I have issues dealing with trust.. I was betrayed once in high school by one who suppose to be a good friend who I stood up for and in return got nothing but a beating from a group of jockheads and him being part of it... he used me in order to be "popular".
Ever since then, I had trouble socializing and opening up to people which led me to sort of become emotionless... It wasn't until the end of the first year of college when I decided not let my insecurites get the best off me and go out and start trust in people again and really start living...
Its been 3 years and I think this problem has affected me again.. I saw in a computer a message of someone saying "i loved that kiss today in the morning" to my ex and lead me to believe thing that she was dating someone. The thing is.. me and her broke up because she decided she did not want to be in a relationship at the moment and I respected that and became friends.
2007-03-30 06:20:12 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
When I saw that message, I felt like that trust I had was broken and became utterly confused with doubts about her… The thing is.. during the time I met her.. she had interest in that friend of hers and tried dating him for 3 weeks but he kept screwing her over… that’s when we started becoming close… And knowing that she is with him now.. I felt like I was betrayed and used… that she left me for him while I believed her words…
During the week after.. I couldn’t help but view her differently and be strange around her.. I could of just let things go, but deep down inside me I couldn’t pull it off and act fake around her, since I do still treat her as a friend.
hen I told her about all this… She denies that she is seeing anyone right now and is mad at me for looking at her stuff and for accusing her of things that are not true… Now she feels like I am a jerk and won’t forgive me for what I did.
2007-03-30 06:21:10 · update #1
It is true that she did not mistreat me as a friend and all I did was give her the cold shoulder and mistreated her… but that was not intentional of me… while I was still dealing with the whole trust and insecurities issues playing on me…
The truth is.. I don’t mind if she is really dating someone else right now… As of now I just want to make things clear and I feel like If I don’t tell her the story of my past she wont understand why I was the way around her and the things I said…
What do you guys think I should do??
P.s. Sorry for all those who actually read the whole post, and thanks for doing so.
2007-03-30 06:21:53 · update #2
just apologize for looking at her stuff. don't try to make excuses.
then say "i'd like us to be friends again, i really hope u will learn to trust me again."
don't tell her about ur past unless she seeks it out.... she is ur ex girlfriend now. if she was ur girlfriend now i would advise u to explain...but u need to let her move on. and u have more important things to do: WORK ON YOUR SELF ESTEEM. u are a great person in that u can acknowledge ur weakness.. now take the next step and do something about it ok? u have to learn to trust yourself, and be a Strong, Good, Positive Man. that way, if u go out on a limb for someone else and they screw u over, it won't matter..cuz U were the one who had Good Intentions, and that person had Bad Intentions. dont' be afraid to put urself out there. just make sure u can move on and have ur own life that makes u happy, with or without the bad people out there. surround urself w/ positive, good, happy people, and u will slowly filter thru the negative, bad people..
good luck
2007-03-30 06:33:55 · answer #1 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to let the past go you can't change it. Use it to learn. Your ex is just that an ex. Start out as friends and if it goes beyond that great. Remember communication is important any relationship is doomed to failure
2007-03-30 13:40:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you tell her this story, and yes I read the whole thing while propping my eyes open, she is going to go into a coma.
2007-03-30 13:28:02 · answer #3 · answered by luckford2004 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell her the story in abbreviated form.
2007-03-30 13:35:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Confont the people you dont trust, and try to trust yourself..
2007-03-30 13:26:00 · answer #5 · answered by Parachutes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋