to be in the baby's life. Then decide if you can deal with the idea that this is not your child. Remember that you must treat this child no different than any other children that you have together should you decide to marry. Also, remember that this child will become attached to you if you stay around. This means that if you change your mind later, you are hurting the child as well as the mother. Good luck with your decision.

Answer 6

It would never be a healthy relationship. The only way it could happen would be if the guy is either a desperate doormat, or has approached a zen-like state where he has no ego. Either way doesn't sound like a satisfying relationship to be in, or a good place for a child to grow up. The lady has to take the decision here and move on, the guy deserves to know the truth too.

Answer 7

that is so up to you! If you love her and she loves you , you could make it work. Your comittment would be pushed to the limit though. You'd have to have contact with the babys father forever....even if you claim the babe as yours the biological father can come into your lives and disrupt it majorly......this is a choice you will haveto live with forever should you marry and raise the child. Think long and hard. Good luck in whatever you decide. I have a friend that had that identical situation and it has worked out ok for them.

Answer 8

Wanna know something crazy? This EXACT scenario happened to me.

And I was totally willing to marry her. I would have gladly raised the child as my own, and it didn't even occur to me to have a problem with it.

The problem was this: She was desperate for someone to help her raise her child. She knew I was a decent, stable guy and that I would gladly take care of her and her child. But were we really ready to be married? Absolutely not.

But it wasn't my burden. I was 18 and I was NOT ready to be a father, and I hadn't done anything to cause a pregnancy. Eventually, I had to admit that. I felt guilty, and she helped make me feel guilty, but ultimately I made the right choice in not staying with her.

This guy has to decide whether raising a child is really what he wants. And this girl has to let him make that choice.

Answer 9

If it is my girlfriend then I would marry her. My heart would be broken because I would have wanted to share that with her but the child will still be loved by both of us. It would be hard to get over but I'm sure it would be even harder for her. It depends on if you put yourself before the one you love.

Answer 10

Personally, I might, I might not....it would depend on my feelings for the woman...also if I felt I couldn't support the baby then unfortunately no. But....more than likely yes I would marry her....just not straight away.