Should i forget, give up or make last attempt to write that email to her?

Question

The situation is, she is a Baptist and i am a Catholic. We are friends and the mutual feelings are there. I am attracted to her after few months primarily because i am impressed by her love for her church and that made me feel secured in her of handling a long term relationship.

i misintepret her sms she sent me 28 days ago saying that though she has feelings for me but we have a/m barrier.

last night i was shock although i didn't feel well since monday, she clarified that due to barrier (our doctrines differences) we can't go any further. i didn't realise this issue as we are still close.

should i just let this relationship fade and end or i should write her an email asking her to give some time for us to work it out. i feel that since both of us worship the same god, there's really not a hindrance to further development.

thus, should i forget, give up just like this or write the email that might not be able to persuade her? i just can't make a right choice.

thanks in advance.

thanks guys for the 6 answers thus far. i just don't feel good in the sense that to write that email may not help but to give her more problems. i mean i do know from christians friends that they really sacrifice for the sake of loving the church. i was just thinking perhaps alot of things might be better if i just leave it unexplained, though both of us feel sad now :=(

appreciate any subsequent for or against answer, but i think i got myself to blame, for having this attitude, for never clarify my doubts as i feel shy to do so.

its sad esp. when i put in my best efforts thing turn otherwise. there's really never an ending in learning for a courtship.

Answer 1

If you really want it to work, it can. My Aunt married a Jewish man, and she's not Jewish. They've been together forever, and they made it work for them both. If you two did date, and are both really into your religions you could both learn about each other's religion, you could go to each other's church's together. This way, you can both have your own beliefs and learn why the other has theirs.

I say email her one last time about it. Explain how you think it could work. And tell her that you're willing to do whatever to make it work. If she turns you down again, drop it. Good luck hun!

Answer 2

OK. I really can identify with both of you, here. I was raised as a Baptist and converted to Catholicism in my late 20's. I understand both doctrines, and yes there are some fundamental differences. Has she considered studying the catechism to determine if she is really opposed to your beliefs? Can she really state exactly which part of the doctrine she has a hard time accepting? Often, protestants get really wigged out by Catholics. The idea of the Holy Eucharist being more than crackers and grape juice is just more than they can get their heads around. The Catholic church is willing to let Catholics marry Protestants as long as they commit to raising the children as Catholics--that upsets a lot of Protestants, too. I just think that she should ask herself if she really understands Catholicism enough to condemn it. If she takes the catechism classes and decides that she cannot deal with it, all she has done is expand her knowledge. If she studies it and decides that Catholics are not such freaks, after all she can consider converting or at least committing to raising any children as Catholics. Best Wishes to you both.

Answer 3

Being a Christian and a Baptist does not mean that you can't be together. I mean, I've liked guys of a different race, and you can make it work out if you really care about each other. If she is that shallow, then it probably will not work out. But talk to her first, and have an open discussion about it.

Answer 4

well lets put in terms that sound the most relivent first off it seems to me like you two really have a connection and letting a connection die is just a tragedy all in itself, secondly i know you two have different religions but last i checked both your gods want both of you to be happy now if that happiness is with eachother i dont see why or how both your religions or gods would have a problem with it and if they did then they arent really your gods and you have nothing to worry about :).

Answer 5

Tell her you would like to first visit with her Pastor and see just how different your beliefs are. and then visit yours. I'll bet with an open mind you both can find some common ground.
(I'm not suggesting seeing the Pastors inferring marriage , but for some education for both of you to hear from the people who have studied their faiths for many years

Answer 6

e mail her and tell her how you feel about her and the situation.
if she still doesn't want to go any further. then move on.
it will do you no good to dwell in the past and keep on hoping for something that will not be.

Answer 7

i would ask her to reconsider. it sounds like a good relationship so go out and get her.

i went out with a die-hard catholic, and i am atheist and i supposedly "use the lords name in vain" too often, he didn't care cuz he really liked me.
you worship the same god so why the hell would it matter?

Answer 8

Why don't you two remain friends and see what happens. It seems that you do not want to let her go. Instead be friends and go from there.

Answer 9

Pray on it. Don't ask a bunch of strangers. Ask before you go to sleep and you will get your answer. Really.

Answer 10

DUDE, Do you love her?? Then go after her. I know many mixed religion married couples. They seam to have worked it out.. Don't wimp out now...*