Because of my low self esteem i don't have confidence. I don't want to "just be myself" because i don't LIKE myself. I hate that i'm lazy, anti-social, quiet, introverted, socially un-equipped, amongst other things.....I wish i was outgoing and confident, but i've tried pretending to be outgoing and confident, and afterwards i felt fake and not myself....What should i do? Your answers are appreciated.
2007-03-28 18:13:41 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
As I told someone else, get some therapy. A good therapist will find out why you feel this way & help to to deal with it.
2007-03-28 18:22:34 · answer #1 · answered by shermynewstart 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The most wonderful person in the world is the one looking at the mirror. You can be quiet, and not lack self esteem. You can be introvert and still be outgoing. Why must we follow others people guidelines. When you noticed that you were not yourself, that really is an in depth look about you. This allows for inner self evaluation. With those things you mentioned it really leads me to believe, that you do like yourself, you might not like what you have become, but you are really something special. If you look around you see others worse than you think you are. You are one in a million. Be yourself do not follow others pattern of society. Vive la confidance.
2007-03-29 02:01:43 · answer #2 · answered by eseven57 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone has some degree of laziness but if you think you're too lazy, you change that by getting up and doing something. You don't have to change who you are.
You don't have to be outgoing to be confident. We often expect more of ourselves than others expect of us and focus more on our own inadequacies than anything.
So you are more independent than most people. That's not a bad thing. People who are extroverted are usually more insecure than you know.
Takes your negative qualities and find the positive in them or tweak them slightly to make them positive.
2007-03-29 03:13:11 · answer #3 · answered by minuteblue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all I just don't understand why you don't like yourself. how old are you? If your a teen ager tha you prbably haven't blossomed yet. and I don't meen in a perverted way but as a person. Ok first thing you need to do is accept who you are, you are not going to have self confidence, or selfesteem if you don't accept yourself as a person. Ask yourself why are you anti-socail. is it because you just don't know anybody? I find that if you join a group function you would comepout of your shell. Anti-socail is iether because you are afraid of people or you just don't like people and would not care about
being anti-socail. Joining the gruop can help equip you socailly. secon ask yourself what if anything you would change about yourself. list them, you know are you skiny are you fat, are you fair and just really never learned how to put on make-up? what ever it is only you need to see it. write it in a jurnal on the first page of the jurnal write exactly what you wrote up top here. as a reminder that you want to change. Outgoingness is sometimes over rated. I mean just this by that statement. you do not have to be in playboy magazine to be outgoing. or even streak your neiborhood. I find that when i dont have a reason to talk to people I can't talk about anything. but if somebody ask me questions i can talk forever. If i come to you house to fix your A/C i can talk to you about it. But if I saw you in the super market and thought hey that girl is hot i would not ever be able to say anything. But at the same time if I was called out to work on you home A/C I could Ask you all sorts of personal questions. And we might even become friends. I hate big crouds anymore than 10 or 12 people in a room and I'm as quite as a mouse. but put me in a room with a hand full of people and i can sing and dance and talk all night. I'm not against drinking but I can't stand to be around drunk people. but I can go to a karaoki bar and make a fool out of myself i love to sing and I have never had stage fright if I am there for a reason. I played in the band and was in drama and in the NJROTC program in high school I can perform but talking to one person i just met for no reason is just simply out of the question. What I mean to tell you long winded as it may seem is. love youself for who you are and people will love you for who you are too. Life is only as good as you make it. If you knew you were going to die today at the stroke of midnight what would you do? How open and out going would you be. Who would miss you? How many lives did you touch by just being you? hen you are gone what would people miss most about you? So live life with you heart not your fears. May god bless you and may you see the light of who you are and how special you are to somebody.
2007-03-29 01:59:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
do something you like that involves other people, like i do sports and i was in orchestra, and you meet people who become pretty cool friends-that solves the anti-social thing. and i am really lazy but my friends always make me do things and they are a big help, but really i like to stay home and watch movies or go to sleep. thing is, when im alone, i am quiet because i dont talk to myself-aloud- but with my intruding friends and my sex drive, i have to be loud in order to get their attention. i think im ugly, i just dont show it and i dont care, so it doesnt matter anymore
basically, my friends keep me in the loop, without "the guys", i wouldnt know whats goin on every morning
2007-03-29 01:24:10 · answer #5 · answered by ceesteris 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋