**ok, here's the story: I was with guy A all through High School, and after we graduated, he went in the Army, we were going to stay together, we got engeged. I moved to a "college party town" and met guy B ~ we liked eachother. I broke up with guy A before he went to Iraq- and then a month later guy B and I got pregnant.
NOW~ 3 years later, we have a 2 year old, and recently got married. Guy A is engaged (and in Iraq again)
I love my husband a lot, and we have a great family together, but I still can't stop feeling like we aren't "in love" like I was with my first love.
Am I just feeling like this because he is engaged?
I just don't feel that same thing. Like, never want to let go, or say goodbye, etc...
Any Ideas?
2007-04-01 16:56:56 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Talk very nice to your husband, be a sweet as possible. He will return the favor and you will be totally in love.
2007-04-01 17:01:06 · answer #1 · answered by shadouse 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be because guy A is engaged to someone there are times that we all want things that we can't have. But you need to think about it did you feel that way about your husband before or after you found out guy A got engaged? I wish you the best and hope everything works out in your marriage!
2007-04-01 17:02:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel what you've done to Guy A was wrong... BUT, that's my personal opinion on something that is none of my business.
To answer your question, did you and guy A EVER say goodbye? Was guy A your first real bf?
Those could be part of the reason why u feel like that. Then again, there's nothing wrong with being good friends with guy A, so long as you keep it "good friends". Remember, you've got to let go of him as your "love". Good luck.
2007-04-01 17:02:50 · answer #3 · answered by daytonafun_tim 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have a child with guy B, then forget about guy A. Put your love into your child and your husband. Use your energy to make your family grow stronger over time. Even though you might not feel "in love", you can still act like you are. That "in love" feeling almost always fades with time and you are left with family love after that. Good luck.
2007-04-01 17:05:05 · answer #4 · answered by J D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've made your choice, live with it.
Yes, hearing about an old beau being engaged will make your feel nostalgic.
Before you even consider changing your situation, consider the consequences - at least five lives devastated. You, your husband, your child, him and his fiancee. And if you think the ripping apart would be worth it think again. The guilt and remorse of that action would poison your relationship forever.
I suggest you treasure those memories, and keep in mind that you are living with your choices - and so is he.
2007-04-01 17:03:06 · answer #5 · answered by heart o' gold 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is something that requires nourishment and effort, like a seed in the soil that needs care. if you give it attention, it will grow and blossom. If you take it for granted, it will stagnate and whither. High school loves are new, exciting, a unique learning experience for most as it is their first experience with love. Look at your life with your husband and see how you can make it unique, new , exciting and an adventure. Water the plant.
2007-04-02 17:11:29 · answer #6 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you r just being human ... you r never satisfied with whatever you got ... you always want more or something that does not belong to you ... even if now you break up and go to this guy A ... after that you might again feel that guy B was better in some sense and you should go back to him
Now instead of messing up your own life by yourself ... you do one thing whatever you feel is lacking in your life or marriage ...try adding that to it and be happy ... knowing and adding ... that way your life will be more interesting, challenging and you will also start loving cause you have changes to enjoy ... changes are always enjoying and refreshing ... so its always good ! ... try it out !
2007-04-01 17:03:40 · answer #7 · answered by SD 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like you want your cake, but don't want your first love to have his. You sound like you're upset that Guy A moved on. If you have a happy family with Guy B, then don't sit around star-gazing on Guy A. Focus on your husband before some other woman (maybe HIS first love) recognizes that you're not giving him your all.
2007-04-01 17:02:22 · answer #8 · answered by dr. shan 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is anything the same as your first? You will feel different about your first boyfriend. your first child, your first kiss, your first trip to disney world even though disney world hasn't changed in the last 20 years! The first time is new...so same thing with your hubby. You and your first boyfriend obvioiusly broke up for a dang good reason, and you and your husband married for a reason,,,,remenber that reason and if that reason still exsists then cherrish it....my reason really doesn't exisit....I'm drunk.
2007-04-01 17:01:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm not an expert on relationships, but this might help. I think you should talk to your husband about it. Marriage is a relationship based on trust, don't let your husband give a chance to doubt that trust. It might be really hard for you to say it, but let it out.
2007-04-01 17:11:03 · answer #10 · answered by Syedah A 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋