that way they'd make themselves some money. After we'd packed up our stuff and made agreements and cancelled our previous rental agreement and moved across the USA to come back to home town. Then the stipulation that we did everything according to how they wanted things done. They don't like my husband at all for previous events from the past and they never really gave him a chance in the first place. Now they want to kick him out and have me stay in the house, then I can buy it if I want in fact I can then have the house as long as I divorce my husband. I decided that wasn't at all fair and told them I felt it was a bit of control and it would be best for both sides if we moved completely out of the house. Am I wrong and ungrateful in this decision?
2007-03-28 14:17:28 · 14 answers · asked by KayAlley 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This cat and mouse of game has been going on for a year and every thing they say they'll do they don't do. They throw a fit if we don't let them know everything about our lives as well.
2007-03-28 14:41:02 · update #1
It was true manipulation. It's these types of things that make people take up the rule to never do business with friends or family.
Your parents can not kick your husband or you out if you can demonstrate that money was paid to them in any form or fashion. As a landlord they can evict you but it is a long process depending on the state you live in. You need to take a deep breath and look to see what your rights are as a tenant in your state. This will give you a time line for getting out of your parent's intended trap.
You and your husband are probably one paycheck away from the poor house after the big move. After looking at your rights as a tenant, that is if you can show money being paid to your parents for any part of getting into this house, take a hard look at your finances. Check out http://www.getrichslowly.org/ to look up some suggestions for getting a handle on your money.
Then make a plan. Do a true brainstorming session with your husband. Don't leave any option unturned and don't judge any thoughts you come up with. You judge ideas later. But by doing this you'll realize that you do have choices still open to you and the world hasn't come to an end like it feels it has.
It's obvious that you'll be moving out of the parent's trap soon. I'd suggest selling as much as you can to reduce your moving costs even if you're going to be staying in your parent's town.
Another bit of advice is don't think about suing your parents. It might sound nice late at night to talk about it but it's a waste of money, and it will tangle you up in a prolonged fight with your parents for years to come. Forgo litigation and there's a chance that some sort of relationship might develop again between you and your parents.
2007-03-28 14:58:51 · answer #1 · answered by pensacola_sand 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ABSOLUTELY NOT. What the heck is this the dark ages?
You stick to your guns, darlin!!! Get out of that house asap.
That's so disrespectful. I am just livid over this for you.
You are MARRIED, if that's what they call respect...oh, no not on my watch...
Yeah, after your gone; let them become landlords, keep up the repairs, the yard, the contracts...I'm so loving what they are in for...lol And the good news, they're going to deserve it.
I'm kidding, I don't want to sound mean to your parent's but they have no business doing this to you and your mate.
They had the chance to voice their opinions BEFORE you got married to him and now they should keep their mouth shut. It's hard on you and your martial relationship to bear what they think of your husband. When you are around them don't let them bring up the past. Tell them only good things about your husband from now on. Just tell them, "hey, everybody has to grow" and your happiness is ALL that should matter to them anyway.
Your parent's owe you respect for your decision.
When you think about it, they also owe you some serious money for this move.. You have some negoiating power here but it might take having to get a lawyer involved and when it's family it's all that more difficult. They should honor the original agreement and allow you to do a "rent to own" contract.
Or a "no down payment" purchase of the home. See if you can get this back on track, but if not, GET OUT !!!
2007-03-28 14:41:05 · answer #2 · answered by Pinkprincess5455 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No. Sounds like your parents are trying to control your life and as an "adult," stand your ground. If you are to pay "them" rent what's the difference of paying it somewhere's else? There is no GUARANTEE your parents will live up to their end of the bargain if they have let you down already after all the efforts you made to move back. You are neither wrong, nor ungrateful. Your parents are the ones who should apologize for leading you on like they did.........
2007-03-28 14:29:59 · answer #3 · answered by Theban 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are an adult and now that you have given up your apartment and was going to leave the area anyway. I would move my family far away from them so they can no longer control you and make your husband feel less then a man.
2007-03-28 14:59:08 · answer #4 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
are you serious?? he is your husband before God, He always comes first, i would move out and live in a tent with my husband if we had to, your parents are horrible and much too controlling-they have no respect for your decisions. Also, you choose your home, they don't!
2007-03-28 14:28:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
no they are not fair in holding a house over your head in order to get you to leave your husband that would be like saying in order to see your future grandchildren you have to love him to death and give us the house (not a suggestion just a example by the way) so moving out would be the best way to go and from this point share with them how much they hurt you and that you feel no responsibility in walking away from the house you did not know it came with such huge strings attached or you never would have agreed to it!
2007-03-28 14:26:51 · answer #6 · answered by peterpansdate 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Run...and make them contact you. when they understand what they have done ( and they may never) they will back off. Or you will see things their way as your opinion of your dear husband may change and decide to be a baby with your parents again.....your call...but I think your on the right track now. "And they will leave their parents and cleave to one another"....not the parents....stick by your man so he can stick by you.
2007-03-28 14:35:11 · answer #7 · answered by Cadman1965 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think its time to cut ties with your family till they come to their senses. Im sure they are not perfect and they cant expect your husband to be. He is the man you chose to marry and you have made things work this far. RUN RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN. They will come a callin.... When they get their minds right.
2007-03-28 14:58:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
GET OUT OF THE HOUSE, QUICKLY!!!!
Don't live under their thumbs!! You are now an adult, do what you want.
2007-03-28 14:37:07 · answer #9 · answered by ♪♪♫ DINO ♪♫♪ 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
So get a quick divorce get the house remarry the old man and stick you tong out at your parents.What they going to do ?
2007-03-28 14:35:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋