Darknes
Darkness all around me
can not even move
Darkness all around me
something that feels new
Very hard to cope with
very hard to see
Darkness All around me
Darkness All Around me
help oh help
oh plese
oh plese
Thats kinda off the top of my head tell me what you think along with the rating one through ten
Thanks in advance
2007-03-31 06:57:51 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Books & Authors
I Think that it is a good poem For a beginer perty good An 8 or 9
2007-03-31 15:10:47 · answer #1 · answered by Matthew B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
4
2007-03-31 14:08:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im going to say a 6 only because when you say it out loud it doesnt have a rythm. Try making the patterns work with each other good writing though
2007-03-31 14:06:08 · answer #3 · answered by Fiducia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a good start, but what are you trying to say with your imagery? Develop it a little more, get a feel for what you're saying, adopt a consistent flow (rhythm) and try again.
2007-03-31 14:08:44 · answer #4 · answered by jelesais2000 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would give it a 5. It is short and I do not understand it. Usually each line rhythms.
2007-03-31 14:05:16 · answer #5 · answered by sis74100 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG, i luve it!!!!!
10
10
10
10
10
10
10
10
10
10
10
10
10
so denifnatly 10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S. and dont listen to those ppl who give you lower than a ten they just dont have a good taste!
2007-03-31 19:43:10 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Hot•Babe♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not very good. i'd give that a 2 for effort. you really need to check your spelling, and this is coming off more like lyrics to a song.
2007-03-31 14:07:05 · answer #7 · answered by goodenoughforwhoitsfor 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Poet, very nice,and dark,don't be afraid.....10
2007-03-31 14:09:37 · answer #8 · answered by song1709! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I give it a 2. Honestly, it needs lots of work, and doesn't really make sense. Sorry! If you really try, I'm sure it'll be better.
2007-03-31 14:05:12 · answer #9 · answered by forestfaeye 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hmmm......
7
2007-03-31 14:04:20 · answer #10 · answered by HP7 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋