Should we keep the baby??? Abortion?

Question

My boyfriend and I have lived together for four years. I am about 4 weeks pregnant. I am in school right now with no job, and he works to barely support us. Next he will go to school and I will work to support us. We are very young and he is scared. He thinks he will be stuck in the job he has now forever, because there is no way I can support us, which is true, but I also don't beleive in abortion, and adoption is NOT an option. He thinks that abortion is a technology that we should take advantage of, because we can in no way support a child. I am early enough in the pregnancy that all I would have to do is take a pill, and it is all over.....but what comes after that could be regret and resentment, which I wouldn't want to snowball into hate, but you never know.
Please use an UNBIAS opinion when answering. If you are not pro-choice, then I don't think you have the answer i am looking for. This is a very big crisis for us, and I just want an outside, unbias opinion.

Answer 1

Why not ask your parents for support? A Friend?

Answer 2

Having a baby is a very big decision, as is an abortion. Seems like you pretty much know how you would feel if you went through with the abortion, and how it would be if you kept the baby. The best thing for you to do is get support from family and friends, not to help you make a decision, but to be there for you after you make one. Having a baby doesn't mean your life is over, it just means you and your boyfriend are going to work a little harder to make ends meet. You have to realize that if you do keep the baby, and you're not ready, emotionally or financially, that there are sacrifices that you are going to have to make. Look at your situation, evaluate your options, you don't have to have an abortion, you can put the child up for adoption. You have to evaluate your situation with your boyfriend and find the most logical answer for yourselves, because we don't know where you two are in life. Just make sure you have a good support system of friends and family close to you, and you should be all right.

Answer 3

This cannot be easy for you. Why is adoption not a option? I am very against abortion, but I can give you an unbias answer. Do you want a baby? You can always get on government assistance to help with the costs. Dont knock it, I was on it for 2 years and it is a life saver for people who need some help. From the way you talk it definatly sounds like you are not sure what you want. You need to really think if an abortion is what you want. Dont let other people tell you what to do. This is your choice. Abortion is not for me but for some it is the best thing to do. If you only want to abort because you cant afforde a baby, it is going to eat at you for a long time. My friend did the same thing and is in an instution now because she went crazy with guilt. If its a money issue, look into assistance. You are un-married, pregnant and basicly broke. They can help you. I would love to talk to you personally. Email me ! Dont worry, I am very understanding and non judgemental. Please Email me! I may be able to [e-mail]

Answer 4

Skipping all the safe sex lectures...as Im sure your aware already that protection is easier than the choices you have to face...
You dont say how old you actually are...if you are firm in your belief of no adoption or abortion then I think you already have the answer you are looking for, could you both move in with a relitive or friend till you are on your feet? or perhaps if your mum or an aunty is a kind understanding sort perhaps they can help you raise the baby untill you are financial enough to do it yourself?
I congratulate you on making the choice to stay in school and get an education, and although it will be hard it will benifit you and your partner in the long run...
I would sugguest if you do decide to make a go of it, you start collecting things from yard sales and second hand shops, you wont need a whole lot of baby furniture and hopefully this will save you alot of money...
Is there some sort of charity group that can help you out with things?
Things will be tight to start with as you set yourself up, but things will get easier as you get into the swing of things...
I hope some of this helps, it sounds to me like you have already decided what your going to do, and I wish you the very best of luck.

Answer 5

Well Honey, I've BEEN in your situation already. Do I regret it.? At first I did. I was very critical of myself and I wanted nothing to do with the man, I lived with him and owned a house together,. But you need to overcome it, forget it , and move on to survive your decision. What ever that may be. I feel for you, I know what you are going through. If you are in Pennsylvania you have a 24 - 48 hour waiting period after the abortion consultation. You need to way your options; short and long term and make your decision soon. Also, the pill you are speaking about may not always work, Google Abortion and do some research. Maybe this will help with your decision. Whatever you choose there is no right or wrong decision and ultimately it is YOUR decision. Feel free to contact me to discuss in private. Good Luck to you sweetie.

Answer 6

I do not think you should resort to an abortion! I got pregnant in highschool, for a long time boyfriend, whom I did not truely love. I did not handle it well. I was ashamed, afraid, in shock, and I thought it was the wors thing that could ever happen to me. Well, I've learned that what does not kill you only makes you stronger. I am a much stronger person, I have learned and grown tremendously from this. Initially, I panicked, and could not imagine my life with a child, I was only a child myself. Now, I CANNOT imagine my life without my child. She is amazing, and she makes life so worth while. She is my encouragment in everything that I do to better myself. She gives me a reason to strive to be a better person. Also, I know of someone who did chose abortion. She deeply regrets it, and it haunts her still. I think woman are made with a maternal instinct, and chosing to terminate your own pregnancy could lead to serious emotional and mental problems. I also know of someone who had an abortion when she was young and did not feel "ready" to raise a child. Later, when she was married, she desperatly wanted a child, but could no longer concieve. She realllly regretted the abortion. And if money is the biggest problem, there are government programs that can help. Welfare, medicaid, medicare, and WIC. If you are determined, there IS a way to financially support yourself and your child. Do not let your boyfriend talk you into a decision that may torment you for the rest of your life. I hope you make the right choice! Goodluck to you!

Answer 7

are you sure you'll be able to handle an abortion. I know people who have never been the same emotionally because of an abortion. This is a decision you will really have to make together because this decision could put a real strain on your relationship. Maybe someone in your family can help or you boyfriend could try to find a new job. Whatever you decide will be the best decision for you, but do decide now because if you have to go through a full blown abortion you may regret it. I would personally do anything to keep my baby, but thats just me.

Answer 8

If you don't believe in abortion and your having doubts on whether you want to do it or not you shouldn't do it. Because if you really wanted to get an abortion and just could care less you would of done it with out a problem. So i would suggest that you keep your child because thats what you really want although the time is not right and then you will regret taking a life away. Well i wish you the best in whatever choice you choose to make. Next time make sure you use protection or get on birth control so you won't have this difficult dicision to make.

Answer 9

I don't think you should have an abortion. Babies are wonderful gifts and often come at the most unexpected time and when we really are not planning, but many of the greatest gifts in life are surprises! If you are willing to be parents you will make it work things may be hard and you may struggle for awhile but nobody said parenting was easy. There are a lot of places that support young families and those that are students. There are programs to help with food, health care, daycare, etc. If you want the child don't say we cannot do it because where there is a will there is a way. You might just have to give up a few things for awhile. I really think you can make it work............if you are willing!!!

Answer 10

You're going to get a lot of hatred for this question, although you asked for the pro-lifers to go elsewhere.

Personally, NO, I am not for abortion. I couldn't do it.

Some women can do it with no regrets. Others will live with that choice for the rest of their lives. Yes, to be realistic, if you're one of the latter category, that choice may very well snowball into hate later. You may want to consider how that's going to turn out.

If abortion is something that you don't believe in, and adoption is not an option, the only other option is to raise a baby. It's not a bad thing, although it can be shocking when you're not expecting it.

I did it. I had to struggle for the first three years, but I did it. What's worse? I did it alone, so, I know that it can be done.

Some people don't want to go through that, and I can certainly sympathize. It was definitely no cake walk.

The choice is yours, hon, but consider how long it's going to take for you to get on your feet with the baby. If that's something that you're willing to work through, have that baby. If it's something that you're not ready for, don't.

I wish I had a written-in-stone solution for you, hon.

Answer 11

Oh honey don't have an abortion. I know to many women who have had them and carry the emotional scars. It is a difficult thing to go through.
Why is abortion but not adoption an option? Maybe God placed this baby inside of you so that you can give him/her to a wonderful couple that can't have any children. What an amazing gift that would be! I think before you say no to adoption you really should educate yourself on it. It may not be what you think. You can still maintain contact with the child. All life is precious, don't murder your unborn child please.
Also if you think you would like to parent the child there are many government programs to help you out. Food stamps and WIC to start off with. If you all are in college or even if it is just you then maybe you all could live in married housing on campus. You don't necessarily have to be married to live in married housing.
Good luck to you and God Bless!