How can I be honest with family of the baby I watch?

Question

I have been babysitting an infant now for about 2 weeks and I am finding it too much to handle. I have a 4 month old and the baby is 2 months old. I find myself exhausted and I am finding it hard when two babies need my attention at the same time. My daughter can fall asleep on her own and she usually nurses for 15 minutes. The baby girl that I watch needs lots of help to fall asleep and she takes an hour to feed, at which point my daughter usually wants my attention. I thought I could handle the situation but I over estimated my abilities. I feel awful and almost guilty that I am letting this really nice family down. How can I break it to them? Will they understand?

Answer 1

You're just going to have to tell them. Soon. Before you collapse out of exhaustion, in time for them to find a new sitter.

Good luck to you and your little one.

Answer 2

It is really difficult now because she is only two weeks, but in another two weeks she will be a month and probably taking less time to feed and feeding less often. My suggestion is to stick with it two more weeks. Let the family know now that you are having difficulty and that you are going to try for another two weeks to see what happens. It should get easier very quick, as you have figured out with your daughter. Plus your daughter will be able to play more independently as she develops. By six months my daughter was able to hang out on the floor and play independently for a half hour. Look at some products for twins and see what's out there to make your life easier. Mothers who have twins don't just free ball it. Your not a miracle worker.You should see whats out there and the family should pay for most of it. You can use a boppy pillow on the floor and feed the two week old with one hand while entertaining your four month old. They also make this special apron that holds the bottle so you can have free hands and even hold your daughter and her at the same time on your lap.I picked up all sorts of tricks when I watched a two year old who demanded alot of attention and his newborn brother. If your daughter isn't sitting yet, the bumbo seat is great. She can sit up and play if she is sick of laying down. Old MacDonald and Baby Neptune from Baby Einstein entertain my daughter for a good while. She loves them. Does the family have baby items that would be good for your daughter? If you have a play gym, an excersaucer and some floor space you can rotate your daughter so she will last longer. See if the parents will help you out by looking into some of the products to help the day go by more smoothly. I think you should wait a couple of weeks though. It should get easier. You have to figure out a system.

Answer 3

You will just have to tell them in the nicest way that it is to much to handle all the time. They should understand, knowing that they do have 1 baby and that is a lot of work on its own. If it was me, I would tell them and then also tell them that you will continue watching the baby for a couple of weeks until they could find someone else that would be willing to take on an infant.

Answer 4

Well, Dear; just tell the family that you love watching their baby and yours together but the responsiblity of both girls is too much and is draining you. I know its hard to break it to them but its not as bad as it seems once you break the ice. They may be a little hurt but they should be understanding and see where you're coming from.Tell them that it has been a good opportunity and that when the girls get a little older maybe you could watch them again, if you want to leave on a more soothing note. It's entirely up to you if you want to go that route as offering that but its kinda saying that you liked what you did and you would like to come back later. That leaves them somewhat more relaxed and calm with your decision. I think that they'll be alot more understanding when you have a chat over not being able to watch both girls. If you explain yourself and how you feel, then I'm positive they'll see it from your perspective. Good Luck!

Answer 5

I'm sure they would rather you tell them the truth, then have them drop their baby off every day and it not be getting the attention it deserves from a mom that has more attention to spare. It is also not fair to your baby either.
I too am going into daycare but I will only watch kids that are at least 2 so they can play with my older son while I take care of my infant daughter.

Answer 6

I have a four month old baby and can completely understand how tired you must be feeling. I've just been passed by OFSTED and was not allowed to take on any babies under 1yr old and I totally agree with them. You are going to have to be upfront with the family and stop feeling guilty!! They are going to be more upset if they realise you are not able to give their baby as much time as they would like. Ask them to get in touch with this children's information service (find the No on the internet) who can give them a list of childminders who can offer the one to one care a baby needs.

Answer 7

I'm sure both you and the baby's family want what's best for both of your children and they will appreciate your honesty in telling them that it's too much for you. I'm a stay-at-home mom with a 21 month old and a 4 month old and it's insane! I'm sure they will be able to find someone else to care for their baby who has more time to devote to their child. You don't want to miss out on precious time with your own little one either. Don't put the feelings of others before your own family. Hope this helps!

Answer 8

Honesty is the best policy. Sit down with them and let them know of the issues. Allow them a certain period of time to fin a replacement sitter, like two weeks or something. Sharing your concerns with them may actually be respected by them. If there was a problem with the care of their child, they probably would be grateful to know about it and then take responsible actions regarding it, rather than being left in the dark about the care of their child.

Answer 9

they should understand and if they don't they arent worth it. If you can't do it, dont stress, nobody benifits from that!! Just tell them you need to talk and give them enough time to find another daycare!! Tell them it's not them or the baby, you just didnt realize how hard it would be and have too much on your plate at once! Everything should be fine and you are doing the right thing by backing out before you get to your wits end! GOod luck and congrats on your baby!

Answer 10

I am going to be doing the same type of thing after my child is born. I have actually taken on another one as well. With both families before I even agreed I let them know that if it does in fact turn out to be too much for me that I will tell them very straightforwardly. i would just mention the fact the you are sure they want the best possible care for their child, and that you are afraid that you just can;t provide that right now. Good Luck

Answer 11

As a mother myself, I would rather you tell me you think the job is too much and give your notice than stay in the situation and eventually find yourself frustrated. Babies pick up on that and I'm not saying you would be mean to my baby, but I would rather know now and find someone else. I would break the news to them in a professional matter and make sure they know it is not them or their child, it is just that it is too much and you find it better to part ways. With me, that would be leaving on good terms.