First time for both of us. (me 22 and her 20) She's a petite shy Filipina and I'm a tall, gentle, white guy.
Music, beds, methods. I need every bit of advice possible. I want to see to it she likes it and wants more :P
2007-03-28 13:27:13 · 12 answers · asked by Jim_atthedrive-in 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm guessing candles, the Cure, and lots of gentle loving exploration.
2007-03-28 13:40:54 · update #1
Congratulations on making it to this mile stone. Each of you has contributed to giving each other a precious gift.
May the Lord bless you both, inspite of what anyone else will say about this "in these times" don't listen to it.. ok
The first advice I would give you both; don't over do any alcolhol at the wedding reception. When you "melt" into each other on your wedding night; you want to remember it.
A first time for a woman can be painful, there may be a little blood as well. Don't let this frighten you it's completely normal. Are you going to use protection, a condom or has she been on the pill for a least 2 mos.? If not then you need to discuss this with her to make sure you realize that you can get pregnant on your honeymoon... if you go in there bare.lol
Setting the mood? That's not probably going to be a big problem. Subdued lighting would be nice especially candle light, a soft low music, you don't want to not hear each other talk to each other. That's the most exciting thing about this.
Communicating!!! You will both learn what you like, where to touch and this takes WORDS..it will all come together. Patience is a big virture in this area. Go slow, don't hurry anything about this night. You can "check" her for readiness while you are kissing...gently reach down and use your hand in her vaginal area, if she's moist...she's doing great.
When you mount (missionary style is probably best if she's truly shy) allow your penis to just press her vagina, do this a little at a time not all at once. If you reach her hymen just allow the penis to "sit" where it stops for now. This will allow her vagina to stretch and accomodate whatever size you are. After you've done that for a minute allow yourself to back out a little and then go back, slow and gentle. This is going to take the greatest control you've ever done anything with. Not to add to any pressure for you...Just remember this first time needs to be special for both of you.
This is no time to "act" like a bunny; it will not be pleasant.
The worst that can happen is pre-mature ejaculation and don't worry about that either. You can hold and stroke each other and you'll be "up" and ready for more in about 15 to 20 minutes...And if that happens...it's the same procedure as described above...Good man, you'll be a great husband and lover.
In the beginning it's advisable for her to not "do it" 4 -5 times in one day. Don't make sex the most important thing about the honeymoon. You're going to be going places and doing things together etc...Now for why I say this...There is a condition that can happen to young brides from sexual activity...it's called honeymoon cystis. It comes about from the frequent "friction" in this area. This can cause a infection in the uretha of the young woman and make urination very painful. So just go slow, your going to have a life time of "bedroom romping" After a couple of weeks her body will have adjusted to this new activity. ONE more thing as you learn to communicate each others needs. Let her know you are completely comfortable about letting her take the lead sometimes. That can be fun for you too. smile lol
Well I hope this is the kind of information you are looking for and I hope it has been educational, enlighting, etc...
2007-03-28 14:10:45 · answer #1 · answered by Pinkprincess5455 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is so sweet that it will be both of your first time. What you need to do is take it slow and explore each others bodies to find out what you like and what you don't like. Put on some nice slow romantic music maybe light some candles. Don't push her to do anything she is not ready for. Make sure you have some sort of lubrication just in case she is nervous and gets dry down town. Don't stress about it. It is natural and you love each other. It will be beautiful no matter what. But don't expect perfection. Sex is a learned activity that gets better over time. Loving and respecting each other is what is important. Good luck and have fun!!
2007-03-28 13:36:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are a sweetheart.
I agree that everything will just fall into place, dont worry too much or the mood will just fall bland.
The first time should always be concentrated on the emotional part, and should be shown through actions and PATIENCE. Take everything slow, and just look at her, and ask something like "Why didnt I marry you sooner? You are amazing."
She will always want more even if it doesnt work out as perfectly as you'd like.
Congrats, really. You have my respect and admiration for saving yourself.
Enjoy, sweetheart. Prayers and happiness to you.
2007-03-28 13:36:24 · answer #3 · answered by love anyway 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
be respectful.be patient. take your time and let her take the time she needs as well. you are both getting to know each other in a new way. it takes a while. explore one another,talk. this is real life. not a movie. so don't be surprised if she doesn't want seconds. you can set the stage if you want but, if she's scared or nervous, she may feel a little forced to "perform". have a wonderful evening.congratulations on your marraige.
2007-03-28 13:50:44 · answer #4 · answered by racer 51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go easy and slow. Talk and make sure both of your are comfortable. First time can be tricky :-)
Take time and explore! That's the best way to enjoy your first time. She is likely to be very shy and also scared. Don't be surprised if she is shocked!! That's very common too!
Keep the lights dim to start with, if you like. But make sure they are bright once you both get going!!
Tell me how it goes ;)
2007-03-28 13:33:51 · answer #5 · answered by krsh28 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the sweetest thing I have seen all day. Bravo to you both. With an attitude like that, I'm certain it doesn't matter what you do, she'll love it no matter what.
On our honeymoon our place had a hot tub, and we took lots of bubble baths by candle light - some of my most fond memories.
....congrats and enjoy.
2007-03-28 13:32:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anna 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make sure you shower and be sure to use a deodorant.
Everything else will fall into place as you take it slow and easy
the first time. you have the rest of your lives for the hot and heavy, most of all be gentle.
2007-03-28 13:52:18 · answer #7 · answered by old man 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, the vast majority of people do NOT have sex on their wedding night. After everything that goes on during the wedding day... it's a very long day and exhausting, you'll be lucky if you make it out of your tux and dress before you hit the sack.
If you're not having a full out wedding, knock yourselves out with your wedding night... but if you ARE.. just don't keep your expectations too high!
2007-03-28 13:55:26 · answer #8 · answered by euro_4ever 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just need to be VERY slow and gently. Candles are good - but if it's too expected she may get nervous. Lots of touching beforehand. Don't just jump on her. Take it slow and don't expect much. If it's your first times - EVER - she's not going to like it sexually - only emotionally, so focus on that.
2007-03-28 13:32:11 · answer #9 · answered by lucki female 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Definitely the music and candles. Also, tell her how much you love her, how beautiful she is, and thank her for marrying you. Say it over and over all night and first thing the morning after. She'll never forget it, and it will mean so much.
2007-03-28 14:16:45 · answer #10 · answered by StormyC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋