2007-03-31 12:58:32 · 18 answers · asked by mo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
now i dont know what to do,i have met someone, what do i do?
2007-03-31 13:01:22 · update #1
fulfill the better or for worse part of those vows you took before you leave him, b there for him till he is better just like he would do for you
2007-03-31 20:02:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You were obviously unhappy if you wanted to leave your marriage. I guess its a conscience vote here.....you can leave him and he has another heart attack and he dies, or you can leave him and he makes a full recovery. Guilt is a hard thing to live with, and if anything happened to him, I am sure you would feel terrible. It's very hard to see things logically when you feel you have to stay in a situation because of another person's needs. Most people think totally emotionally under these circumstances. Was it a big heart attack? How had he treated you previous to the heart attack? These are very relevant questions. If it wasnt a major heart attack and out of guilt you stay, then your husband will use his health to always keep you where he wants you. I dont know your personal situation.....all I can say is that we have one shot at this life.....we can stay to make another person happy, or we can leave to make ourselves happy. I guess all you can do is weigh up the good against the bad and make your decision that way. People have heart attacks in a "happy" marriage, so dont put the blame exclusively on your shoulders. No-one can say you made him have a heart attack. How many marriages break up where the one being hurt hasnt had a heart attack? Not many people will have a heart attack when their marriage breaks up......its a medical condition.....maybe stress doesnt help it, but you were not the total reason for his heart attack. Maybe if you could stop blaming yourself you would be able to see a little bit clearer. Maybe your husband doesnt deserve your loyalty. What are the reasons you were planning to leave your marriage? I'm sure you were not alone in making that decision. I am sure your husband would have played an important role in you wanting to leave your marriage. Unfortunately he had a heart attack......dont let that be the sole reason you stay with him. You deserve to be happy too.
2007-03-31 13:14:52 · answer #2 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that you need to be honest. Did he know you were leaving? If yes, tell him that you will stay with him until he gets on his feet, unless he doesn't want you to, and then you will be moving on. It also depends on how long you were married with him, and the reasons that you are leaving. Was it without malice or hatred? Cut the guy some slack and don't leave a hurt(wounded) man down. Take the higher road and do what you can do for him now. Not only will you feel good as a person, your integrity and respect will follow you and those that are watching you and your situation. Good luck.
2007-03-31 13:05:57 · answer #3 · answered by Nisey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are married, so you don't fool around! You took marriage vows. You try to work things out with your husband first, and do not start a new relationship unless your divorce is finalized!
2007-03-31 13:07:12 · answer #4 · answered by Yahoo Con 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your sure you want to leave its best to go. Do tell him whats going on and if he is in hospital ask doctor to be present just in case he has another one. Do know all will think you are heartless but it's best not to live a lie and give hope where there is none.
2007-03-31 13:08:00 · answer #5 · answered by ascendent2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave. you've obviously have been cheating on him so why stay now. i'm not being mean i'm just being real. everyone's gonna know what you've been up to anyway when they see you w/ this new person. but he does have a right to hear it from you. and trust me he knows so don't assume you weren't the cause of it. when a partner is straying trust we all know. just move on w/ your life. ypu're never gonna come out it not looking like the bad guy anyway. since you did CHEAT. he's better off w/o YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-31 13:16:01 · answer #6 · answered by freedom fighter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should probably wait. Don't try to deceive him. Be honest. Tell him you don't want to be with him anymore and his heart attack is not going to change that. I'm sure he knows how you feel already.
2007-03-31 13:02:56 · answer #7 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your first, of many, mistake was seeing someone while you were still married. You now stay married, buck up, get mature and stay with your husband.
2007-03-31 15:02:15 · answer #8 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go and live your life. your husbands health can not be the sole reason for staying in a marriage that you were prepared to leave.
2007-03-31 13:32:13 · answer #9 · answered by simplyme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
even if your hubby did not know about your affair, he probably could feel there was something wrong, which may have caused him stress, and contributed to his heart attack. think it may have well been because of u, and him knowing that something was going on. i would wait on him to feel better before i confronted him with this. u think he didn't know, but people have a sixth sense, their intuition, they always know when something isn't quite right.
2007-03-31 13:06:02 · answer #10 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋