Girlfriend of 4 YEARS PROBLEMS?

Question

Me and her fell into a rut.these past 2 months.i wanted my break..she didnt wanna give to me..so i took it myself.
But.we've seen each other everyday for 4 years since we were 16 and never got tired of each other..i just wanted time to get my life together..but she didnt give it to me..so i took it..by still seeing her everyday..but just 1 hour a day..and it use to hurt her and she use to cry.BUT I DIDNT KNOW.
i havent really had a job..and she got tired of it..so recently..she wanted to take a break until i got a job.i got a job and that turned into.i wanna be single and i wanna be independant..i've always had someone there i wanna do things on my own.BUT I STILL WANT U IN MY LIFE
i kinda pushed things..always questioning our relationship.always saying WELL ARE WE TOGETHER OR NOT.and it pushed her away.now i got a job..and she still feels like she wants to be on her own..but i dont think she cares if im in her life or not..but even tho i took my own break.i was always there for her

now that i wanna be with her..she wants her break..but its killing me..its like she never knew me and can walk away from 4 years so easily..i think she has some influence in her thoughts..but is their anyway i can get her back?? I've showed her that i've changed..i dont care about a 50/50 relationship right now..i just want her in my life..then we can work on the 50/50..but i dont want her to go out..meet guys..have sex with them then try to work things out..that will never work..it'll be like shes tainted..:( man..i dunno..HOW CAN I GET HER BACK..SHE HASNT EVEN SHOWED EMOTION THRU ANY OF THIS..and she is a very emotional/sensitive girl..

she was the one saying we'll be together forever..etc..

AND I WAS ALWAYS WITH HER..SHE DIDNT KNOW WE WERE ON A BREAK..instead of seeing her right when she got out of work @ 5pm..i would go to her house @ 9pm and kick it for 1 hour..

but i still spent the weekend at her house..

that was my way of taking a break..but i never wanted to be apart from her..

i admit..i wasnt the best boyfriend...but this has really opened my eyes..and I just wish i get a second chance

Answer 1

You're only 20 years old, right? People change as they grow up. Sounds like your gf just either changes or got fed up or both. I think just let it go, and she may come back to you. If you try to get her back by going to her house, etc, it will scare her off more. Leave her alone, and if she wants to come back, she will on her own. Just do your own things. Maybe start dating someone else. Do something that interests you to get your mind off her. Concentrate on school (if you are in college). Get a good job. Show her you're a responsible person she can respect.

Answer 2

Let's see you met at 16 have have never dated anyone else for any length of time? Don't you think you both deserve an opportunity to see what the world is all about? There are so many wonderful people out there and you want to limit yourself and your girl to just knowing each other? You may be in pain right now, but you are very young. It will pass. Take this time to grow as a person, develop your own interests, make new friends. Use this time to make yourself happy. Remember, we all tend to want what we don't have. This is not the closing of a door, but the opening of a new one. You can't make some one want to be with you. So just move forward and you will find someone who will appreciate and love you. Who knows, in time you may look back and wonder what were you so upset about.

Answer 3

So you're break didn't last very long, like 2 months? When someone breaks up with you and it hurts a lot you find a way to cope with it. Maybe now you can understand how she felt. When she wanted to be with you, you wanted your break. Maybe now it's time for hers. When you said you wanted your break, you should have considered the fact that she wasn't going to sit and wait around forever for you to decide to be with her, since for her, she didn't see it as an option, she wanted to be with you. It's a big risk you took, and now the consequences. I would say be persistent, until she says it's over permanently. As you said you were always in the in between with her, never really being together or what not. It sucks to feel like you're hanging in the air, and not land in sight, you weren't forward and stable with your feelings and now that you've changed your mind, it's a different story. Who;s to say that if she agrees to get back together, you're not going to pull the same thing on her again. Make a choice and stick with it.

Answer 4

Ahhhh, Lord this is one of those "be careful what you wish for", you wanted the break and took it, regardless of how she felt about it. You admit that you have not been the best boyfriend and "haven't really had a job". Of course she got tired of that. When you wanted your break, you FINALLY got a job, independence and to be single. She gave you all of that and decided you are not worth the trouble any longer.

You now must suffer the consequences of the single independence you enjoyed.

Answer 5

Well it sounds to me like your girl finally decided to give you your space that you wanted so badly! Take it and move on because she may not be ready to get back with someone that couldnt make it through the tough times. Or maybe shes just getting you back for what you put her through. Only time will tell. Sorry I couldnt be more help.

Answer 6

Thats cool you got your **** together but,c'mon leave the girl alone.
She wants to do her player thing or whore thing
go have some drinks of beer and
go to strip club you'll feel like new man,
****, a women can be a player :"whatever:" she is playing ur *** like a violin.
GOOD pay back is a ***** and I hope you realize that in the end,

Answer 7

So you wanted to have a break and to be single ,date other girls and everything but now because is she that want a break you don't want to.How does it feel.I'm glad that this happens now you can feel how she felted when you wanted to walk away.

Answer 8

HI,
LOOK JUST BE UP FRONT WITH THEM AND TELL THEM HOW IT IS AND ARSK THEM IF THEY WANT TO SEE OTHERS AND SEE WHERE THAT GOES AND TRY NOT TO BE PUSHY AS YOU WILL TURN THEM AWAY NO ONE LIKES PRESSURE AND IF YOU DO PUT PRESSURE ON THEM THEY WILL CERTAINLY GO ELSE WHERE HOPE THIS HELPED AND MAYBE TRY DOING THE THING WHERE YOU DONT SEEM INTRESTED TOO MUCH ON THEM AND SEE IF THEY START CHASSING YOU HOPE ALL GOES WELL

Answer 9

YOUR NAME IS LORD?
well LORD...you need to spend some time in the desert....like 40 days or so.
Stop trying to make something happen....it will or it won't.
Ever thought of becoming a comedian?
With the name LORD you could reach high levels.

Answer 10

Accept her break now. The time apart will do you both good.