Stay at home moms?

Question

I wasn't sure where to put this question. I'm not married nor do I have children, but I have a question.

What do people have against stay-at-home-moms? Really. Every woman is entitled to a CHOICE. Isn't THAT what equality is about? The freedom to choose between the work place and raising a family full time without being judged?

If a woman wants to be a career woman, that's just great, but what gives her the right to think stay at home moms don't have their priorities straight? And vice versa for that matter. They DO have their priorities straight, their priority is to raise a family, not to work, and there's nothing wrong with that. Just like a career woman's priority is to work, not to stay at home with her kids. There's nothing wrong with either way, but why do stay at home moms have such a bad reputation?

And why do men suddenly have a problem with it? Years ago, they demanded it. Now that women have a choice, they don't like it? These women deserve the same amount of respect.

Is the husband wanted to stay home, nothing wrong with that either. That's what I'm saying. I'm saying nothing is wrong with any of these choices, but people find problems with it. I'm not making generalizations. In fact, me saying nothing's wrong with any choice is pretty open minded.

Answer 1

True, everyone deserves to be treated with kindness and respect, regardless of their personal choices.

I personally commend those women that sacrifice their personal goals and desires for having the strength to stay home with the children. It is not an easy task.

After being a stay-at-home Father for several years I can honestly say I believe that commonly women have a more natural knack at doing it better. Especially in the day to day patience department. You woman have an amazing inner strength to stay the course as you watch the foolish preditors eat eachother alive. I've learned this through the lady I love at home.

Demographically, you will find less stay-at-home mothers in say San Fran. than you will in let's say more tradintional homes like Texas. This is to suggest that traditions do play somewhat of a role in our daily priorities.

Realize however, one is not better than the other. They are because they are. No good, no bad here.

It's a tough call in today's society. In many homes, both parents HAVE to work in order to make ends meet. Which really is an illusion of limitations. But tough to break.

And there's no mystery that we live in a very me, me me society these days. But remember, what goes up, comes down. We are already seeing that shift in-which many career women are choosing that staying at home with their children is more rewarding then aquiring than a high position.

It just all depends on the person in question.

It take a very giving person to love and raise a child in a positive way. Your reward isn't people coming up to you and complimenting your decisions. Your reward is watching your children grow up and become beautiful giving and loving people. That is it.

In the "end", what the world needs is not another career, it needs more compassion and more compassionate people in it.

Right now, you're planting a seed. If you water it mindfully and not reactionary, you will have a beautiful tree yeilding beautiful fruit in time.

If you feel your personal path is straight and narrow, that's when you know it's time to put on your walking shoes and go for it. It never seemed to stop people like Jesus or Buddha.

This is your life, your choices. Worry not the life or choices of others. Be kind to all. Be content. You will do fine.

With Metta

Answer 2

I would think that women should have the right to either stay at home or holding down a job. I know, I fought for this equality. Men back in those ages thought that is what a wife and mother is for, being there for them. It is not the amount of time spent with your family it is the quality of that time. Working moms in this day and age is a normal stance. Because really both pay checks are needed. A lot of women have the short end of the stick because they have to work, then go home and fix supper, tend to the kids, pop a load of clothes in the dryer, they have 2 jobs as I see it, I believe the husband should have 1/2 of that home work. I really had not seen where it went back to the "dark ages" as I so put it, but I will keep my eyes open for more work at home moms. It is the woman's right to pick what she wants.

Answer 3

The problem with SOME not ALL stay at home moms is that many of them complain about how boring it is when some of them made the choice to stay home and be moms and wives. You got career women who juggle some if not more than most stay at home moms and got a lot more to complain about. If you stay at home with your kids at least have something to do like a part time job so it gets you away from the house for a few hours.

You would be surprised how some SAHM's don't have their priorities straight since I've grown up around a lot of SAHMs and they were pretty out of touch with the lives career moms had balancing their lives between the office and home and many who were doing double time as single parents due to divorce or otherwise.

Answer 4

Here here! I'm not a stay at home Mom- or a Mom at all- but I know full well I'll get a lot of crap for leaving my FT job when my husband and I decide to have children... I think the bad rap comes from those women who stay at home and don't really do anything (no children, spending their husbands money etc). A lot of people don't realize how much effort goes into caring for a child 24 hours a day- it's a FT job and then some!...and you don't get paid, vacation, or holidays...
The first 5 years of life are considered the most important and influential in the psychological and emotional development of a child and psychologists agree that the more contact, bonding, and time that a child spends with their family unit in the first 5 years of life leads to better rounded more secure adults! There's nothing wrong with daycare- infact I think all kids should go to day care if even only for one day a week so they can learn socialization skills- but nothing can replace the time you spend with your child in those first 5 years of his or her life. I say more power to those women who can juggle working and rasing a child but I'm CHOSING to leave the work force and focus on my greatest legacy-my children. Work comes and goes- every one is replaceable in the corporate world... but as a parent- at home and in your child's heart you're never replaceable.

Answer 5

I am a stay-at -home mom now I worked for many years as a forman at a roofing company among other outdoor jobs i had and at the age of 34 I have a hard time getting out bed sometimes but my new husband makes it easy on me to stay at home with the kids. Both jobs are full time jobs. people say things eather way you go. I just depends on the family if she can stay home or not It should be the womans choice

Answer 6

I couldn't agree with you more. I think that stay-at-home moms can be great for the family environment. I'm not so sure that if I had kids that I could balance doing laundry, dishes, school, activities and have a whole other full time job. It's really not fair to put such stresses on one person. I think your kids suffer as well. I do have to give mad props to the full time moms and workers out there- what they do is amazing, but if you don't have to kill yourself like that, why would you? Unfortunately, it usually takes two incomes to support a family these days so women do have to take on two jobs, that's why it's important for the men to help out too. I'm sure that helps.

Answer 7

I am a stay at home mom,and I plan on staying that way until both my children are in school all day!We are financially stable to where I can stay at home and raise the children,they are my children and if I have the option to be the one who cares for them full time I am going to take advantage of that!I know some women do not have that option,and it's great that they work to help or singly provide for themselves and their children!I honestly don't care what other people's opinions are of what I do!I will go back to work,most likely part time when it fits into out schedule,but as for now I am going to stay home and take care of my babies!!

Answer 8

My wife made the choice to stay at home after our second child was born because daycare sucked something fierce and I had gotten some pay raises. Not everyone can afford to do this, however. This isn't the 1950s anymore. A stay at home mom is almost a luxury these days. Our kids are definitely better for it.

Answer 9

I am gonne be a stay at home mom. Because i am not planning on working just for expensive day care. And i would like to raise my own baby and be there for his first step and word. I admire women who go back to work good for them. But every women feels different. Some men exctually like there women at home with the kids. Honestly i don't even trust people at day cares or babysitters to watch my child the whole day!!

Answer 10

Probably because people get jealous. If it makes a woman happy to stay at home with her babies and the family can afford it, I think she should do it and not be judged. It's admirable to actually raise your own children instead of just giving them to babysitters all day. But then again you have stay at home moms with their kids in school already. I think that's stupid. Once the kids hit pre school all the stay at home moms should do something to help out financially.