Bill the Spite Guy's Philosophical Poser of the Day: All love is conditional. Agree or disagree?

Question

I think all love is ultimately conditional, as we are all human and finite and therefore have a breaking point.

Answer 1

I guess that would depend on what you consider a condition.

In most cases I think that it's obvious that love is conditional. You love your friends on the condition that they are kind, compassionate, supportive, etc. You love your lover on the condition that they are faithful, supportive, affectionate, etc. There are exceptions, of course, where a friend or lover fails in some area, but you love them anyway. I think that comes from an appreciation of some other characteristics of theirs that make you feel that they are worth loving despite their faults. However, that just means that the condition for you loving them is some other thing about them, not that there is no condition.

The only type of relationship where I think you might be able to consider love unconditional is that of parents for their children. Parents (at least some of them) love their children regardless of what they say or do, even if they become hardened and steadfastly evil criminals. The only way you could consider this kind of love conditional is if you consider the parent-child relationship the condition.

Answer 2

I agree with you. Love is an emotion. And like any other emotions, it only arises when certain conditions are present. If love were unconditional, I could just be walking down the street and fall in love with a random person. Of course, it doesn't work that way. We fall in love with people who have traits that we desire. Even the parental love is conditional because the parent loves the child for carrying on their genes and the child loves the parent for enabling it to survive. Love is a beautiful and desirable thing, but it isn't magical. There are always conditions. We don't exist in a vacuum.

Answer 3

I believe love to be contingent on the benefits it confers upon us. If the benefits dry up, it's no longer love.

So i guess I'd say that, as long as the love is present, it's *not* conditional, but if the love is no longer convenient, it's no longer there, at which point conditionals can take their toll...

you might want to consider the work of Jean Luc Marion -- he's working on "love as a philosophical question" right now and is a visiting scholar at my school and has been giving lectures on the subject.

I think it's BS, but whatever, lol. He'll be publishing a book on "the erotic phenomenon" this year, and there might be some current papers of his discussing this idea.

Answer 4

Disagree. But it all depends on the definition of 'love'. When you crack that little nut, maybe we can be talking on the same level.

For me, it's the same as the question of altruism. Economists by and large believe it doesn't exist. There has to be some sort of benefit to the giver, whether it be only the 'good' feeling that one gets. Homoeconomicus and all that crap.

I define 'love' as a decision... therefore my thought is that yep, if I decide to love someone come hell or highwater, it can be without conditions. Goes to free will. You can't make me unlove you.

I'll prove it right now Bill the Spite guy... I have decided to love you... Can you feel the love, dude?

Peace

Answer 5

I think most love is conditional, but certainly not all. The love a mother feels for her child will always remain, no matter what the child may do - no matter how horrible the acts the child may do even when older - the mother may have her heart broken and feel anger but it will never change her love.

Also, take a pet for example. I love my dog. I'd love my dog no matter what - it could kill something I love and even though I may put it down for the act because of violence issues, it would still hurt because that love would always remain for it.

And last, but the most important....Christ is an example of unconditional love. We humans are horrible creatures, but He dies sinless because of his unconditional love.

So...yes, most love has conditions on it for most people, but those of us who know what love truly is - nothing can take the love out of our hearts, even when we are done so wrong by the one we love.

Answer 6

Yes, love can be conditional because love is in fact a decision we make. We decide who we love whether it be family or a partner.

All decisions are conditioned to what we are looking for. Therefore, if we make the decision to love we have made it in the condition that __________ (you fill in the blank).

Success!

Answer 7

I disagree with boz4425. WHen a parent has a child that steals and sells all of the parent's valuables, physically abuses them, and other general mayhem, it is not "love" that the parent can truly claim to have. It is delusion or maybe addiction.

Love is conditional.

Answer 8

I disagree strongly and I have one stament that says love is totaly unconditional and here it is: John 3:16:For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. God's love is forever unconditional and thats the truth read the Bible and you'll see that it's all for our good.
God picked me up and cleaned me up I was druged out and only in the strength of his love was I able to get free,you can says it's a crock but it's my life thats been changed by His unconditional love! My e-mail [e-mail]

Answer 9

True love is not conditional. Some people have reached this state of love; however, not all people can climb to the emotional level.

Answer 10

Real love is, yes. But there are times when love is used as a pawn for manipulation (knowingly or unknowingly), and in those cases it is obviously not unconditional. To come full circle, no, all love is not unconditional.