What are some ways to really please my wife?

Question

She sometimes complains about me not helping her enough,etc.

Answer 1

I concur with SlickPam & Tommithesupermom's answers. They are 90% of what you need to consider.

In my situation, my husband is wheelchair dependent from a major stroke whereby he is paralyzed on his right side. He can move, but it's a struggle just depending upon one side of your body to do everything. So, I don't see Patrick as lazy or rude or inconsiderate when he leaves things about. I know that it is very difficult for him to carry things about and it's a struggle to go from one side of the house to the other with just a mechanical chair. So, I am happy to "fetch" and put away things for him, because I know that the little things are hard for him to keep up with. I work two jobs 2x per week, so I'm tired when I come home, but he loves my cooking, so at 10pm each night, we have dinner. And I do clean up, and I do do laundry then sometimes. For a regular guy, I would not have held such patience, but God is teaching me patience through my marriage with Patrick.

What does he do for me? Bundles and bundles of love, attention, appreciation, kind words for me, sympathy, support, calling me beautiful, lusting after me and loving me with all his heart. The look in his eyes when he sees me when I come home - his face lights up, I swear! And he calls me throughout the day to tell me just that he loves me. I may do physically for him, but emotionally, he does tons for me.

There is no way to compare nor do we see who is "giving" more. This is a partnership through love. We all do what we can in the best way we can do it.

032807 6:20

Answer 2

Hi there,

First, I would like to say Congratuations on being willing to step up your efforts, that is half the battle!! I would have to recommend that you ask your wife specifically what she needs help with. Every woman, situation, household has different dynamics/needs. Do you have children? If so, try helping with homework, or taking them to any games / practices / meetings they may have. If they are very young in age, try taking them out for a walk in the early evening to tire them out and give your wife a break. If you don't cook, take a class or borrow some cookbooks from the library and TRY. I think the biggest thing women want to see from their mate is EFFORT. Help with the laundry, or wash the dishes. I would also advise that you ASK HER TO SHOW YOU how she likes/prefers to have it done. I know this sounds ridiculous, but she may have a particular way of sorting the laundry, or folding the clothes. Whatever it is, try to be patient. If she gets overly fussy or picky, just tell her that when she thinks this way, it discourages you from wanting to help and puts her back in the position of having to do everything herself. I had to learn not only to let my other half take care of things, but to let him do it HIS WAY. This is not as easy as it sounds. So much is required to run a household, I am sure you can find some way of helping that both of you are comfortable with. Have a talk with her and see what you two can work out. With the chores more equitably divided, you'll find that your wife has more energy, is more pleasant, and the two of you will have more quality time together!!! Good Luck!

Answer 3

There are several things you could do. One day while she's gone you could help out with the housework, do the laundry, vaccuum, clean the bathroom, sweep and mop, etc. Maybe one night cook her dinner, if you don't normally cook, it could be ANYTHING, hamburger helper even, she'll totally appreciate the effort. Completely serve her, make her plate, pour her wine, tea, water, (whatever she drinks), and pick up after she's done, do the dishes, wipe off the table, etc, don't let her lift a finger. Afterward maybe play with her hair while you're watching tv, or rub her back.

Answer 4

Here's advise from a marraige veteran. Listen to what she has complained about and just do it. If she complains about the laundry, do the laundry. If the floors need to be mopped mop the floors.

She'll still complain because you didn't do it her way but now you have given yourself chance to say you tired to help but you are still complaining.

Answer 5

I have a best friend who goes through the same thing and it really makes me mad because he really does work hard I have found out that usually his wife is just had a bad day and so she takes it out on him its not right but he never gets mad and just tries to make it work I would love to see him leave and be happy but that is not the answer just keep your head up do what you are doing and talk to her ask how her day was and tell her that you love her

Answer 6

don't just get up from the dinner table and go sit down, stay in the kitchen and bring the dishes over, or wipe off the counters, etc...i have a very loving relationship with my hisband of 28 years, he just forgets that I want to spend time with him, not necessarily that I want him to do all of the work...but if she works outside the home, then buddy, you need to be helping to do it all...maybe take responsibility for the laundry, it's not that hard anymore as long as you fold it and put it away...

Answer 7

Rent a two seater bike, and go riding arownd, or take her to the mall. Also, in the summer, get out and a water gun fight.
Learn how to do an erotic massage. Good Luck

Answer 8

offer to do something you dont normally offer to do..that would really surprise her and make her feel good. and pamper her once and awhile with maybe a back rub or foot massage that would score some points i would know haha..but dont expect anything in return because im sure shed sense it so play it off like your not wanting anything inn return and with a few random sessions of those massages shell think damn hes done this for me 2 or 3 times outa the goodness of his heart no strings attached..maybe i should reward him!! and that my friend is where you benefit!!

Answer 9

try new thing s

Answer 10

Take out the garbage, clean the bathroom, put the dishes in dishwasher or wash them after dinner. Ask her if there is anything you can help her with.