serious question! please answer!?

Question

my friend is nice but she talks behind everyones back!! even mine somtimes and says mean things................should i dump her or just wait and see if thing change?? or help wat else should i do!

Answer 1

she probably doesnt mean to hurt anyones feelings when she says mean things. I tend to talk behind peoples back too and its not because i dont like them, its just because i have a BIG MOUTH. I love all of friends but unfortanatly i have a weird personality fault that i am trying to change. you could point out to her that she shouldnt talk behind peoples backs. My friends have dont that and it has helped to make me stop doing it as much.

Answer 2

Unfortunately, there are many people out here like your friend. This is basically a sign of insecurity and lack of immaturity. She feels that talking bad about people including fri ends is her way of personal power and she actually thinks this makes her friends whereas in reality it does quite the opposite and eventually chases everyone away as no one likes a gossip. Confronting only gives her fuel to go on and not only will she deny it, she ll use itagainst you. Someday when she has no one to talk to or no one wants to hang around her she will realize exactly what she has done. She will have no one to blame but herself. She just has to grow up a bit and she ll be alright, although shes going to lose some real good friends in the meantime. Unless you dont mind being talked about behind your back, you can remain friends, but its your choice, someday she will change. Good luck

Answer 3

Hi Becky: Life will be filled with people testing your feelings.
You can deal with them in a couple ways. One you can be brave and confront them about it. Or you can run away from relationship's that you are afraid to deal with. I think you will find out your fear of loosing a friend is like most fears. If you resist they persist. If not with this person , then another will come along to test your courage. If you ask that person then, you will find out more than if you ask others what to do.
If they don't stop after you tell them you hurt by them talking behind your back about you, then they are not worth having as a friend, unless you are the type who lets people walk over you and you make it OK. How much do you want to hurt Becky? Rev. TomCat

Answer 4

She must have low self-esteem. But now you are talking about her behind her back, on one of the largest Internet sites in the world. HM......I would just confront her and go from there. Gossip might be the only kind of social skills that she has. Teacher to have more self-esteem and make sure she knows you don't like her doing that. Then if she is still a back-stabber. Ditch her!

Answer 5

I just went through the same thing you are going through. My best friend for the past six years always lied to her other friends & told their secrets. Then I realized if she does that to them she was probably doing the same thing to me.

I was right & the lies continued & I would just ignore them because I'm a non-confrontational person. Eventually I got tired of all the lies and I wrote her a letter about it, even pointing out specific lies that I know she told me, but she denied everything. That just made me more upset.

I decided to gradually delete her from my life. I still have the Christmas gift I bought her, that's how long it has been since I saw her. She writes me sometimes, but I usually don't reply. It's unhealthy to keep toxic people in your life.

You should confront her about it & if things don't change, then slowly start to delete her. It's really a relief to have her out of my life. My life is much better without all the added stress she brought.

Answer 6

D_U_M_P H_E_R... dont even WASTE ur time tryin to change her cuz its never gonna happen! she does this to everyone and not just u then u cant change her! its something normal to her or actually maybe something she doesnt realize is as bad as everyone else. and once hse sees taht all her friends and the ppl she knows stop bein her friend she will realize what happened and she will clean up her act. and then if she REALLY thought that ur friendship was worth something to keep for many many years to come she would come back to u for the time being leaver her alone if she asks u y u dont speak to her anymore tell her bluntly and straight out exactly y and if she denies it tell her that its true and if she doesnt come to realize it soon she is gonna lose a whole bunch of friends and just ppl she knows...good luck to u

Answer 7

I'd watch what you do/say around her presence....that's all....she's creating her own bad Karma...let it stay with her...without you. She's not a nice person to have to talk about others...she has self esteem issue and is just trying to get attention in all the wrong ways. If no changes are seen, you'll be glad that you're not involved with her. Nobody deserves to be disrespected except for those that have to start trouble.

Answer 8

dump her. especially if she talks about you. she cant be trusted and other people might htink you do the same thing. just leave her out of everything. dont be friends, cause it sounds like she is causing drama. if you want to fix things. tell her how you feel. if she was a true friend, she would want to change and keep you as a friend. if not, just dont even try. its too hard and complicated, plus it could all go wrong.

Answer 9

If she talks behind everyone back, she is not nice. Try to help her change. If she does not (must probable) dump her. Don't wait.

Answer 10

I would dump her. I mean even if you try to explain how you feel, it could just cause her to get mad and spread a bad rumor about you or something. Life is too short to spend it with people who can't be real enough not to talk about their friends behind their back.