I have known my best friend for 8 yrs. I love her like a sister but for the past 4 yrs she has accused me of doing wrong to her over &over again when I haven't. I have been the best friend to her &have given her every reason to count on me &trust me to always be there for her. Our senior year was a breaking point in our friendship when she ignored me for 4 months w/out telling me why. She finally said she did it bc she depended on me 2 much. I didnt understand and took me awhile 2 forgive but I did. Ever since then I have given her so many chances at being a better friend 2 me. I always tell her how she makes me feel &It is always me fixing the friendship, never her. I feel I care for the friendship way more than she does. I have tried to end it once before but I missed her 2 much. I gave her another chance, and she has failed me again at being my best friend. She has always walked over me &I am torn, I want her in my life bc I care but I don't want to hurt anymore. Any Suggestions?
2007-03-28 16:53:28 · 14 answers · asked by Addicted 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
In all honesty I think she maybe hinting that she don't want to be best friends any longer. She may just be wanting to get some time away from the old days, or just wanting to reinvent herself! I think that there is more to this situation, but regardless of the missing details I think you should give her space, and if she wants to fix the relationship fine, but don't let it consume you. I think that saying of if you love something/ someone than let it go, and if it returns than something about the love / bond gets stronger, and if it don't come back it just wasn't meant to last. You've stated your feelings, and you have to be open to receive her feelings.... the lack of response should tell you she doesn't want to pursue a best friend relationship with you. You need to forgive her of any pain she caused where you can be set free from the situation, and get some peace. You'll make new friends trust me!!
I hope this was helpful, God bless!
2007-03-28 17:10:15 · answer #1 · answered by mynameismebutidontknowdidit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take some time off. Your comments make it sound like a bad relationship. You might just be comfortable with her around since you have known her for so long. But best friends shouldnt feel this way all the time. You dont have to straight out tell her you dont wanna talk to her anymore. Just less phone calls and conversations. I had a friend in highschool who I thought was my best friend. We had some differences and stopped talking. Eventually she came around and she was the only one visiting when I moved away, and talked to me almost on a daily basis. I guess those times in our lives were just very different. Now she is still my best friend and I am her baby's Goddmother :) I think we have known eachother ofr like 9 years now.
2007-03-28 17:01:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
they say that no one can make you feel bad or inferior unless you allow them to. if she has been hurting you for the past few years constantly i don't see why you are still holding on. as i see it she doesn't want to have anything to do with you, so just give up on her. she's not worth compromising your self respect or dignity for if she's treating you like a doormat. she's not worth your friendship,yaar. so go out there find someone who really need you but not before unloadiing all the baggage off your back.just go tell your dear 'friend' that you've had enough of being treated like a used towel and that she's on her own now.
2007-03-28 17:09:36 · answer #3 · answered by rara avis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anonymous--It sounds to me like it is time for you to move on and find a new best friend. This happens, she never put the effort into the friendship that you did. What - does it take a house to fall on your head? 4 months without talking to you in your senior year - she doesn't care about you and she is not your friend. Find a new one. good luck -k-
2007-03-28 16:59:30 · answer #4 · answered by kbama 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is not your true friend. I had a so called friend like that and to this day it bothers me the things I put up with from her and regret having let her. I felt the same way you did. She's not worth it, you need a friend that will treat you the way you do. Do yourself a favor and forget about her, you are kidding yourself because she isn't being a good friend, no matter how much you want her to. And she doesn't respect you because you let her treat you that way.
2007-03-28 17:00:46 · answer #5 · answered by strawberry 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You say she has always walked over you, so that means she never really respected you. Why would you want her in your life???? You don't need that stress in your life. What you need to do is just stop all contact with her and don't bother giving her any kind of excuse, but this time you make it for good not four months like she did.
2007-03-28 17:06:30 · answer #6 · answered by mia w 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find other friends...don't completely stop talking to her just find other people to be in you life that are positive. Friends aren't supposed to bring you down they there to lift you up. Once you have a larger circle of friend missing her won't be much of a problem. She has some problems that she needs to work out on her own and if she doesn't see that then u need to move on.
2007-03-28 16:59:34 · answer #7 · answered by sss_1122 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she doesn't deserve your friendship. i've gone through the same situation. i was always estimated by her. finally we had to tear apart. believe me i am uch relieved. u have te whole world at ur feet. just keep ur mind busy with other things... and soon u'll forget her. if u still want to continue ur friendship i'm sure she'll itch u again. let her know ur importance... let her feel how special u r!!! let her feel that there is no one like u... trust me i think u'll find much much better frends out there!!!! all the best
2007-03-28 17:04:23 · answer #8 · answered by viji_33_33 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take it from me only surround yourself with positive people that make you feel good!!!!
Your friend is probably changing, and in the wrong way. Maybe one day she will see the error of her ways, if not its her problem and she misses out on a great friend.
Trust me drop the b****!
2007-03-28 16:59:14 · answer #9 · answered by J<3R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, you are confusing friendship with dependence. A friend doesn't do that to you, and that is not your friend. The problem is you feel if you leave her alone, you will BE ALONE.
Your "friend" sees this and sees your low self-esteem and uses it to her advantage. That's why she abuses you. She also left you alone to show that you need her more than she needs you.
As difficult as it is going to be, you need to leave her alone. Afterwards, you will need to work on your self-esteem. You don't need someone to continue doing you like this...
2007-03-28 17:11:36 · answer #10 · answered by linus_van_pelt_4968 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋