I filed my divorce back in Nov., didn't follow through with it because we were trying to work it out. He stopped drinking but now has recently started again. He got a DWI, he takes off with his friends and doesn't come home sometimes. Why do I continue to let him treat me that way. I want out, I'm scared, I love him but he always blames me for everything that goes wrong in his life. I don't understand why I'm always trying to make things better when the problem isn't me. I want to break the cycle and just move on, I'm tired of going backward. I want to move ahead!
2007-04-02 05:28:32 · 12 answers · asked by FEDUP!! 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
File again and this time make sure you follow up. Of course he blames you, why should he blame his self when he has you for that. I dislike saying this about anyone, but he is a deadbeat who likes to drink and not take anything or anyone in consideration. If he hasn't by now stopped his drinking he won't until he gets stopped again or kills someone due to his foolish. You can break this cycle, it sounds as if your a strong woman and all you have to do is think about you and no one else. Loving someone doesn't always mean they are meant for us, if it makes you sick and hurt it is a type of love you need.
2007-04-02 05:36:51 · answer #1 · answered by Krinta 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did you file and have the papers served? Check with the clerk of the court to find out the disposition and request a new court date if it has been put off calendar. The papers will have to be served again or mailed with the new court date. If the court closed it you will have to start all over again. Finish it this time, some couples do marry the same person again.
2007-04-02 12:46:57 · answer #2 · answered by YaWhoDee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats good you are finally fed up with this behavior... but talk is cheap and youare doing alot of it and by the looks of it you did a lot of talking in the past but didnt back it up and follow through with the divorce... you gonna have 2 stay strong, hold your grounds, and put your plan into action... only when you get so fed up where you absolutely cant take it no more will you stop talkin and do the walkin
2007-04-02 12:37:21 · answer #3 · answered by Im da Example 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might want to look into Al-Anon as it sounds like he is an alcoholic. As such, he is immature and will blame others for ALL his problems. It is hard to be in a relationship like that as you have to remember he is not reliable and you cannot expect him to be; he cannot control his drinking, nor can you; you didn't cause his drinking so you are not supposed to fix it nor do you have the power to fix it. You have to let him sink when he does things like not go to work, gets arrested, doesn't pay his bills, etc. . . You are not responsible. Most folks feel they are helping the alcoholic when in fact they are hurting them as it is called enabling.
As to why you let him treat you that way? I don't know. Do some soul searching and write it down. All I can say is this, if you choose to stay with him, you have to "disconnect" and Al-Anon can help you do that.
Good luck.
2007-04-02 12:36:05 · answer #4 · answered by Stefka 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're trying to resue him from a life that he either doesn't want to be resued from or can't be taken out of. If you don't think he can or is going to change leave him and move on. Because eventually (if he hasn't already) he will take you down with him.
2007-04-02 12:45:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u know what u got to do, if u care about your-self then yes you do need to leave him, its not good that is is putting u threw this. i know its going to be hard, its always hard when u leave a relationship. i mean after all u fell in love with him, but the way he is treating u is not right. my husband doesnt drink but he is verbally abusive to me and u know what i wont leave him either. and u know why i cant bring my-self to leave him? its because when ever we argue, i always think back to all the good times we have had, and i cant help but think that we will have more, you know what i mean. i hope things work out for u. good luck!!!!!
2007-04-02 12:37:30 · answer #6 · answered by greengrass 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get this person out of your life and move on. He is toxic to you and is undermining your right to dignity and self-worth.
Sign those papers and start over. It sounds like you're ready, but are feeling guilty. You have done nothing wrong and have nothing to feel guilty about.
Good luck to you.
2007-04-02 12:37:47 · answer #7 · answered by wsibwigu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart baby, DON'T PUT UP WITH SH..IT YOU DON'T HAVE TO. I TRY TO STRESS THIS TO SOME OF MY FRIENDS. LIFE IS TOO SHORT AND A MAN WILL DRIVE YOU CRAZY IN YOU MANS SITUATION. HE WILL CONTINUE TO DRIVE YOU CRAZY IF YOU LET HIM.
PLEASE GET SOME HELP, THE PROBLEM IS NOT YOU IT'S HIM BUT GUESS WHAT, A PERSON CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH, AND YOU WILL FLIP THE FU__CK OUT. SO GET OUT.
2007-04-02 15:56:37 · answer #8 · answered by mona75243 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
check on what the status is of the divorce from nov. and go from there
2007-04-02 12:35:44 · answer #9 · answered by KRISTEN S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So go ahead with the divorce..
2007-04-02 12:32:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋