For those over Forty: If you had your youth to live over again what would you do that you didn't do, knowing

Question

what you know now? And how old are you now?

Answer 1

I would have traveled in my twenties and lived in Italy

Answer 2

Here's the easy part: I'm 63.

I would have done a great many things differently -- hell, I was twice divorced; I envy those people who say they have no regrets (except maybe Edith Piaf, who didn't really mean "non, je ne regrette rien").

I should have been more open to communication, and I should have been more assertive, especially in attacking ideas with which I strongly disagreed (I worked as a diplomat, and might have had a greater impact on policy if I had been willing to buck trends openly; but so much of policy depends upon who's in office, and what absurd ideology they obey, and I never thought I could fight it).

Perhaps I should have stayed with the railroad. It was cold out there on winter nights, and I would return to the caboose with a mustache of ice, and it didn't carry the prestige of my later jobs. But it was a living, and I never had to say anything I didn't mean.

But I'm thinking, does anyone really have a choice? As my first wife put it, "I married a brakeman, not a diplomat". But could I really put myself through school and then never use the degrees for anything?

Perhaps I might have chosen richer parents, might have chosen not to indoctrinate myself in a given religion, might not have enlisted in the Navy, and a whole lot of other things.

I know you may be looking for guidance, but so much depends on who and where you were born. If I had been a Pakistani farmer I might still be out there plowing fields and been happy about it, with my seventeen grandchildren.

As things turned out, I do have one grandchild, who I hope will do better things than I did, but his world will be very different from mine.

Answer 3

When I was in sixth grade, a classmate ran away and was never heard from again. In the note she left she said I was her best friend. I hardly even knew who she was. She must have been extremely lonely. I would have reached out to her and tried to be the friend she needed. I thought about undoing all the abuse I was put through by some very sick people, but helped shape the kind of person I am today and I would not like to change who I am although if I had to go through all that again I think I would run away with my classmate. I am 49.

Answer 4

I'd rebel against Uncle Wally, my father's mad brother who bullied and abused me when I was ages 9-13.