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I'm writing for my sister as I dont have a clue how to help her...Hoping some feedback from everyone will help!

My sister's Mother In Law is a big annoyance.She is a nice lady and means well but she is alot to take.She is actively religious (which is fine-but my sister isnt) and is very pushy in her beliefs in general. My sister is the type of person that likes to have arranged plans/notice and does not like "drop by's"...(she worked shift work up to now w/ maternity leave).His parents will do anything to get their foot in the door, show up uninvited and will not leave! Suttle hints does not work with these people..Anywhere from a 4-7 hour visit every time.She has talked with her husband about this and he says that thats the way his parents are.She doesnt want to put him in the 'middle' but her blood boils now everytime they come over (which is now frequent as my sister is due soon) and its their first grandchild! And she is afraid she is going to lose her temper and hurt feelings.

2007-04-02 14:08:45 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting Adolescent

7 answers

Just saying "that's the way they are" isn't gonna cut it. He sounds like he doesn't really get bothered by the visits. To get it to stop so your sis can get a break once in awhile, your sis AND her hubby need to sit down and talk this out. They need to be 100% on the same page so it doesn't look like the pregnant hormonal lady is kicking them out. They probably mean well, but she needs a break. The next time they come over, providing your sis and her hubby have talked, they can say something along the lines of "we love seeing you so often and feel blessed that our child will be close to his/her grandparents, but right not so-and-so needs a break since she's pregnant and we'd just appreciate a call a day or more in advance if you plan on coming over." They need to talk it out and decide if it bothers them enough to come out and say something about it. Good luck!

2007-04-02 14:17:44 · answer #1 · answered by Sirius's Mommy 3 · 0 0

hey my sister has the same problem with her inlaws. i thought i would never hear the end of her troubles, and i didnt until my own child came. my sister just dodged the monster in law as best as she could. she would call the beast up and see what was in store for the day on her end. then if it sounded like she would be coming her way my sister would call and we would go get a rolly polly sandwich. if dodging dont work look at this way that monster will be the first to help out when that little baby wont stop crying at night and or your sister is sick and needs a break. just tell her to hang in there and that it will slow down. another thing is like the other advise to tell the hubby HEY i cant do both tell your family to GET ON. and let us be and get adjusted for a while. hey honesty hurts sometimes but is worth it in the end. good luck

2007-04-02 14:23:24 · answer #2 · answered by Brittany M 1 · 0 0

I think they should flat out tell them "We really enjoy your company and you are great people to visit, but we are at a very busy time right now, and would really appreciate it if you didn't drop in on us during work because we constantley have things going on." I think the truth is always the best way to go.

2007-04-02 14:13:37 · answer #3 · answered by Emma B 2 · 1 0

Sounds like the in--laws from Everybody Loves Raymond. If subtle hints don't work, her husband doesn't do anything about it and she really can't take it anymore, she may have to just sit down and have a chat with them.

2007-04-02 14:12:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Oh my goodness, I was just on my way out. I was going to have lunch with my friends. Let me walk you to the door.

I have a doctor's appointment in 15 minutes, and I'm running late. I'll give you guys a call when I get back.

2007-04-02 14:16:37 · answer #5 · answered by phamy76 4 · 0 1

I also follow the advice on Raymod - the liquid earplugs - my choice was wine. If she's 21 or older, have a drink - not to get drunk, but to take the edge off :)

2007-04-02 14:25:32 · answer #6 · answered by lillilou 7 · 0 0

How lots i like those monster-in-regulation issues. No. i'm mendacity. i like analyzing the solutions to the nightmare-in-regulation issues. exceedingly when I examine "purely manage it. that's what marriage involves. Be the greater ideal guy or woman,etc." Having been by it, my reaction to those variety of solutions is easy. Crap. it truly is much less complicated suggested than carried out to be waiting to submit with that. For the millionth time i will in no way understand why mothers and dads experience the might desire to interfere of their youngster's lives. Or greater ideal yet, why they might might desire to make their teenagers "go with" between their spouses and themselves. there is two words for oldsters like that. selfish and ignorant. i'm specific they might have enjoyed it if their mothers and dads did that to them. and perhaps they did so that they experience it truly is advantageous for them to do it to their teenagers. unhappy. Your concern is the two divided between your nightmare-in-regulations and your husband. For some unknown reason, many men are scared to offend their mothers and dads. in no way understood that and in no way will. I wish i ought to permit you recognize what to do yet there's no common answer. I basically know that when a guy does not guard his spouse, in any way, he will become much less of a guy in her eyes. the unhappy section is that maximum men do no longer understand that. "What do you go with me to do?' is commonly the reaction from them. If we are saying "Be a guy" the you-know-what hits the fan. it style of feels okay to be belittled by ability of his mothers and dads yet no longer by ability of his spouse. in case you're like me, sooner or later you will attain your cut back. Your endurance will say 'sufficient already." that may not sturdy. the respond lies which contain your husband. tell him even nevertheless he will continuously be their son, he's your husband on the instant. Act like one.

2016-11-25 21:55:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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