Should a man be able to tell a woman to have an abortion if he isn't ready to be a father?

Question

I have a controversial question. If a guy has sex with a woman and she finds out that she's pregnant, tells him that she is, so should he tell her to have an abortion if he isn't ready to be a father? I mean, if he is man enough to conceive a baby, he should take care of it right? This is a question that I thought of while reading some related question/answers about the subject of "abortion." I would like to see what everyone thinks about that.

Let me clear something up. I'm not pregnant at all. I was having a discussion and this question came about so I was wanting to get some more opinions on what you think about the situation.

I'm really impressed by everyone's answers. I do appreciate every last one of them.

A lot of strong opinions on here.

Answer 1

I don't think that an abotion would be a wise option. Reason being that it would take the gift of life away from and innocent child! If the guy wasn't ready to be a father, then why did he even sleep with the girl in the first place?? That innocent child should not have to suffer because of an immature guy. I mean that child has nothing to do with this and has to suffer because the guy isn't ready to be a father?? This guy really needs to think long and hard! Case and point.....a guy doesn't even have a right to tell a woman to have an abortion. He's not the one who has to carry the child for 9 months! I think that the woman should have the final say so.

Answer 2

Hi. The guy has a right to say he is not ready to be a father but still the decision on how to take this matter furhter should be made by both of them
Also if you are in that kind of relationship that there is a possibility that you could get pregnant then I feel they might have a serious communication problem here. Either you both consent for unprotected sex and live with the consequences or you just communicate with each other before you even get to that stage of conceiving a child. The possibility is there when a man is not ready for it or it may just have come to soon it might scare him, altough my opinion still is that communication is the key here. Children are a big commitment for both parties involved. And if the case is that the guy really is afraid of becomming a dad or not ready for it, they should be able to talk about it before even conceiving a child. If you are not ready for it, use anticonception till you are ready for it. If either party involved feels that they are trapped and they want to have an abortion because all of a sudden they can't cope with it. I don't think an abortion is a right desicion in that case, talking it over with eachother is still the best and you should not be afraid to communicate with your partner on either subject, if that is the case then it might not be the best enviroment to bring another life into the world.
Scissors cut both ways, so should a desicion be, both parties are concerned here and should try to find a solution that is the best for both of them made by both of them. And there is the matter of the conceived child here, no matter what stage the unborn is in, it is there and should be considered. Also to be considered is the care after you had an abortion, it is not just go to the clinic and get it over with procedure. It can be a very traumatic event and even lead to depression and guilt afterwards. Do bare in mind that this is not as simple as that, there is no simple thing as oops I can't cope with it right now, get rid of it. Just look at the bigger picture and all that it involves and the afterwards.
Well that is how I feel about it, hope it helps, good luck.

Answer 3

A man doesn't necessarily have a right to tell a woman to have an abortion if he's not ready to be a father, but depending on what part of the world he lives in, he has a legal obligation to pay for that child if the woman decides to have the baby anyway. He shouldn't pressure her into it if it's not what she wants. My personal feeling is that no two people should ever have sex if they aren't comfortable with the fact that there's the slightest chance they might create human life as a result of it, no matter how efficiently they use birth control or contraceptives. It's just sad to see men do this to women during unplanned pregnancies, because the woman is generally already confused enough. It's an interesting topic for debate, for sure!

Answer 4

bah! a man CAN'T tell a woman to do ANYTHING. ask my husband! seriously, though. first of all, noone is ever ready to be a parent, man or woman, unwanted pregnancy or planned. so it's not a question of if he's ready to be a father, it's if he wants to be a father. any man who doesn't want to be a father has the option of telling the woman in question he's not interested in being a daddy. if the woman decides to terminate the pregnancy because she doesn't want to be a mommy, everyone's happy. in the case of a woman who chooses to continue the pregnancy, the man in question will probably not be too happy about it, but he still has no obligation to play the part of father if he doesn't want to. if the woman hits him up for child support, he's obligated by law to pay. however, he does have the option to be a deadbeat and not work, or only work low paying jobs, if he can get away with it. personal opinion, if a woman continues with an unwanted/unplanned pregnancy, in spite of the mans' objections and possible urgings to terminate, the woman should get it through her thick skull that she's on her own with this and let the guy alone. it takes two people to make a baby, she's just as responsible as the man if the outcome is pregnancy, and if she's unlucky or stupid enough to have an unreliable/unwilling partner, she's just gotta suck it up and deal with it. if he's "man enough" to get a woman pregnant isn't saying much, when you consider that boys as young as 11 or 12 can get a girl pregnant. morally, a man should take responsibility for his actions, yes, but so should a woman. i really think the controversy in the question comes from what a person considers moral. some men and women think terminating a pregnancy is immoral while others don't. being a woman, faced with this situation, i'd go ahead and have the baby and sue for support and hope i'd get enough money out ouf it to make it worth the trouble, but i certainly wouldn't factor what i may or may not get from him into my budget.

Answer 5

I think your question is a good one. I would say, my position is that no man should ever be able to tell a woman what she can or can not, should or should not do with her body.

If a man fathers a child, and the Great Mystery does not touch that man to own this responsibility, then that man has the right to relinquish his fatherhood, sad as that may be. But to tell the mother, you have to relinquish your motherhood as well is far more power than any man is granted.

I can not say a man, or a woman "should" do anything. Usually these are innate feelings that come out of the moments of passion, shared. However it is a big world and there are many 'circumstances' and perspectives on love-making and the conception that might follow.

We can not place our "shoulds or must" on others. We are not all the same in how we view and value life and love.

Answer 6

First of all, that person was extremely irresponsible for not using protection.Usually I would say he should pay the consequences, but this is a child's life were talking about.If he really believes he can't be a good father he should mention it to the woman(for the sake of the baby), but if he just doesn't want to be a father,then he needs to suck it up and prepare for fatherhood.He needs to remember though, the woman has the final decision weather or not she will go through with an abortion.

Answer 7

First of all, abortion is wrong!!! Everyone has a right to live. Second, no a man does not have a right to tell a woman to have an abortion if he isn't ready to be a father. It's no one's fault besides his that he concieved a baby. And he isn't the one who has to carry the baby around for nine months. So he has no say in what the woman wants to do with her body. Plus, he wants to be a man and concieve a baby he should be a man and raise the baby.

Answer 8

Yes its the womans body but that baby belongs to both of them..tho i dont agree with abortion..they both are equal in the choice..what if the man wants to raise the child but the mom wants to have an abortion..that doesnt seem fair to the man..he is trying to be a man and take care of the child..who says its only the womans choice in abortion.

Answer 9

He has a right to say what ever he wants. However it is not his body. The women is the one who will have to live with the decision the rest of her life. I am pro-life. I am not one of these crazy people out there trying to push my opinion on someone else. I believe life begins the conception. We humans should not have a choice to kill a Innocent little baby that had nothing to do with the way they were conceived. This is a very controversial subject. It will be interesting to see all the answers you receive

Answer 10

It saddens me to think a man would do that. Ultimately its the woman's decision. Shes the one having the baby. I believe if a man has unprotected sex he risks impregnating someone. If he can't be there for the mother, he should be there for the child in some capacity. I understand that in cases where there wasnt really a relationship(one night stand, casual sex etc)it might be hard, but every child has the right to know their parents.
I dont think a man should push a woman to abort a baby if the woman wants to have the child.