Something told me to look at a pile of envelopes on the dresser of his, and I saw/found the paternity test he took. It was dated for early last week and its positive.
How do I keep myself from going crazy and how do i bring this up to him? because when i see him at this point im punching the **** out of him, im mad, upset, and frustrated.
Also, can the mother put a hypenated last name on the baby, without the father signing to do so? such as Baby Her last name-his last name.
2007-04-01 07:57:26 · 19 answers · asked by SouthCackalacky 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We will have been together a whole year at the end of April.
He and his ex had broken up the end of march and he said the last time he slept with her was the 2nd week in april of 06.
the girl didn't even find out she was preg. until dec. of 07, already at 7 1/2 months, i guess with stress and the news she gave birth like early dec.
i havent been told the exact dates of her due date, but he says it was the mid. of feb that she was due.
i did know about the situation as soon as he got news about it, but i was ASSUMING that he would tell me the results AS SOON AS he got the results...
2007-04-01 08:11:08 · update #1
Get out while you can.
2007-04-01 08:00:57 · answer #1 · answered by NickyO 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you're looking through his stuff there are already problems with the relationship. Trust issues being the first and for most. i'm not saying you did wrong just saying if something told you to look you already had reasons not to trust him. You two need to sit and really talk about the relationship. the results of your paternity test are the least of your problems. if neither of you can get past the trust issue you should both find someone you can trust. Without it no relationship will come to any good.
2007-04-01 08:03:10 · answer #2 · answered by trickstersdaughter 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Confront him about it because he shouldn't be keeping things from you especially something as serious as a paternity test. Decide whether you want to go through the baby mama drama - if you don't, time for you to get out now. And yes, the mother can name the baby whatever she wants even more so since the baby is his.
2007-04-01 08:03:25 · answer #3 · answered by Cambrianna S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he is the father then the child has every right to his last name hyphenated or not. Dont be selfish and hurt this child to save your feelings. If he is hiding and lying then you need to find someone else. Honesty is always the better way to go and if he isn't then he never will.
Also, why did you not leave when you found out in April that he was still sleeping with her?
2007-04-01 08:03:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you knew about the test, but just didn’t know that he’d gotten the results. Is that correct? He probably didn’t tell you yet because he’s still trying to absorb the information and figure out how to tell you. You shouldn't have been snooping, you should have ASKED him, “Did you get the results?” So, do that.
And yes, (if you live in the U.S.) Mom can give the child any last name that she chooses.
2007-04-01 08:12:30 · answer #5 · answered by kp 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you can hypenate it as far as I know. I have a friend who did it that way.
As for your BF, forgive him instantly if he hooked up with her BEFORE you. But, if he didn't he has some explaining to do!!!!
Ok....how you bring it up to him is to sit down with him in a privet place,CALMLY explain to him what you found and let him tell you everything. Try not to let him pin it on you because you were looking at his stuff....you have a better argument then him.
Good luck with this and hopefully it will all work out :-)
2007-04-01 08:08:06 · answer #6 · answered by brybry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. To be dating a man with a child is okay. To be dating a man with a child that he hasn't told you about is NOT okay. You didn't mention how long you've been dating, or how old the child is. But if you do the math and figure out that he cheated on you, LEAVE NOW. He's a pig, and you deserve better.
2007-04-01 08:02:55 · answer #7 · answered by Samantha 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Number one, you had no right snooping through HIS private mail. You're not married to him so basically you broke the law.
Secondly the mother of the baby can put whatever last name, hyphenated, in quotations, underscored that she wants to put on the birth certificate, she doesn't need ANYONE'S permission to do so, especially not YOUR'S...get over yourself. You broke the law because you're a jealous spoiled brat.
2007-04-01 08:51:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, my boyfriend now, is not dealing with something of the same situation. he refuses to be a man about that and everything else. so for me i may dump him. i feel you, but i would leave. sorry. i'm not into the hood rat/baby mama drama. find someone else. when you leave just be like" when you care to be honest and tell me what is really going on, then maybe we can talk.until then i gotta go." sorry.
2007-04-01 10:16:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The mother can do whatever she wants--she can even use his last name without hers at all.
Is this YOUR boyfriend? Are you sure???
Maybe you ought to dump him while the matter is still in doubt. Who knows where he might be having unprotected sex at this very moment? I'm not worried about you punching him; I'm worried about the punching he's doing to your heart.
You deserve better . . . look at the bright side--at least it's not YOU that's pregnant by this guy.
2007-04-01 08:04:18 · answer #10 · answered by nora22000 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't play his game go ahead and ask for an explanation. If he made the baby while he was with you, you should really think about moving on. He had absolutely no respect for you and your relationship.
2007-04-01 08:38:41 · answer #11 · answered by Truth Hurts 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋