should they let her pass on or let her suffer?

Question

my mother in law is 80 yrs old, shes had 5 heart attacks in the past year,i know its hard but i think they should let her go, because the poor woman is suffering so bad,and she cant take much more,her kids wants to keep her around , which is very understandable, but shes in more pain each and every day, she died monday night but the doctor brought her back,so my question is would you let her go on to heaven or lay down here and suffer with pain each and every day.

TO ANSWER THE PERSON THAT SAID WHAT WOULD I DO, LET MY MOM LIVE OR KILL HER, FOR ONE I DONT SEE IT AS KILLING,AND YES IF MY MOM HAS WENT THRU THE VTHINGS THIS POOR WOMAN HAS GONE THRU THEN YES I WOULD DECIDE TO LET HER PASS ON AS HARD AS IT WOULD BE BUT I LOVE MY MOM VERY MUCH, AND THATS WHY I WOULD CHOOSE TO DO THAT BECAUSE I WOULDNT WANT TO SEE HER SUFFERING ANYMORE THAN SHE ALREADY HAD,MY MOTHER IN LAW CANT HALF SEE, CANT HALF HEAR, SHE CANT READ , OR WRITE, AND SHES NOT ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF HERSELF, I LOVE HER AND I HATE SEEING HER SUFFER. WOULD YOU RATHER SEE YOU MOM SUFFERING OR WOULD YOU RATHER FOR GOD TO BRING HER HOME?

she passed away march 29th, her poor soul couldnt go any longer.

Answer 1

I WOULD LET HER DIE. MY HUSBANDS GRANDMOTHER WENT THOUGH THE SAME THING. FINELLY SHE JUST LEFT. WHEN IT IS HER TIME TO GO GOD WILL NOT LET THEM BRING HER BACK.

Answer 2

14 mths ago, We the family had to make the choice 'when her heart stops do we want the dr to bring her back' 1st you have to realize the person u LOVE is suffering, no1 wants her to die.
But her bones were brittle after 29 chemo treatments,her veins were blowing out and once the med., is given they have to shock the patient to make the heart pump & the med to flow through her body,compressions on her chest would more then likely break her bones. IT is more then a HARD choice to make...but make that decision w/ LOVE.
And TRUST IN THE RESURRECTION, you will see your loved 1 again.
my mom-in-law has 5 children,14 grd; 7 grt-grd, we all want her to still be here w/ us and she fought a good HARD fight and lost. We remember her everyday with LOVE.
Not 1 of us regrets signing the D.N.R.
She awaits a Glorious resurrection

Answer 3

They need to give her back her dignity. What they were doing was only prolongly the ineveitable. I work in the ICU and i see this all the time and it is very selfish of them. they were only thinking of what they wanted and not was best for your mother in law. What should have happened was if your mother in law was able to, she should have been asked what she wanted in the event of cardiac arrest. It should have been her choice, but maybe she was incapable of making that decision. I would have let her die in peace and with her dignity and not let her suffer. I would make her comfortable and let nature take its course. Im sorry for your familys loss and what u have gone through.

Answer 4

I think I would let her go so she isn't in pain anymore. Lets face it, as cold as it may seem, she isn't going to get any better and if they continue to let her "suffer" they are helping her to die a slow and miserable death! If she is conscious they should help her to remember the good things she experienced in life and when she feels at ease with her life she will decide to go on her own. If she is not conscious then she may as well be gone already and they are only keeping her alive for themselves, very selfish I think. There is a good lesson to learn in this, it is to tell your family your wishes when it comes to situations like this. If they know your wishes it is much easier to make the decision to let go.

Answer 5

At 80, she's lived a good life and even if she recovers from this, she will never be the same woman you knew nor will she ever be in perfect health. Let her go so she won't have to suffer anymore.

Answer 6

I'm sorry for your loss. It's nice to see a son in law who obviously loves his wife's mother. When my grandpa was dying, we thought it was best to keep him as comfortable as possible, but let him go. The whole family was with him when he passed. I was crying during the last few minutes of his life, but felt a great peace when he passed as I knew he was no longer suffering. Family of the dying often want them to live for selfish reasons and the dying will hang on in a coma knowing this. It's odd that when the family tells them that it is ok to go and that they (the family) will be ok, the patient simply goes. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family and may she rest in peace.

Answer 7

I read your update and the loss. God has taken her and ended the suffering. Sometimes, He doesn't do things the way we want or with speed, but your mother n law knew she was loved. You can find comfort in that.

Answer 8

Turn the question around, and see how you would answer this: "Would you let your own mother live, or would you kill her?" If you were standing there alone with your mother and a doctor, and your mother had a heart attack, and the doctor said, "I can save her, what do you want me to do?" could you say, "Let her die"? Show some empathy; this is a very tough situation for your in-laws.

Answer 9

My mom is 93 years old. and if she lands in the hospital and dies she has order that she does not want to be brought back to life. As much as I want her not to leave I would let her go because I love her and I don't want her to suffer. any more than she has.

Answer 10

It is sorry that we do not have mercy death in India. The doctors are also bent upon to perform their duties honestly and diligently. They also know that one should die instead of sufferings. Old age itself is a disease. I wish they could let her pass away but they are professionally and legally bound to not to do it.

It is the God and only God who can help her.

Answer 11

I think that should be your mom in laws decision. She may be 80 but if she has said to do everything possible to save her then that is her dicision. Being she is your mom in law I would say you should stay out of it. Let her and her children decide what is best.