I want them to live with me but they want to go and live with their dad...they are 5 and 7...so what do i do? and if they go and live with thier dad i cant go and see them...
2007-03-31 10:14:04 · 9 answers · asked by Malinda W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
from the perspective of a child,look at this from their angle.make a list of all the positive things by living with either parent and a list of all negative things by living with either parent be brutally honest about it. Big advice,do not use your kids as material possessions in order to jerk your ex around,in the long run your kids aren't stupid and they will form their own opinions as to parental qualifications.bad mouthing your ex in front of the kids will only serve to plant the seeds of resentment,which will be harvested down the road,besides bad mouthing the ex is so 3rd grade play ground warfare,show you are mature adult.regardless if other parent is doing it ,remember what you plant is what you'll get.encourage your kids to love their other parent regardless of how you feel about them,at this point its about them,not you.the judge usually decides custody issues along with an attorney who can be appointed to represent the best interest of the child,they then make a statement before the court as to who they feel will best serve as a custodial parent,or Even if shared custody is an option,like it or not you now have long term relationship with your ex,you can make it rough for all or you can make it easy on the kids.Again as a product of a divorced family,don't snipe at the ex in front of the kids,it will burn you down the road,your kids may hate you as a result.do be a part of the visitation process if things don't go in your favor.Kids are people too,not a material possession.
2007-03-31 10:46:57 · answer #1 · answered by grizzly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have 3 kids (11,10 & 8) Their dad and I split up when our youngest was about 4.At first they would ask for him all the time and say they wanted to live with him.That was because they saw me all the time and never saw him.They have not seen him in over a year.When you first split up they are afraid-their world is changing but it just takes a little time. They are too young to know if they want to live with him for good-they may just miss him and want to see him. I definitly wouldn't send them to live with him unless you can't take care of them.
2007-03-31 17:23:56 · answer #2 · answered by tscarlettwolf 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce<<
2007-03-31 17:20:45 · answer #3 · answered by BE HAPPY! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are their mother. You make the decisions and they are staying with you. A 5 and 7 yr. old do not know what they want.
Without the mother is totally unfit, then all children belong with their mother.
2007-03-31 17:27:00 · answer #4 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself , what is best for my children, As a parent I always consider this question and review my options, because a child cannot decide what is best for them when they are just children under the age for proper judgement
2007-03-31 17:21:57 · answer #5 · answered by Tennessee Mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well who gave the birth to them? Put your foot down now and keep them with you. Besides you have the control over their decisions until 18 years old
2007-03-31 17:21:05 · answer #6 · answered by krazykat4u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are 5 and 7. Unless you don't want them.....Fight for them. They don't have a choice.
2007-03-31 17:19:25 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them they're where they need to be and will be staying with you. End of discussion.
2007-03-31 17:18:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My parents are divorced and i was force around and was misarable. PLEASE dont do that to your kids. Let them decide for themselves. I know you will miss them but they will hate you, as i do my parents, if you force them to stay.
2007-03-31 17:36:52 · answer #9 · answered by Sam 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋