Is there something seriously wrong with me? Am I a normal human with emotions?

Question

Looking to change and become a better person.
FORGETFULNESS
Irritated easily
Great amount of ANGER
LOW CONFIDENCE
LACK OF FOCUS
DAYDREAM a lot
Want to tell people to “F” off
Over Sensitive
Do things without thinking about the consequences
No longer care about my grades, when from an “A: student to someone who is failing.
Just want to relax.
Push myself too hard?
Cry a lot (Music brings this out of me)
Intense moments of emotion (seem unbearable)
Been in a few uncomfortable situations that caused me to “ckeck out”
Get bored easily
No physical problems
LOSE TRACK OF TIME
I don’t love myself
I deserve pain
I’m afraid
Bitchy
Can’t keep up with the “HAPPY PERSON” appearance
I think I’m dangerous?
I think about death, but would never do it.
FEEL LIKE I’M FOOLING MYSELF AND EVERYONE ELSE.
What to sit down and listen to music all day, get my passion back.
Travel

I was very focused, cared greatly about people. My attitude changes constantly. It all depends on what triggers it. I don’t want help from my friends. Just want to be alone and do the things that I enjoy. Find myself. I have moments where I regret things. Feel that things are not in my control. Don’t have patience, have possible fear, unresolved conflicts from my past.

I SAW A COLLEGE COUNSELOR, BUT I BECAME WORSE.

I"M GOING TO GO TO THE PSYCHIATRIST AND SEE IF THEY CAN GIVE ME DRUGS. THEY ARE GREAT AT EASILy handing out drugs. I need a quick fix to get my grades back up.

Answer 1

I am a person who understands how you feel, at least to some extent. I am a little embarrassed to reveal this about me. I don't always feel these things but when I do, I know that the base of it is my personality which formed this way when I was a child. I have an avoidant personality disorder, I have low self-worth and am prone to depression, I get a lot of suicidal thoughts because I get hopeless and despairing not being able to find meaning in my life at times, these pass though and then I am content again. I have so much in my life, but I only see the negative. I have a good, and loving husband, healthy children, and a decent home but I always find what is wrong with all that I have and pity poor me because I get lonely and because I feel I don't fit in anywhere. I don't take drugs or talk to a therapist although I know I ought to talk to someone, I am pretty sure pharmaceuticals is just going to mask the problems and bury it. I mostly accept myself this way and so I can be content most of the time, but the times that I can't stand myself is when I get depressed. I know that I am a good and decent person, I have a pretty good life, although dull and empty of friends and family most of the time, it is the life of a loner and we loners get used to it, in fact, need to be alone. Maybe all of these things you are discovering about yourself have always been there, as long as you are not hurting anyone else, learn to accept yourself for who you are and try to find peace, remember suffering comes from our attachments to people and things and from desiring and striving too much and too hard, maybe you just need to find your center, who you are, and chill with that.

Answer 2

start telling yourself the truth.
you are depressed and there is an origin,
what is it?
start telling the world the truth?
sometimes when we are hurting we cannot tell the world why, so we create for the world myriad reasons in the form of micro drama or even grandiose lies, we replace the pain and give it a face that people will understand.
pain is transient, this will pass, see a doctor and not just for drugs, talk to someone. anxiety sucks and can lead to very bad decision making. be careful of that. a therapist may be able to help you with that
you don't stop caring about people, you just grow more capable of forgetting.
see someone professionally and do not let a bad experience turn you away from therapy, tell the truth, take responsibility for your actions. figure out how to be happy the real way, by working really hard at it like everyone has too, so in that sense take a breather, you are nothing but normal.
good luck to you

Answer 3

Well, I identify with at least 60% of the symptoms you describe. So, if we are the base, than you are absolutely normal.
I look at your list and I can definitely say - this is a human with feeling, and perhaps passion.
There is a hint of anti-social behavior. To that I say, we have all of these religions that follow the path of their particular teacher. And, one of the similarities I see in these teachers is that they had to spend some time outside of society and away from people to reach their ultimate truth.
Maybe you're feeling that this world is becoming less and less compatible with the human biology and the needs of people. Maybe you're experiencing a reaction to some misunderstood component in our food supply.
As far as punishment, maybe you are an *** who needs his *** beaten, but probably not. It's a little concerning, though. If you are dreaming in red, that could become a problem. So, you have to stop that on your own.
You want to go on, and you should go on, because you are a witness and now a conduit to what is true in this world. Most people are afraid to even acknowledge the type of truth that you have shared here.

Thank You

Answer 4

you are depressed hun, seeing a counsellor would make you feel worse because you are confronting your problems. Good advice has been given already such as eating a healthy diet. Leave the junk food out it causes chemical reactions in the brain. Drink plenty of water, don't watch tv or play computer games at least an hour before bedtime and get at least 8 hours sleep. Also go back to your counsellor and doc. You might need to have some meds to get you out of this hole.

Answer 5

You did not say what year of college you are in. You may be suffering a lot from stress, or something may have happened to trigger these strong emotions. You really should see a qualified therapist to talk things out, and a doctor to help with meds if necessary. You may have a mix of generalized anxiety, depression---but you also need to see a doctor to rule out physical problems too!

Best Wishes!

Answer 6

Drugs won't give you a quick fix. All anti-depressants take a while for your body to get used to. It usually takes months to get up to a dosage that makes you feel entirely better. I know from experience. Definitely talk to a psychiatrist. It helps you get your thoughts straight.

Answer 7

If you can make a list of your problems, you can solve them.

I cannot make a list of my problems. I don't even remember the name of the planet I am typing this on. When I get into a funk, weird @#$% starts flyin, like ice skates, only minus the melting summer days and red weasel. Weasel means pain for Zeek, weasel come, weasel go. Flying away. Not a happy person losing track of time. Traveling back home but not home again. Get out of school if you must but only if you must. You must suffer into truth to know the dread suffering of those lying at our feet. We crush them with our heavy tears while they smile at our beautiful shins. We think them horrid, they think us lovely. REMEMBER THAT! The longer we think we are in pain, the longer the noble flesh dies at our feet. Go and fight, the hour of Guildenstern is nigh. The hour for suffer is near and we must, you must find them. Hold them tight. Learn what you can so you can build wings on their bony backs. They were starved so their wings can't carry them anymore. Please do not let them die. Help me carry them. Please?

Answer 8

Sounds like me for the most part. Drugs arn't the answer. Don't pop a pill everytime you think something is wrong

Answer 9

Try volunteering. Maybe seeing the joy you bring to someone else will help you unlock the joy inside yourself.

Answer 10

Psychiatrist sounds like the thing to do, you sound like you have depression and meds will help.