Please Answer> How do you go about having the "talk" with a guy you have been c'ing?

Question

We have gone out on four dates in a months time. talk on msn. make out a lot. I want to know how I talk with him and find out if he sees himself as having a relationship with me or if I'm just someone he wants to have sex with? When is the best time (scenario) to have this convo...
I also think he may make a move for oral sex in the near future and I don't want to do that unless we are in a relationship... how do i go about talking with him about these concerns... I definately don't want to force him into a relationship or make him feel pressured in any way... i want this to be a positive convo to bring us closer.
thanks a ton

Answer 1

Feel free to use this script verbatim:

Hey, I've really enjoyed going out with you and I've had a good time. But I wouldn't feel comfortable going any further unless we had a more substantial relationship. If that's not what you're looking for, I understand. We can continue as we are, but I'll level with you: I'm not interested in sex* unless I'm with a steady partner. I want to know what you're looking for and what you expect from me.

*yes, oral sex counts in this context