Yours or others needs first?

Question

i usually put others cuz i feel guilty if i dont but then it's damaging for myself.....which one do you usually put first? why?

Answer 1

Mine ... I need to be "together" before I can help anyone else ...

Answer 2

I agree with the first answer, you do have to be able to decide who's needs are greater in the moment, and the guity feeling is was one I was familiar with.
As a Mum of 4, I've always believed that the kids and hubby deserved the best I could give them, but they became ungrateful, always expecting that I would do without so they could have whatever, and I became worn out and sick.
Then I realised (Too slowly) that I could give them another gift - Personal responsibility. I realised that I could show them that they could sometimes be the giver, the one to sacrifice, the one to make do so someone else could have, and I think that we are all better people for that. The kids no longer believe that everything should be handed to them on a plate, hubby no longer believes that everything outside of his work is my responcibility, and I no longer feel totally used up. A win - win situation.

Answer 3

depends on the need and the person in question really. I'm not sacrificing myself but so much