I dont even know where to begin, theres so much on my mind. im so hurt. i dont know what else to do. my hubby has done so many things in our marriage i dont know how much more to take.his lil ex girlfriend emailed me the other day claiming that my hubby has been trying to get at her. it hurts everyday. i dont know who to belive..i think in my eyes our marriage is pretty much over with.. i feel so emotionally detatched. i want to forgive him but i seem to cant anymore.. it stays on my mind more than anything and its buggin to the point where i want to hurt him back. i dont know what else to do. i have a 3wk old child and im staying with him to keep our baby happy. but its getting to the point where im lost in translation. im at an intersection in my life where i dont know where to turn anymore. a divorce costs too much, but im not even connecting anymore. whats wrong with me? whats going on in my marriage i cant seem to fix or why cant he be more honest with me? why does he hide 4rmme?
2007-03-30 18:29:38 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
she left her phone number too should i give her a call?i wanna see 4 real. i know he is lying so should i ask her?
2007-03-30 19:02:18 · update #1
You have a lot going on with you, go to speak with a counsellor to help you work through your issues. It may be a good idea also to get some marriage counselling. That may help you two work through your problems. Good luck!
2007-03-30 18:40:06 · answer #1 · answered by Mocha Chocolate 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry about how you are feeling. I have been there and I know that it hurts. My husband and I tried counseling and it didn't work. He was the type of person that thought he was always right. I found out he was cheating and we divorced. We have two kids together and it was not worth staying with him. My daughter says that she is glad we divorced. She said she loves us both, but we are happier with out separate lives. On the other hand.....
Children change a relationship. Your husband is no longer your #1 priority, but the precious baby is. He may find that he wants more attention and he can get it if he goes and gets some on the side. I would recommend trying to rekindle your love. Get a babysitter or have a family member watch your daughter and go out. If you do not want to go out, put in a movie and snuggle up on the couch.
Kids are our #1 priorities, but we need to remember that there are others in our lives that need our attention too.
Good luck and I hope you can get back to where you were. Divorce is the last option, but staying together just for the kids is not good either.
2007-03-31 01:40:14 · answer #2 · answered by mcgrawm7 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've just answered your own question. Do you want to take anymore of this abuse and make yourself miserable? Have some respect for yourself. How many times can you excuse your husband for this kind of behavior? Think of your child. Would you want him to watch you go through so much trauma. Remember, if you are unhappy, your child will be too. Don't you think your child is better off with a single happy mother then with miserable parents? Do yourself a favor and get rid of your husband. You will be much happier in the long run.
2007-03-31 01:42:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry that you're going through this very difficult time. You must be hurting so much that you can't think straight. Your daughter is too little to understand. You have to find the courage to stand tall and let your cheating, lying, no good husband know that you are not going to put up with him anymore. He doesn't really love you if he's talking to his ex when you just had his baby. He has no shame. You need to look out for YOU and your baby.
2007-03-31 01:57:59 · answer #4 · answered by mamabear 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If what your hubby's ex is saying is true then maybe do some investigating if you can afford it hire a private detective there is a website i don't know if you ever heard of it it's called www.cheaters.com take a look at it. Or spy on him if you have to which to some people is considered crazy and some will make you feel like you have no right to spy on him but hey love is blind you love your husband his ex is saying **** hell yeah your going to get very confused and you have EVERY right to find the truth find out what's going on especially since your more likely to get lies from him anyway. Cheaters aren't going to admit they played you for a fool. You have to find out if your being played here. Your the wife you deserve to know the truth and know where your marriage lies. If your man is infact cheating with his ex tell him to have her and you can do so much better!
2007-03-31 01:41:13 · answer #5 · answered by Momof1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to ask him to sit down for a talk. Tell him how you feel, not in an accusing way but say something like: When __ happens, I feel really hurt. The biggest mistake any woman can make it to stay with a no good man. Children are much better off with one good Mom who has some peace of mind than two parents who don't love and respect each other.
2007-03-31 01:37:39 · answer #6 · answered by Jan C 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Do you know this is true for sure? The ex girlfriend could be lying. It seems like the trust is gone, a key ingredient needed to make a marriage work is trust. Don't blame yourself for his mistakes......... I say hang in there, always try to make your marriage work but also know when enough is enough. Trust me as your child gets older it will affect the child in a negative way if your marriage doesn't get better.
Congratulations on your new baby! :^)
2007-03-31 02:31:00 · answer #7 · answered by Will 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your child will not be happy, the kid would be much better off with 2 seperate parents that love him/her and yet arent together as a couple in a house filled with pain and misery. i think you'relying to yourself tho. you arent staying for the kid you just dont know where to go, or how to leave. you need to wake up and be a mother the kid can look up to, put yourself first
2007-03-31 01:37:47 · answer #8 · answered by ana g 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Didn't you say you wanted to do something special for the aniversary? Now you say that your marriage is lost?
BTW a divorce only costs between $150 - 500 usd.
2007-03-31 01:34:03 · answer #9 · answered by Joe B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he wants to have his cake and eat it too. tell him how u feel and if nothing changes leave. You have to make yourself happy for the sake of your child
2007-03-31 01:40:40 · answer #10 · answered by KerryAnn 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋