Lakisha Jones
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'Last Dance' by Donna Summer
My grade: B+
Recap: Donna Summer, because of her Queen Of Disco lapel, never really gets the credit she deserves as one of the great Rock vocalists. She must be speed-dialing her agent tonight as two contestants performed her classics. LaKisha's was fairly faithful to the original, and somewhere Summer is smiling. It's a wonderful vocal -- it's always a delight to hear LaKisha hitting each note with clarity and power, and it's not often we see such a bouncy reprieve of her ballad-heavy canon.
My prediction: Heaven knows it is the way it should be –- straight to the safety zone.
Expert prediction: Access Hollywood anticipates a shocker elimination this week and thinks LaKisha will get the boot.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Chris Sligh
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 28
Hometown: Greenville, SC
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic' by The Police
My grade: C
Recap: Chris' proclivity to out-pace the accompaniment (or vice-versa), as is often mentioned, wasn't such a distraction tonight: he wasn't out-of-step insomuch as he was lazy on the downbeat, and when you're attempting a reggae influenced number, that's the most important factor. He dissipated any originality and pretty much mimicked Sting's vocals –- like an over-stuffed Blaked potato (Lewis pun intended). While I scoffed his 'master class on theory' remark –- velocity has zilch to do with music theory, Chris –- his wheezing delivery and listless vocals might not save him from bottom 3 territory.
My prediction: That breath he takes... might be his last. Bottom 3.
Expert prediction: TV Guide and MTV News think Chris Sligh will have a lot more time to sleep after he's sent packing this week.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Gina Glocksen
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 22
Hometown: Naperville, IL
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'I'll Stand By You' by The Pretenders
My grade: B
Recap: Gina was a 'wreck' meeting one of her inspirations in Gwen, and appeared to remain that way once she took the stage; she reminds me of a Valley Girl working part-time at Trash And Vaudeville (search: Trash & Vaudeville). Parts of Gina's Pretenders rip were so right on I thought I needed to irrigate my ears to assure myself that she was actually 'that good.' But listening back to the MP3, I knew my senses weren't bamboozling me; this performance wasn't as incandescent as the judges waxed. While it was undoubtedly her finest moment yet on Idol, there were instances of apprehension in her delivery indicative of un-assuredness. Her vocals could have soared; instead, they glided over some rough terrain.
My prediction: Her fans will stand by her: Safe.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Sanjaya Malakar
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 17
Hometown: Federal Way, WA
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'Bath Water' by No Doubt
My grade: C+ (Upped half a grade for his attempted believability in singing the words '...my kind of girl')
Recap: Tonight, like the bastard offspring of Sigue Sigue Sputnik (search: Sigue Sigue Sputnik), Sanjaya is screwing with us. Yes, he's peculiar. Yes, his presence here undermines Idol's original ideal (which died pretty much during Season 1, but that's another article). And, no, he's not the best singer in the competition. Okay, he's been pretty much God-awful post-auditions, but you know what? Votefortheworst and Howard Stern be damned; he's crazy as all hell and he's enjoying the ride. I haven't seen anything on TV as flamboyant as Sanjaya since JM J Bullock sat Center Square. And as my dreams for his rendition of 'Hollaback Girl' faded when he went for 'Bath Water,' so did my loathe of him. I'm not sure if it's his heart that's not in it, or if he's trying to get voted off. Or maybe, bless his wee soul, he knows he could coax on the sheer audacity of it all. I do know that if he sticks around for another week, I will continue to revel in the unintentional hilarity of it all. At least he's more 'entertaining' than Haley or Chris R.
My prediction: Step out of the dirty bath water, Sanjaya, you're safe again.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Haley Scarnato
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 24
Hometown: San Antonio, TX
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'True Colors by Cyndi Lauper
My grade: C
Recap: Mewing like a High School choral member invited to perform on the Jerry Lewis Telethon, Haley, for the most part, took Stefani's not-so-sage advice and stuck to the melody, to no real avail. As the manufacturers of NyQuil file Chapter 11 as I write, her delivery was soporific at best, generic at worst. The simplicity of this song is NO showcase for any voice, as even Cyndi Lauper utilized it to downplay her wild-child persona. When you're trying to win a singing contest, it's best not to put your audience to zzzzz's.
My prediction: The true colors of the audience might show: going home.
Expert prediction: Entertainment Weekly, LA Times and Yahoo! TV all believe Haley and her legs will be taking a hike.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Phil Stacey
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 29
Hometown: Jacksonville, FL
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'Every Breath You Take' by The Police
My grade: B
Recap: Frequently, Stacey's miniscule lower range suctions away any iota of melodic phrasing, and his melodramatic upper-range deduces any beauty he might attempt. Adequate tonight merely as a Sting impersonator, Phil's lethargic stamp on The Police's stalker anthem brought nothing inspiring to the mic stand, nothing awful to observe. It was well sung and actually restrained by his standards. And I was bored. Sing me to sleep, Phil, but don't sing me TO sleep.
My prediction: Perhaps bottom three, but take another breath Phil: You're safe.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Melinda Doolittle
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 29
Hometown: Brentwood, TN
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'Heaven Knows' by Donna Summer
My grade: B+
Recap: Even on her worst day, Melinda could sing rings around Gwen's Betty Boop vocal tics and kewpie doll persona. In her safest performance to date, Melinda displayed her usual flawless delivery on the second Donna Summer cut of the night, yet I'm beginning to fret for her prospective stamina in this race. Of course she's the greatest Idol singer since Fantasia; she should already be a superstar with a couple of Grammy's on her shelf (hell, if Norah Jones has 10...). But her inclination to forgo modernizing her song selection might incur damage to her remarkable fan base, which I am a proud constituent; sure, we will love her to death, but will there be defectors? Will viewers buy into that too-good-to-be-true modesty? Will she pull a Tamyra Gray and just-miss Top 4 due to an erroneous selection? Will Melinda be the new Oprah, with an equal love her/hate her public debate? Am I putting too much negativity out into the universe? Should I stop berating 'The Secret' and it's foolish panderers?
My prediction: Heaven knows, the love is still there: Safe.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Blake Lewis
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 25
Hometown: Bothell, WA
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'Love Song by The Cure via 311
My grade: C- (Docked half a grade for polluting us with 311s tepid arrangement)
Recap: Even at his best, Blake is no better or worse than a modernized street urchin from 'Oliver' cooing 'Consider yourself one of us!' He's charming, sure, even a real cutie, and the gals love him (just wait for that rude awakening, girls), but a big BOO and HISS to the judges for never calling Blake out on his total lack of originality. He's not demonstrated an iota of uniqueness all season, instead opting to mime modern-rock singers with a soupcon of trip-hop styling all for a hipster cred. In tonight's scenario, it could be that the judges, who previously admitted never hearing of 311 (they should thank their gods for that), didn't realize that Blake's rendition was not The Cure's, but 311's, but I surmise I'm one of the few who do not fall for his charade.
My prediction: The love songs go on and on: He's safe.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Jordin Sparks
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 17
Hometown: Glendale, AZ
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'Hey Baby' by No Doubt
My grade: C+
Recap: I pray this is a temporary fall from grace. After last week's revelation, I will cut Jordin the slack of wanting to insert some buoyancy into her theme this week. But it was a monumental gap in quality. Of the hundreds of choices Idol offers, did she really need to disgorge a discordant No Doubt miscreant with nary a melody or refrain worth remembering? Her performance of it was fried in pig-fat, greasy, unhealthy, shocking. Instead of owning the stage, she was lost in the maze, as her vocals were winded and gasping and her limits shone as bright as a nova star. The judge's hosannas for this performance were mind-numbingly inappropriate. Jordin is a star-in-the-making, but tonight there must have been a full moon over the Kodak. I trust her followers will be able to save her, and for that I'm gratified.
My prediction: Boys say, girls say: Safe, but give me something like this again and I turn in my membership.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
Chris Richardson
'American Idol' Finalist
Age: 22
Hometown: Chesapeake, VA
Theme: Gwen Stefani favorites
Song: 'Don't Speak' by No Doubt
My grade: C-
Recap: If Sanjaya is this year's John Stevens (if not Jasmine Trias), then Chris R. is Season 6's Justin Guarini. What saves Chris from being, let's say, the new Ace Young is that, for all his nasality, his sincerity never teeters in superciliousness, as Ace's always did (plus, realistically, Ace was a terrible singer). Richardson's sincerity seems authentic, not unlike the quasi-talented Guarini. But let's face it, like Guarini, Chris could be the lost member of O-Town for all his lack of skill. No one would ever accuse Gwen Strefani of vocal eloquence, but her 'Don't Speak' is seeped with emotion. Chris flatlined any sentiment from it's personal lyrics. But never underestimate the power of the teenage girl and her obsession with bland white boys.
My prediction: I don't wanna say it: Safe.
more
Biography
Credits
Photos
2007-03-28 18:42:49
·
answer #3
·
answered by Lil Miss Answershine 7
·
0⤊
0⤋