Okay at 18 yrs of age when i had my daughter and at the time her dad was in prison .Her dad was 17 yrs old and had been coming home from a party drunk and hit someone putting that person in a coma.He spent 5 yrs in prison for this during this time but I wrote him some letters to him and i sent some photos of his daughter to him.I went to college in mean time majored in interior design and graduated. i met my current hubby of 3 yrs who is a cop few years later.My daughter bio-dad who had been out of prison became a mechanic and started paying child support seeing his daughter everyother weekend.My new hubby did not like this at all and lots of fighting started because he would throw insults.Hubby and i are now seperated and my daughters father has been coming over more often he sleeps over on friday movie night. Always had feelings for my childs bio-dad why are they turning into something more?
2007-04-03 15:43:20 · 14 answers · asked by Jessica S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Before rushing into anything with your child's father, make sure this is what you want. When we feel lonely it is easy to start thinking it will work, and it could. It is best to date and see how it goes, whether he has changes and willing to settle down. If it is love it will stay that way and even get stronger. It can only turn into something more if you let it.
2007-04-03 15:59:30 · answer #1 · answered by Krinta 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have serious issues that you need to work out. Do you have a child custody agreement? If not, I suggest you see a lawyer and have one drawn up so both you and the child's father will know what your rights and limits are.
Your husband is being immature about the situation. You must have married him because you loved him. He has to understand that while he has been helping you take care of a child that isn't his biologically, the bio-father still has a right to see her.
As for your feelings, you are the one who needs sort that out. When the bio-father comes to see the kid, have the meeting in a neutral setting like at a restaurant or a mall. Don't let him sleep over.
2007-04-03 15:50:43 · answer #2 · answered by Blue Jean 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will always share a bond with him, because you have a child together. If that is blossoming, then just see where it goes. However, if you want to try this relationship out, then you take the risk of losing the supportive husband you have had for the past 3 years. He has been there for you and your daughter and now is upset, insecure, and scared of losing you to the real father. Apparently, he is feeling this way for a good reason. If you plan to have sleepovers, then you should file for a divorce. This situation is not fair to your current husband.
2007-04-03 15:49:50 · answer #3 · answered by Shanna h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have had unresolved feelings for this man all this time. It's okay, just go with the flow, get to know eachother again. But do not rush into it...there will be obstacles for you two to overcome. Just remember that your child's safety and well being is the most important thing here, and that you deserve happiness and respect too. Good luck, and be happy...with or without a man!
2007-04-03 15:50:22 · answer #4 · answered by Redawg J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well your husband shouldn't of been jelouse because he knew that your baby had a father and the father has every right to see her however he must of felt threatened by him. He leaves and bam you are having feelings for your babies daddy. Your husband must of thought you still had feelings for him and deep down inside you must of shown it. You are still young and caught up in a situation that you really need to think hard about. My husband now says insults about my ex and I would never get mad because those feelings are gone. If your husband treated you well and loved you then I suggest you work it with your husband and try to remain friends with the ex. You married your husband for a reason. You couldn't of just married him and used him until the father got out of prison. He probably feels used.
2007-04-03 15:56:03 · answer #5 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are turning into something more because a) no matter what you are tied to him forever through that child; b) your husband is gone; c) you tell us?
I think you need your distance from BOTH of them to figure out what you really want and need. Clearly the two of them have put a lot of pressure on your in different ways......thats a lot of conflict.
Please remember though that you are married, and you took a sacred vow. If I were you, I'd take a look at trying to fix my marriage first.
2007-04-03 15:51:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Feelings are turning into something more because you once had a relationship with him and now since he is out and spending more time with the child you probably grew fond of him once more. It's normal.
2007-04-03 15:48:56 · answer #7 · answered by missdontgivafukusa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound odd. Your life with him was abruptly interrupted so the feelings are still there. You were probably planning on marrying him back then, it's not like either one of you ended the relationship before the accident happened.
2007-04-03 15:50:25 · answer #8 · answered by strawberry 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like maybe you've always loved him just wouldn't let yourself admit it. He messed up but we all do so maybe something can work out for you two. For some reason I heart tends to find it's way even against our minds better judgement. Good Luck!!
2007-04-03 15:47:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you never had the chance to grow up together. He messed up when he was young and maybe you are suppose to be together as a family. I hope it all works out and he is a good guy.
2007-04-03 15:49:11 · answer #10 · answered by lucki female 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋